working mother

[Moy]

for those mum here who work and at the same time wife and mum..how do you mange your time after come home from a very long day work
so tiring..yet fulfilling but blimey with few kids and a husband waiting home..you prepare dinner and house chores wipes you out...is this normal..lolz
although am aware im not in typical home..PH WHERE there is a nanay or tatay who can look out for kids in here you have to do it all in one
i sounds complaining but maybe i am...lolz..
i wish i could survive

[lastlid]

My previous marriage lasted 25 years. We had 2 kids. My ex wife never worked. So cant help you there...

[Moy]

My previous marriage lasted 25 years. We had 2 kids. My ex wife never worked. So cant help you there...

25yrs blimey..she should belong to those who are unfortunate that time lastid

[joebloggs]

and a husband waiting home..you prepare dinner and house chores wipes you out...is this normal..lolz

waiting for what, my misses doesn't cook me anything and hasn't for many years and why should she

my misses leaves for work 7:40am, drives for 1hr, finishes after 5pm and doesn't get home til after 6pm, so I help the misses get little joe ready for school, makes his breakfast, take him to the child minder, go to work, pick him up from the childminder, its not easy but you do what you have to do

[Moy]

waiting for what, my misses doesn't cook me anything and hasn't for many years and why should she

my misses leaves for work 7:40am, drives for 1hr, finishes after 5pm and doesn't get home til after 6pm, so I help the misses get little joe ready for school, makes his breakfast, take him to the child minder, go to work, pick him up from the childminder, its not easy but you do what you have to do

childminder?? ah i thoughT you are looking after your son joe i got 3 kids and i wonder how much it cost for a child minder i bit we cant afford here lolz..
your wife doesNt cook you Joes i would sure will if i were her
but thanks for the input

[joebloggs]

no i work from 9 to 5 , either i or the misses (depending on where and what time she has to work) will take the kids to the childminder at about 7:45, the childminder takes them to skool and picks them up from skool,and i pick them up about 5:40pm

well she offers sometimes to cook me something, but i dont like the look of it , i think i will turn your food down for the same reasons

[CBM]

Moy, you have put your finger on a very big issue indeed. Actually I think its bigger than the age difference issue (where that eixsts).

A Filipina marrying a Brit and moving here leaves her family behind - no lolo, no lola, no tatay, no nanay, no uncles aunts, no kuya, no ate.

And she will very often be, or will soon become, a mother.

The problem is that she is joining a culture where both parents often need to work to pay the bills, but unlike her British friends at the school gate, she has no "support network" of relatives (yes, the British dump their children on their parents just like the Filipinos do! )

This is a fairly huge problem.

My Filipina ex wife didn't work until our younger son was six; two years after that she left me for another bloke, leaving me with the kids. Part of the problem, I suspect, was that we were both permanently tired (I've been even more tired, for the last two years!)

[Moy]

no i work from 9 to 5 , either i or the misses (depending on where and what time she has to work) will take the kids to the childminder at about 7:45, the childminder takes them to skool and picks them up from skool,and i pick them up about 5:40pm

well she offers sometimes to cook me something, but i dont like the look of it , i think i will turn your food down for the same reasons

i try to send you pm but i cant as it says your box are full and cant be send until your empty your inbox
so i will just have to post my msg here Joe apologize..

so how many hours does your kids spend time with the childminder Joe?? and how much does it cost you ??
you see am curious as i got kids as well..but am thinking it is so damn expensive.. and to be honest am really not comfortable my children would be look by other people.. and what ages are your kids??

[Moy]

Moy, you have put your finger on a very big issue indeed. Actually I think its bigger than the age difference issue (where that eixsts).

A Filipina marrying a Brit and moving here leaves her family behind - no lolo, no lola, no tatay, no nanay, no uncles aunts, no kuya, no ate.

And she will very often be, or will soon become, a mother.

The problem is that she is joining a culture where both parents often need to work to pay the bills, but unlike her British friends at the school gate, she has no "support network" of relatives (yes, the British dump their children on their parents just like the Filipinos do! )

This is a fairly huge problem.

My Filipina ex wife didn't work until our younger son was six; two years after that she left me for another bloke, leaving me with the kids. Part of the problem, I suspect, was that we were both permanently tired (I've been even more tired, for the last two years!)

hello CBM..i know what you saying
its been hard for me as well..but ill send you msg..to tell more about it..

[joebloggs]

A Filipina marrying a Brit and moving here leaves her family behind - no lolo, no lola, no tatay, no nanay, no uncles aunts, no kuya, no ate.

you dont have to be a Filipina for that to happen, I've no family member who can look after our kids for 5 mins never mind a few hours ,apart from my misses son (who works thou (from 8am to 6:30pm 4 days a week)) so it's been a major problem for us for many years,

[joebloggs]

i've deleted a few PM's Ross thanks for telling me

oh we pay the childminder £130 a week for looking after 2 kids from 7:45am to 9:00am (and taking them to school) and picking them up at 3:30pm til 6:00pm for 4 days a week (stepson has thursdays off)

[Jamesey]

It's hard!

I do long hours and my wife works pretty much full time as a nurse. She does 3 shifts per week, each over 12 hours. Sometimes they fall on a weekend or overnight though. We just end up paying a fortune on childcare! We're lucky that the nursery we use is very flexible and is open from 6.45am until 6pm.

Now that our son is 3 years old, we qualify for the Government's early years grant, which pays for 15 hours per week during term time.

I also don't have a large network of relatives to call on. My mother looks after him for one afternoon per week, but I that tires her out enough!

[CBM]

you dont have to be a Filipina for that to happen, I've no family member who can look after our kids for 5 mins never mind a few hours ,apart from my misses son (who works thou (from 8am to 6:30pm 4 days a week)) so it's been a major problem for us for many years,

Neither have I! Both my parents are long dead; I have one sister 200 miles away... that's the lot!

[joebloggs]

been there to Jamesy, and next week my wife will probably working shifts again meaning i have to take them to the child minder and pick them up

[joebloggs]

Neither have I! Both my parents are long dead; I have one sister 200 miles away... that's the lot!

i've a sister but she might as well be on the moon a brother who is 20 miles away but works and my mom who is in a care home.

but your right about the extended family in the phils, so many of the misses family could looks after them

[Moy]

i've deleted a few PM's Ross thanks for telling me

oh we pay the childminder £130 a week for looking after 2 kids from 7:45am to 9:00am (and taking them to school) and picking them up at 3:30pm til 6:00pm for 4 days a week (stepson has thursdays off)

m oh..can i be the childminder of your kids instead joe lolz..

[andy222]

A very big welcome to the uk moy. Any advice for the ones who want to come here?

[Moy]

A very big welcome to the uk moy.

thanks very much andy

[malditako]

moy i dont work here in UK but house chores and looking after with my parrot like son worns me out a lot of time. If I have to work i would demand help from my husband thats for sure. I dont cook dinner if i dont feel cooking theres so many take away around hehehe

[Moy]

moy i dont work here in UK but house chores and looking after with my parrot like son worns me out a lot of time. If I have to work i would demand help from my husband thats for sure. I dont cook dinner if i dont feel cooking theres so many take away around hehehe

hello malditako i like your name..here he he ..maldita sad ko sa atoah ..are you bisaya?
the husband help me but at times we woman has more things to do than a usual men chores..it not the same if you know what am saying..
i am in work but my mind is in my daily routine work when i wasnt been working

talking about take away its not my cup of tea nice foods here no denie but i have a great passion in cooking hehe

[lastlid]

hello malditako i like your name..here he he ..maldita sad ko sa atoah ..are you bisaya?
the husband help me but at times we woman has more things to do than a usual men chores..it not the same if you know what am saying..
i am in work but my mind is in my daily routine work when i wasnt been working

talking about take away its not my cup of tea nice foods here no denie but i have a great passion in cooking hehe

That was one benefit I had with my ex wife not working. She cooked some fantastic food.

[lastlid]

More wives is the answer, like in Joe's new thread.

[Moy]

That was one benefit I had with my ex wife not working. She cooked some fantastic food.

[imagine]

a mothers work is never done

[scottishbride]

To be a working Mum is not easy Moy. And yes, sometimes It can be very tiring and just want to jump into bed after work. I used to work night shifts and never seen my daughter and spend quality time with her. And also my husband whenever he's home I am working. This is one of the reasons I resigned, I want to spend quality time with my Daughter, you never know... time flies and their youth will never turn back. I want to enjoy it while she's still young. You know.. more cuddles and lambing from my daughter. I don't know if she will be the same when she grew up,kiss me goodnight and say I love you mummy.. . I think the best reward I got when I was working is whenever I get home after work is a big kiss from my hubby and dinner is ready.

[andy222]

To be a working Mum is not easy Moy. And yes, sometimes It can be very tiring and just want to jump into bed after work. :.

I hope my wife is like that when she comes here.

[grahamw48]

The ex used to work evenings...til 1am (restaurant cashier) and I worked days.

I used to take her to work and brought her home.

We shared all household duties.

I'd looked after myself from age 18 until getting married at 40, so no problem for me doing cooking, housework etc.

The children were supervised by one or other of us. Just a case of arranging jobs and hours to suit our lifestyle.

I bought a house close to the local schools so the older children could comfortably and safely walk there and I'd take the youngest to nursery school on my bike...my ex-wife picking him up later.

[grahamw48]

To be a working Mum is not easy Moy. And yes, sometimes It can be very tiring and just want to jump into bed after work. I used to work night shifts and never seen my daughter and spend quality time with her. And also my husband whenever he's home I am working. This is one of the reasons I resigned, I want to spend quality time with my Daughter, you never know... time flies and their youth will never turn back. I want to enjoy it while she's still young. You know.. more cuddles and lambing from my daughter. I don't know if she will be the same when she grew up,kiss me goodnight and say I love you mummy.. . I think the best reward I got when I was working is whenever I get home after work is a big kiss from my hubby and dinner is ready.

I totally agree with your post...your wish to be with your child.

You're quite right IMO. They do grow up so quickly and those early years are so precious.
Worth making a few sacrifices for and perhaps having less money and personal possessions.

[Moy]

To be a working Mum is not easy Moy. And yes, sometimes It can be very tiring and just want to jump into bed after work. I used to work night shifts and never seen my daughter and spend quality time with her. And also my husband whenever he's home I am working. This is one of the reasons I resigned, I want to spend quality time with my Daughter, you never know... time flies and their youth will never turn back. I want to enjoy it while she's still young. You know.. more cuddles and lambing from my daughter. I don't know if she will be the same when she grew up,kiss me goodnight and say I love you mummy.. . I think the best reward I got when I was working is whenever I get home after work is a big kiss from my hubby and dinner is ready.

i know what you saying scottishbride and that s our world for motherhood
with 3 kids and a husband it is hard but i do enjoy doin this for them even how tiring the work is and of course to please them in the way i know

[malditako]

hello malditako i like your name..here he he ..maldita sad ko sa atoah ..are you bisaya?
the husband help me but at times we woman has more things to do than a usual men chores..it not the same if you know what am saying..
i am in work but my mind is in my daily routine work when i wasnt been working

talking about take away its not my cup of tea nice foods here no denie but i have a great passion in cooking hehe

i am pure tagalog moy.