Im just worried that the UKBA will send me home when my visa will run out and my husband will hold/ fight for our baby as I am not permanent or residence or citizen yet . Thats why I leave my husband and ask for help in one of the non-domestic aid because I am concern for our welfare and safety. I didnt have my solicitor yet. I think the police will find him as not guilty before I could have the solicitor.
I think it EXTREMELY unlikely that your husband will get custody of your child....given the circumstances that you have described.
In the vast majority of cases the mother is given custody in this country, regardless of the mother's immigration status.
There is nothing to stop you taking out a court order against your husband, regardless of what the police decide to do.
That again is something the people supporting you will be able to advise on (free advice charities, social services etc).
This isn't the Philippines where you have to pay enormous amounts of money to lawyers and then sit around waiting for decisions for years.
We have a proper legal system that is free to all who cannot afford to pay, plus free legal (and other) advice at your local Citizens Advice Bureau.
if i were the one who get abused i think the first thing i would like to do is to go back to phils and get comfort from my family
hmmm...poor advice!....The family might just telll her to patch things up with her husband. Wife beating is not uncommon in the Philippines I am sure. Also she has a much better future for herself and child in this country. I am sure UKBA and good legal representation will sort this out in her favour AND let her continue to stay here. Her husband has broken the law and will be penalised.Originally Posted by malditako
if i were the one who get abused i think the first thing i would like to do is to go back to phils and get comfort from my family
I don't think that is a poor advice. It's a matter of preference..As malditako had said, if it was her who got abused. I myself would rather go back to the Philippines just in case, like malditako. I am capable enough to raise a kid in the Philippines and I don't really care whether I get a visa to stay here or not. I would rather be with the support and company of my whole family and friends in times of trouble than alone here in this foreign country. Only a family who doesn't care of the welfare of their relative would tell their daughter/sister to stay in a relationship or patch things up with the husband who abuses her.As I have always told my husband, if things don't go well with our marriage. I'll pack my bags and leave this country. Like I did when I was living in Singapore.
-=rayna.keith=-
...When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible...
Excellent post Rayna...you saved me the time replying in not so eloquent terms as yourself.I don't think that is a poor advice. It's a matter of preference..As malditako had said, if it was her who got abused. I myself would rather go back to the Philippines just in case, like malditako. I am capable enough to raise a kid in the Philippines and I don't really care whether I get a visa to stay here or not. I would rather be with the support and company of my whole family and friends in times of trouble than alone here in this foreign country. Only a family who doesn't care of the welfare of their relative would tell their daughter/sister to stay in a relationship or patch things up with the husband who abuses her.
Steady on there folks.
We're only hearing one side of the story.
There is a child involved and there is a husband and father involved...with rights.
He can easily get a court injunction from a Judge to prevent his wife from removing THEIR child from the UK...as I did when the ex looked like she might be about to pull the same trick.
Graham...its my understanding that consent is required anyway when a lone parent is travelling with children? Ie. She just cant up sticks and run back to the phils with babies under each arm while the ol man's at work oblivious to what's going on.
Of course we are assuming what we are being told is the truth...that's all we can do...the reality could be a totally different ball game.
Not from this country mate.
Both the ex and I have travelled several times TO the Phils on our own with one or all of the kids.
It's travelling with children FROM the Phils that is the hard part...and that only if they have Phils passports.
Remember the UK is still (sort of) a free country....hence the number of gullible British women trying to recover kids from runaway muslim camel herders etc.
Domestic violence is one of the pitfall of getting married, men shouldnt treat their wives as property , dont ever back out with the case you filed against your ''foul husband '', the court will think that you are lying once you didnt push through with the case and in some circumstances it can over turn and give the chance for your '' foul husband '' to file a case against you...you said you got a child?? dont go back to the Philippines , your husband can get a court order not to bring the child outside of UK..take one step at a time, what is important is the protection of you and your child , the ILR can wait...push through the case , go to the Citizens Advice Bureau , they will help you to get legal aid , shelter, protection, benefits etc...
be strong and keep us updated on how it goes.
''Don't be serious..Be Sincere''
Hmmm...you have a point...ones first instnict would be to return home to where you have support of family and things are familiar to you. However, i think that would be playing into his hands and precisely what he wants her to do. I think she can get all the help she needs here..and help on the forum to guide her in the right direction.I don't think that is a poor advice. It's a matter of preference..As malditako had said, if it was her who got abused. I myself would rather go back to the Philippines just in case, like malditako. I am capable enough to raise a kid in the Philippines and I don't really care whether I get a visa to stay here or not. I would rather be with the support and company of my whole family and friends in times of trouble than alone here in this foreign country. Only a family who doesn't care of the welfare of their relative would tell their daughter/sister to stay in a relationship or patch things up with the husband who abuses her.
any parents who would tell their daughter to patch things up to their abusive husband are....Uk government may give you all the material things you might need but they cannot fill the feelings of being alone in this country. Pardon me if I may sound offensive but lovely12 worries are more of getting ILR athan whats going on with her marriage, with her and with her baby.
Maybe she is thinking further ahead. Return to Philippines - what chance of help or income = nil unlike in the UK there is a much better future for both Baby and mother. Child support agency will chase the father for support.any parents who would tell their daughter to patch things up to their husband are
Nobody actually knows the real situation here. For all we know the husband in question maybe quite will to support his child in the Philippines.
God forbid but, if anything was to happen bad between my wife and I, I for sure would want her back into the bosom of her family and I'd gladly support them.
Everything does not boil down to money...there have been times in the past where my wife as been so unhappy that she couldn't remember ever being so sad in the Philippines, not even her dark days....come on, too much emphasis on the money equals happiness rubbish.
Btw...thanks for the rep..whoever gave it
Just a little footnote...if people are wondering, I didn't cause the unhappiness...it was caused by missing her family and lifelong friends., no computer system can compensate for that..thank heavens we can apply for citizenship this November.
Another thought, its my belief that Filipino are not as nomadic as people think they are...look at us Brits, we dont see family from year to year..does it bother us..I should coco....yes, Filipino all over the globe but for what main reason?....its a terrible shame families who dont what to be torn apart, are. :(
Have another rep. I always need reminding anyway.
Thank you young Graham
Apparently I got to spread reputations around before giving you any more...there was me thinking a reputation was awarded on post quality...
what happened to the friend you stayed with? is he/she not helping you with this? what about the friends you wanted to go out with during a nyt out? do they know about this? how come you were saying you have no one to talk to, you're alone, but have got friends to go out with? are you really concern about your welfare and your baby? or your just concern for your ILR coz its gonna expire soon?
after reading this whole thread, thats my conclusion...how to extend the ILR and not your welfare and ur baby.....sorry....but hope you get out of that abusive situation permanently.
You got it all mixed up
''Don't be serious..Be Sincere''
[B]
[B]
You got it all mixed up
.this thread makes me cheer up...
Until now, I m still waiting for the appointment with my specialized solicitor for Immigrationto help me sort out my application for settlement . I didnt get any response yet. Im just worried now if it happen that my husband will found not guilty because I dont have enough evidence,will this affect my application for my settlement visa? The case will take in the court soon. Dont have feedback yet from the police.
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