Protecting my Heart!

[bigtombowski]

Some of you will remember that yesterday I put a post up that shared some of the questions my Mar was asking me . . . and I felt rather shocked by them actually.

Well, today, I received 2 questions from her in an email that made me really really shocked and actually made me feel a quite down!

I only felt down for a while coz whilst at work I spoke to my malaysian friend Jenny about it and she told me to reserve part of myself emotionally.

You see my friends, I freely admit to giving this girl 100% of my heart and soul and mind. I LITERALLY think of her all the time and I LITERALLY love her like the dearest part of me and I am always always always thinking about her.

Now, this poses a bit of a problem

You see, my gal lives several thousand miles away. So from my perspective I know that I love the girl, sure! I know that I desire her. I know that there are so much common interests that we share that it's not just coincidence that we met. But, she's not PERFECT, even if she is my most perfect match.

She's human and to err is human.

I have mentioned before in great detail why I love her. I have freely opened my heart and told everyone here how i feel about her . . . I'll link to it now http://filipinaroses.com/showthread....2125#post22125

But .. .

How can I really know a girl I have not met? How do i know that we are completely compatible until i actually meet the girl in person??

I know in theory that we'll be perfect together, and i believe it . .. but it'll only be manifested for real in december when i'm actually physically THERE with her!

So . . .
to finish the way i started . . . in the cafeteria with my friend Jenny . ..

she said . . .

"you see the 100% emotional involvement you have now?? Ok - cut it in half, and make it 50% and when you come back from the philippines and you STILL love her, make it 100% then"!

WOW what amazing advice in guarding my heart!



i'm a learner

tom

[KeithD]

Balls!!!

Don't listen to anyone else, it is your life, just go with the flow, how does someone else know what makes you tick inside?

I'm off to eat a pickled gerkin with custard.......

[bigtombowski]

actually, it depresses me to jump in with both feet and then get hurt!

i know i love her and that aint gonna change

but 100% giving of my soul is a bit much is it not?

[KeithD]

I wouldn't know, I keep my souls at the bottom of my shoes

[bigtombowski]

um ok!

maybe the girls can comment on souls and that

[Peanutz]

um ok!

maybe the girls can comment on souls and that

I can only advice you to be realistic Tom. Once you get to meet Mar that will be the only time you will know if your intuition and your feeling is right or wrong. Prepared yourself for any inconvenience and surprise. Don't forget to evaluate things with your heart involve, I am sure you will be fine:*

[bigtombowski]

thanks ate pea

[Peanutz]

thanks ate pea

Don't be afraid to get hurt. Remember that you are giving love and you should also learn the other faces of it. The more you get hurt the more you learn about love!

See, we are forever student what we know about life is nothing compares what it can offer to us. We only learn with our mistakes and I would prefer to make hundreds, million of mistakes rather not to risk.

[bigtombowski]

very wise advice from a very wise Big Sister!

Thank You Ate Pea . . . I appreciate your help

[Liliput39]

Life to me is taking chances, and I totally agree with what Peanutz says that we all learn (and should learn) from our mistakes. You should not worry yourself too much, remember ' much ado about nothing' until there is something to worry about, and you won't really know until the time you meet Marivic in person.

Also, remember the questions you have, that goes for her too.

I admire you are brave for giving 100%, but there is nothing wrong with looking after your heart too, especially when you've been hurt before. I believe we when can only be hurt as much...at the end of the day we are all different people with different look out in life - who is to say?

[bigtombowski]

thank you for your advice Ate Lili!

tom

[joebloggs]

I wouldn't know, I keep my souls at the bottom of my shoes

sounds like your giving her 100%, but is she giving you 100%, does she feel the same way about you ? you will not know til you meet your lady bigtom, and you might know when your holiday is over, and your both at the airport, and you say goodbye, and when you walk thru the entrance does she cry, or do you get a off, like i did everytime i left from my wife


i think shes nervous a bit, the big day is coming soon when you will meet, i'm sure she cannot wait to finally meet you, maybe shes worrying about will you like her ... as for your other posts, i don't know her, so dont lynch me , but her asking you them questions, maybe she wants to know what you think of it, if its that important to you, maybe shes trying to tell you something ???, i remember my wife, we had chatted for months, and oneday she told me, she had somethnig to tell me, this went on for hours, told me it was bad, and she made a mistake, etc,, i thought whats she done killed someone , after about 3 hours, and i mean 3 hours, she told me she had a 11yr old son, i justed , and said is that it .. our cultures are different, she was so worried about telling me

yes like someone has already said, and a line from the great beautiful south song ' let go with the flow' song ..
and let go with the flow bigtom and have a fantastic time

[bigtombowski]

thanks Joe!

[eljean]

i tell you what...if you worry a lot now that you haven't met yet and i supposed you are the man how much do you think this girl worry too?if she doesn't have anything to feel for you why bother and why falling in love together think of it if this love fails both will be hurt as well and if this love succeed both will be happy...

[claire]

im agree with : THE MORE U HURT, THE MORE U LEARN ABOUT LOVE.......
i love my husband even b4 we meet, and now im more happy and in love the more im with him now.... the secret is .... always give and take in a relationship........

[bigtombowski]

thank you claire!

give and take . . . she gives, I take

lol!

i thought i'd say it before keith chimed in

lol!
I love u really W2W!

[KeithD]

I love u really W2W!

[Peanutz]

love u really W2W!

DECLARATION OF NON-ENDING LOVE (AGAIN!!!)

[KeithD]

Better get the Vaseline in bulk form now on

[gWaPito]

hi 'big Tom' you need to think positive. If you think you will get hurt again, for sure you will!!!! Good luck

[bigtombowski]

thanks markie, im with ya on that mate! cheers buddy

ooohhh me and keith . . . the secret's out! sorry ping! lol

hahaha

t