This is something I have experienced for many many years with many many different people.
It's in my heart and I can see and mostly understand all sides of the "culture coin".
Sending money home is common in Filipino culture.
Sending money home for the children is a given, it's an absolute must. In the same situation wouldn't we all do that?
Well, wouldn't we?
Look, make no mistake here, an OFW is not your average person.
A mother who got herself to another country, secured a job and supports her children and familty is not your average person.
A Filipina who sends money back home doesn't generally do it to look good, nor to be popular, nor to be a hero?
It's because the children and family are more important to her than her own well being.
I have many friends who work long long hours on minimum wage, send most of back home and often have nothing left over for a good life of their own or even an annual visit to Pinas.
In many ways that is so sad.
But look, education for the children is so so important. Please remember that in the Philippines education always needs financial support.
I'm not going to deny some suggestions that many Filipina's have indeed been raised from the cradle to serve the family.
Additionally I agree that generally the upbringing is very focussed on being hard-working for the benefit of family. Don't let's forget that we husbands are part of the family.
But I personally still maintain that in nearly all cases a Filipina sends money back home because she is a giving and loving person and she believes it is the best thing to do that can help lift their family.
For a lot of Brit/Filipina marriages, remittances can be a big issue.
Western cultures generally do not share the same family values as most Pinoy households do.
I’m not suggesting it's good or bad or good. Just that there are big differences and that there are pros and cons to both sides.
Of course, I know of Brit/Filipina couples who have issues and problems relating to sending money back to Philippines.
Sometimes I do too.
Is it true that sending money back home makes the relatives lazy and not feel the need to work for themselves or the larger family circle? I'm sure there are instances where there is a lot of truth in that.
Is it true that sending money back home doesn't in fact help anyone, but actually makes life worse for every one? Possibly there is some truth in that too.
I know that my thinking might put me in danger of being accussed of idealising and romanticising the Philippine culture for family values.
But I hope that no matter how modern or “western” Philippine society will become the years of Philippine upbringing and the creation of that special Pinoy
family bond will never be lost in the years they spend in western culture.
Saints? No
Hero's? No
Responsibility? More than likely.
Burden? Often.
We all know blood will always be thicker than water.
