tut tut tut tut there ricky,utter rubbish, or may be i am just lucky, go in with both eyes open i say and you may find the one person that loves you for who you are,indeed i shall say i am blessed knowing Emma,
tut tut tut tut there ricky,utter rubbish, or may be i am just lucky, go in with both eyes open i say and you may find the one person that loves you for who you are,indeed i shall say i am blessed knowing Emma,
You found a diamond Steve, and I know you appreciate her so much! As I said, just an observation in most cases, but I think both of you knew exactly what your situation was and appreciated the realities of life in the UK and the cultural differences.
You have a heart of stone, Steve.Originally Posted by stevewool
my Em has never asked for money when she was in the phils and never asked for it here too, but my god she wont shut up about the iphone5, but it falls on deaf ears Em
I met a Filipina online before I met my wife. She ended up asking me for money to help her with her nursing exams. I can't remember how much now but it wasn't really a small amount. I refused. It brought our relationship to a close.
My wife has never asked me for any money. Its a question of finding the right girl.
This isn't completely true as upbringing, beliefs and morals come into it too.
what do u think about this tone ?
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk...n-7851308.html
I'll think I'll start paying me £4 a month for a Swiss VPN again soon
I think the authorities are already behind the curve, all the criminals/terrorists will already be using VPN's, data encryption and obfuscation!
They will gather a lot of chatter, look for patterns and lets say we exchanged a few emails that had certain words we would be dawn raided!
Think the gov will follow the Americans, limit the use of encryption, extend the RIP Act 2000 and we are all criminals!
What bothers me is some idiot will leak our data and we'll end up having our I'd stolen...
Very true .....that goes for all the other scumbags on this planet...these monsters come in all shapes sizes and colours!probably true in most cases, but scammers come in all ages, professions, size and colour
Seconded.
I married that rare person in the Phils....a fellow Atheist. Tight-fisted too.
Off to a good start.
Just a shame she lied about how many kids she had...and their parentage.
How cow! Why the heck did it cost you over 4 times as much to visit that girl here in the Philippines than it costs my Matt each time he visits (here and when I was still in the US)? Where did the £3,000 go?
While I agree that more good can come out of a relationship with someone who has already shown that she is used to working for her own wants and needs, I do also agree with lastlid in that not all women in comfortable economic situations have good breeding, and not all poor people are money-hungry. Some of the wisest and most well-bred/well-mannered people I know grew up in Manila slums. That being said, please be advised that a very common Philippine bit of advise (which passes itself off as a joke but is beaten into our heads from an early age) is to look for someone who is old (or older), rich and decrepit (matandang mayamang madaling mamatay). Add the typically coveted white skin and you've got the makings of the perfect sugar daddy for anyone who's interested, especially with these foreign exchange rates. I think blackcat was right to visit the woman and hold off on the gifts until after seeing for himself what kind of person she was. But I also think one should run at the first sign of someone asking a complete stranger for money. Yes, I know some of you talked online and on the phone for a long time before you met, but meeting someone in person and having nonverbal communication then is just not the same as chatting on webcam or hearing the tears in someone's voice.
Don't rely solely on dating websites. They're prime targets for scammers.
I expect the 3k included flights...if he travelled cattle class, that's say, 700 then nice hotel and food...ive certainly spent that amount quite easily....not everybody goes getto stylie
Money well spent. Consider what it could of cost if he had married her and brought her home....a damn sight more than 3k, I can tell ya.
Oh yeah! You're right. I didn't think of adding board and lodging costs to the flight! Matt stays in a spare room and eats with the family whenever he visits.
Ugh! blackcat's lucky he didn't lose more than that.
hi there sorry to hear of your misfortune to be honest you have just been very unlucky ,its just a risk you have to take in your quest in search of an aisian g f .my own case was very lucky i actually sent my g f a small amount of money before i even met her without her asking me .when after 4 months i felt brave enough to fly 8000 miles to meet her and was so glad i did even after moving in with her living together for 12 months she did not once ask me about money ,but she has (confiscated my iphone steve lol )so i know ive got a good one and nearly 2 years we,re blissfully happy and will never go with a english girl again .so what i,m trying to say don,t give up because once you find the right one it will be worth it trust me ,its those scammers that give the geniune ones a bad name .there are are many forum members g f ,s and wives that have sisters that are looking to meet foreign guys maybe that could be a way ,anyway i hope you find the right girl soon good luck.
steve buy ya misus her iphone ya tight ass northerner lol
Yes. My wife wasn't raised in a Manila slum but nonetheless is from a poor background. But that didn't mean she wasn't well brought up.
But then Steve may feel compelled to declare that to the forum knowing that many co forumers arent exactly impressed with the iPhone.
I can see how it cost 3k. I didnt really keep a tally and treated my visits like a grand holiday. I think my flights alone cost pretty much £1000 as I have the Isle of Man leg to pay for. Plus internal Phils flights for me and the wife. Probably wasn't far off 3k, all in all.
I do agree with this, my ex wife was from a poor family and it seems saw me more or less as a money machine, as we married the experance cost me a lot of money, so caution without the rose tinted glasses is needed
Most here have been lucky or wise in their choice, but it is hard to know everything about a person in a lond distance relationship
My experance has not put me off, I would love to meet anouther Filipina, but my income now retired is just to low.
Love can find a way, but you still need enough money behind you, or you may just have more heartache
Mick.
Sorry to read of your bad luck but perhaps as this has happened 3 times you need to find a different approach. Personally alarm bells would ring for me if there was any request for money early on and contact should probably have been terminated at this point. Perhaps as has been suggested earlier in this thread a nice holiday with the intention of meeting somebody may be a better approach and then to continue online contact with someone you have already met.
I find it strange that you would seek to start some form of relationship and then send a laptop with spyware loaded . This suggests that perhaps you have a problem with trust and perhaps you are attracting the wrong sort of Lady as most women would run a mile if you done this to them. Anyhow good luck in your search
its not down to there position in life now, what job they have to prove they are a good person, i did not have much when i was growing up, there was 13 mouths to feed so you can imagine what it was like then, nothing like now days with the hand outs they seem to get, but the most important thing we got was lots of love and manners, this is what i have given my kids and i hope it gets them what i have got in my life, what i am trying to say is if there is love in the family and respect that is the most important thing to have, in Emmas family you can see that there is plenty of love, they are not rich but neither are they poor, but they have respect for each other and for me too, so to go back to the question about jobs well its our you are brought up in the first place
Well-said Steve.
Well said Steve. I didn't judge my wife or her family on their material wealth. They have a wealth of Kindness, love, faith and all round happiness that never ceases to impress and uplift me.
Health and happiness before wealth every day of the week
As he said.Perhaps as has been suggested earlier in this thread a nice holiday with the intention of meeting somebody may be a better approach and then to continue online contact with someone you have already met.
I find it strange that you would seek to start some form of relationship and then send a laptop with spyware loaded . This suggests that perhaps you have a problem with trust and perhaps you are attracting the wrong sort of Lady as most women would run a mile if you done this to them. Anyhow good luck in your search
So ok, you've been stung too many times, but maybe you're looking for the wrong sort of partner, or maybe - well, I don't like to say, I don't know you - but could part of it be you?
No offence, it's just that I've sometimes (And I bet we all have) met men from the UK, who have travelled to SE Asia to find wives because they are such selfish, bad tempered and unpleasant individuals that British women would tell them to take a running one, and they think Asian ladies are meek, submissive and will put up with anything (Not the case
If you know this isn't you - then you won't be the slightest bit offended by that remark, will recognise it applying to certain men and can laugh along to it
However, herein lies the problem, as you've probably already worked out. Let's say you're single, and you register on POF to meet someone nearby to your home town (Not a bad site, and it's free, I'd recommend it).
You get messages, and go on the occasional date. Do they all work out? Of course not, because you meet them, and only then do you realise they have some personal disgusting habit, or she's a great Theresa May fan, or you just frankly don't click - and the same for her, she might just not click with some aspect of your personality. That's what dating is all about.
So you've for whatever reason set your sights on the other side of the world - THAT makes it a tad difficult to get to know someone.
It can be even worse if you're meeting on a dating site. Think of how certain girls over there might see a website, which might attract rich (to them) older men, often with some sort of nutty stereotypical image of them, which all they have to do is live up to. It must be like the national lottery to them, or a job site promising executive positions.
I'm not having a go, I'm trying to be helpful. Like I said, I spent enough time in Thailand, where frankly I ended up really despairing of all these western and Aussie men falling for "bargirls", and being taken for vast sums of money.
It's like already said - often the more successful relationships are where both parties are equals in intellect or background. These men were falling for bargirls - just what do they think bargirls really are?
What a lot of men, even those who want to persist in calling them "bargirls" instead of what they would be called over here don't know, is that in many cases, these girls head for the resorts, knowing they will be selling fun times, but deep down hoping they will meet some nice western man who will marry them and look after them. It often actually happens (and in as many cases, doesn't the girl gets lied to, deeply hurt, ends up taking "ya-bah", there is a human cost to this that people don't realise, and which in the end sickened me so much).
Point is, that's little different to using a dating site.
So I've rabbited on, whole point is, if you really think you want to for whatever reason meet someone from SE Asia, well going on vacation there must be a better start than using a dating site.
Some may say use a dating site and set up a few dates on there for your visit. There's something about this approach that doesn't feel right to me, especially if you took it to third base (ahh school terminolgy, lets go have a cig behind the bike sheds).
I don't know what the best idea is. I'd just say don't be going to Subic looking for a girlfriend, unless you used it as a base and found a hotel worker you really got on with, or someone in a restaurant in a nearby town (And be forewarned, some girls working near such a town will on Saturday night head into the discos there to earn a little extra money from men they may meet)
I'm off, I'm turning into a cross between an agony aunt and a correspondent for a channel 4 documentary
If you speak to someone for long enough, day in day out for several hours a day minimum, every day, you soon pick up in passing, on what you need to know. Unless they are deliberately evasive.
Also, I had previously learnt the hard way from a rather devious and cunning young lady from Scotland...
we all have been burnt before, do you learn from them, some do some dont, just so glad i am out of that, makes me smile thinking all these beautiful young ladies admirring me
Good post Iani.
Thanks Graham
Actually, Lastlid has a very good point there. Speak to someone a lot, and you should find out a lot about them.
Something I do remember from one of those analysis tv programmes, they were discussing the contestants on "Big Brother" and discussing their body language when they first went into the "house".
The expert was saying, that for the first week or two, these people are going to if they wish, put on a front, but eventually with 24/7 coverage, they won't be able to hold that front, and their real self will be uncovered, whether that is a good or bad thing.
Well it's the same with a relationship, and once again I will say - if something seems dodgy, then it probably is.
Hence what I said in my previous post...
'A lot of research and even more common sense are all that is required, plus the right attitude towards women in the first place'.
I met my Fiancee through DIA and she is everything and more than I was expecting, but of course that didn't happen by accident.
DIA thats were i meet Emma
Sorry about what had happened to you... That's part of the LOVE MARKET SCENE. You will meet whole lots of frogs (liar, scammers, two-timers and a long list of ill people) before you get to kiss the princess. It's pretty ironic that it happens to people with "REAL INTENTIONS". I would hope that one day, a Filipina scammer would meet another foreign scammer and they scam each other. It would make their lives more colourful.
Read this poem I wrote few years ago about internet dating BUT I do hope you won't meet each kind.
http://thinjona.webs.com/apps/blog/s...he-love-market
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