A right mess

[Ady]

Hi all,

I wonder if anyone can help me. My gf has been separated from her husband for 3 years now. But, we have a problem.

The husband's family have recently decided to adopt a child, and have registered it in the name of my gf and her husband - without my gf's knowledge or agreement.

She is going tomorrow to get the name changed, but I fear it may be too late. I want to seek an annulment with her. But, if she is listed as the child's mother, I think the annulment will be impossible.

I am really mad at the situation - and have no idea how it is even possible.

Does anyone have any information that can help me - sites etc.

[KeithD]

Her name isn't on the birth certificate, and nor is her signature on the addoption papers, so it should be easy to resolve, probably need to speak with a solicitor out there.

[andypaul]

Get a decent Lawyer like de boss man say a few strongly worded letters may help you both, from what i have read of others experiences you need local legal advice and fast to ensure no mistakes are made even before the annulment process.

[mach]

Hi all,

I wonder if anyone can help me. My gf has been separated from her husband for 3 years now. But, we have a problem.

The husband's family have recently decided to adopt a child, and have registered it in the name of my gf and her husband - without my gf's knowledge or agreement.

She is going tomorrow to get the name changed, but I fear it may be too late. I want to seek an annulment with her. But, if she is listed as the child's mother, I think the annulment will be impossible.

I am really mad at the situation - and have no idea how it is even possible.

Does anyone have any information that can help me - sites etc.

it is not that easy to adopt a child legally in the philippines. there are so many things involved. i suggest that you ask your girlfriend the exact details.

[KeithD]

If the people doing this are not rich, then they can't afford a lawyer, and if they see you have one, they'll probably run scared and settle up.

[Ady]

Really it is a mess. I just came off the phone to my girlfriend.

As a background, her husband left her 3 years ago - to another woman. In February, he stated that his cousin was pregnant, and he wanted to register the baby in his name - and he wanted my girlfriend to place her name as the mother. She refused. Her ex-husband apparently has an over powering mother that wants to take care of the baby. Also, the ex-husband is unable to father a child.

However, she has recently discovered that they used her name in registering the child. So the parents are my girlfriend and her ex-husband. The child was registered on February 23rd.

My girlfriend went to the midwife today - and obtained the birthcertificate. The names there are her exhusband and her. However, there are no signatures. My girlfriend pointed out to the midwife that there is a big error - and that the child is not her's and she never consented to the registration or use of her name.

I am mad because they misuse her name. They have done many things to her, killed her self confidence - and now this.

As I say, I want to start filing for an annulment, because I want to be with my girlfriend (apologies for the anonymity). But, with the recent (illegal) registration of a child in the name of her and her ex - will this now be impossible?

I have asked her to find a lawyer that will help - not only in annulment, but in clearing this misuse of her name.

I am just wondering how the current situation could possibly affect any annulment and subsequent visa applications? If anyone can give advice or warnings for this, I would be grateful. If you have some good news then I would love that too!!! I just want to get her to the UK, and I want to give her a happier lifetime.

Thanks a lot guys and gals for replying to me. I am just worried that this will jeopardise our future plans.

Thanks

Ady

[andypaul]

Your girlfriend needs to testify she didn't sign the paperwork, but again i stress get local legal help.

I don't know but i would have thought trying to apply for anything from the goverment and providing fraudlent documents normally means big trouble so if you get a decent lawyer like admin says the family will most likely back down unless they like jail.

Ps if she did nothing wrong but her family did it shouldn't affect her application.

[Ady]

Thanks Andy. I will check with my girlfriend when she is online tomorrow. She is a bit upset and tired today. Cheers.

[Peanutz]

Really it is a mess. I just came off the phone to my girlfriend.

As a background, her husband left her 3 years ago - to another woman. In February, he stated that his cousin was pregnant, and he wanted to register the baby in his name - and he wanted my girlfriend to place her name as the mother. She refused. Her ex-husband apparently has an over powering mother that wants to take care of the baby. Also, the ex-husband is unable to father a child.

However, she has recently discovered that they used her name in registering the child. So the parents are my girlfriend and her ex-husband. The child was registered on February 23rd.

My girlfriend went to the midwife today - and obtained the birthcertificate. The names there are her exhusband and her. However, there are no signatures. My girlfriend pointed out to the midwife that there is a big error - and that the child is not her's and she never consented to the registration or use of her name.

I am mad because they misuse her name. They have done many things to her, killed her self confidence - and now this.

As I say, I want to start filing for an annulment, because I want to be with my girlfriend (apologies for the anonymity). But, with the recent (illegal) registration of a child in the name of her and her ex - will this now be impossible?

I have asked her to find a lawyer that will help - not only in annulment, but in clearing this misuse of her name.

I am just wondering how the current situation could possibly affect any annulment and subsequent visa applications? If anyone can give advice or warnings for this, I would be grateful. If you have some good news then I would love that too!!! I just want to get her to the UK, and I want to give her a happier lifetime.

Thanks a lot guys and gals for replying to me. I am just worried that this will jeopardise our future plans.

Thanks

Ady

Hi Ady, I read your post and it is just a little bit confusing...Your girlfriend husband left her 3 years ago, and last february the husbands cousin of your girlfriend got pregnant and they put their name to the child without your girlfriend consent. Right? Now, first thing is you can't just put a name of whoever in a new born baby just like that, that is a fact! If the Midwife allowed that kind of thing (presuming that she knows the law) she will be jailed and worse than that can happen to her if this kind of thing comes to the attention of any government office. Second, if your girlfriend can prove that she is not aware of this things then the family of her husband will be in a very big trouble. As what everyone says, you should seek a local legal assistance, I hope your girlfriend is saying the truth (no offence meant) because it is not that easy to give a name to a new born child other than their natural parents. My sister is a Midwife and I know that they never, never do things like that it is against the law and if you get caught doing this, they will be expel and won't be able to practice again. I hope you and your girlfriend can sort your probs.

[Peanutz]

N.B.

Once you start a legal measures know that you will cause trouble to the family of your girlfriends husband and to the midwife and whoever is involve in that matters. If your girlfriend has told you the truth then she can prove it with legal help and be sure that she is ready to go through all this trouble that she will cause to her ex-husband and family.

[andypaul]

N.B.

Once you start a legal measures know that you will cause trouble to the family of your girlfriends husband and to the midwife and whoever is involve in that matters. If your girlfriend has told you the truth then she can prove it with legal help and be sure that she is ready to go through all this trouble that she will cause to her ex-husband and family.

A very good point i have read of many cases where a person who suddenly gives in to family pressure or just doesn't need the hassle.

You also need to clarify every point as i have had experienced times when suddenly a little point which was forgotten to be mentioned but had huge implications is mentioned in passing.

[Ady]

Really you are a big help. It seems the midwife was fooled from what I can gather - but without knowing the procedures for Child registration I cannot be sure exactly what happened.

I have been with my gf for 2 years - a little more, and see her most days in the cam so I am pretty sure she was not pregnant in that time.

The baby was born 8 months ago - and registered Feb 23.

Just 2 weeks ago I was with my gf in Hong Kong - but we come home to this

We will seek an annulment, and my gf just wants her name cleared from their illegal acts. At the moment her husband says he will not contest the annulment - but maybe their stance will change if we seek legal advice. However, I want her name cleared before starting the annulment process - because these things can be lengthy.

No offence taken Peanutz - and I am most grateful for your efforts in replying. Thanks to you all.

[andypaul]

I dont know phill law at all with regard anullment but although not what you need. this act by her husband once proven to be acting ilegally should help strengthen her case for annulment i would have thought.

[tiger@tigress]

Really you are a big help. It seems the midwife was fooled from what I can gather - but without knowing the procedures for Child registration I cannot be sure exactly what happened.
I have been with my gf for 2 years - a little more, and see her most days in the cam so I am pretty sure she was not pregnant in that time.
The baby was born 8 months ago - and registered Feb 23.
Just 2 weeks ago I was with my gf in Hong Kong - but we come home to this
We will seek an annulment, and my gf just wants her name cleared from their illegal acts. At the moment her husband says he will not contest the annulment - but maybe their stance will change if we seek legal advice. However, I want her name cleared before starting the annulment process - because these things can be lengthy.
No offence taken Peanutz - and I am most grateful for your efforts in replying. Thanks to you all.

it will be alot easier if the ex will not show up in the court! thats if

[eljean]

have you ever met your gf in person yet?you never mention though...

[andypaul]

have you ever met your gf in person yet?you never mention though...

Just 2 weeks ago I was with my gf in Hong Kong - but we come home to this

[Ady]

Hi Eljean.

I met my gf finally last June. Because she lives in Davao - and we all know the situation in Mindanao - I was reluctant to go there. Mainly my family concerns, and also because I have little experience in travelling. I tried to get her here for 3-4 weeks - but our visitor visa was refused last September.

We met playing dominoes in Yahoo games in September 2004 - and the relationship developed in April 2005. I speak to her daily in the net, by cam, by phone. Even we chat everyday - we also mail each other everyday. And that has been the case for 3 years (friendship and more). We have arguments, siyempre, but I see her everyday.

Thanks a lot to all for your advice so far. My gf will be seeing a lawyer on Monday - her kuya will attend with her. I have asked her to speak about the birth certificate and also the annulment.

I know it is a complicated situation - and I know some of you may think that my gf is pulling wool over my eyes. However I am 100% sure she has not been pregnant in the last 3 years otherwise I would notice in the camera. And, having met her in person and being a good judge of character, I think she is telling the truth about this.

Thanks again

Ady.

[eljean]

Hello Ady,

sorry bout that i didn't read your previous post thats why i asked if you have already met ...
so she have a 9 years old daughter as well...
I'm from Davao as well its not that really dangerous in there as long as you just live in the city my husband had been in somehow the most dangerous and notorious street in Davao as what it is being known in there where i live...and his
actually, a young lad but his visit was been safe and he enjoy staying it there...
for sure your gf will be able to solve all the mess about the misuse of her name...

[Ady]

Thanks a lot Eljean. Maybe I will go to Davao next year when the annulment process has started. I am a bit ashamed of myself that I ask to meet her in Hong Kong rather than Davao. My gf works in an internet cafe in Buhangin.

I am glad I found this site - sometimes in the last three years I have been desperate for advice from people in the same situation, and I hope I can help the fellow forum users sometime too.

Thanks a lot.

Ady

[eljean]

its alrightwish you all the best hope things will work out right for both of you...dont worry about the settlement application because the forum will always be here for all of your query about it...as soon as you settled that first two things annulment and misuse of her name it will be easier for both of you to be together....good luck