After a busy day, an elderly friend of mine settled down in his train from Waterloo for a nap as far as his destination at Winchester, when the chap sitting near him hauled out his mobile and started up:-
"Hi darling it's Peter, I'm on the train
- yes, I know it's the 6.30 not the 4.30 but I had a long meeting
- no, not with that floozie from the typing pool, with the boss
- no darling you're the only one in my life
- yes, I'm sure, cross my heart" etc., etc.
This was still going on at Wimbledon, when the young woman opposite, driven beyond endurance, yelled at the top of her voice,
"Hey, Peter, turn that bloody phone off and come back to bed!!"![]()