soo head ....ed!!! is there anybody here can give me advice???

[mikeann]

feb, 2010 i met an english man through friends here in manila, we started dating for 3 months before he go back to u.k , our relationship still going on through chat, email, phone calls everyday..last year august he back manila to see me and try sort my visa to u.k, but unfortunately he cannot get me out of phili as fiancee visa coz he still married to english woman, then he flew to england and back again last year november to manila and we lived as husband and wife ( lived-in) for a year ..we rented apartment in bacoor and open a small business ,but our relationship get worst , it endeed up he give me so much physical abuse..lots of verbal abused , i always forgive and forget despite of what he done to me, months and months ago still the same, so i get him arrested, because im such a sensible person i did not file a case against him, later on, i found out that he also hurt his extranged wife and ex-filipina gf, i think i was dealing and living with a phsyco, he is 100% alcoholic..now we still fighting,and still hurting me and tomorrow he will say how much he is inlove with me,..is it wrong to fight back and defensed myself? lots of complain from barangay, and police station, also i been through for medical examination..

can i file case against him?
is anybody out here who knows what i should do? or do i have to forgive and forget again? :-(

[Steve.r]

What an animal he appears to be... why dont you just leave him.... simple!! Leave him to rot in his own drunken hell.
If he has a history of woman beating, then it will not improve, you will not change him, you cannot 'love' a creature like this. Pack your bags and get as far away from him as possible.

[patsylou]

I agree this is not acceptable behaviour-get out now while you still can.

[Terpe]

What an animal he appears to be... why dont you just leave him.... simple!! Leave him to rot in his own drunken hell.
If he has a history of woman beating, then it will not improve, you will not change him, you cannot 'love' a creature like this. Pack your bags and get as far away from him as possible.

mikeann,
I completely agree with everything Steve has said.
You must get out now.
The longer you stay the more danger you put yourself in.

[grahamw48]

Just get rid of this lowlife NOW and PERMANENTLY, whatever it takes.

[melovesengland]

better to get urself out of him now dear before things get worst. you can maybe report him in the authority for him to be deported and banned from coming to the PI. He dont deserve YOU in the first place.

[raynaputi]

Pack your bags and leave first before worse comes to worst..and then file a case against him, about his abuse and all that. As you said, you already got medical reports and lots of police and barangay records. He would be lucky if he'll just be deported and get banned in the country..or better if he'll be jailed and get what he deserve. Remember, do not stick up with someone who abuses you.

[CBM]

What everyone else here has said - once a man has started to physically abuse a woman the ONLY safe thing to do is to LEAVE HIM because he WILL do it again - worse. He can never stop.

Leave him now - at once - and get yourself somewhere where he will not find you. Only then think about filing the case and getting him deported.

[deeen]

Do not "forgive and forget", it is a pattern he cannot break and you will suffer for the rest of your life.

Get out now, while you still can, and do not give him any way to contact you again.

Sorry but you must make a totally fresh start.

Then when you are free, look around you...
Remember there are thousands of gentle, decent, honest men who would love a beautiful filipina like you!

[imagine]

get out and go NOW, no one deserves that treatment, go now while you can, save yourself,

he wont change,

[Stuart]

I'm sorry you have gone through this. No man should ever raise his hand to a woman. I fully agree with all the advice thats been given so far. You sound like a fantastic person thats extremely loyal and I know that your heart is good.... But your loyaly and love should be rewarded. You deserve so much better. This behaviour is awful. PLEASE Protect yourself. Press charges and get him deported and find some one that really loves you. He wont ever change. Get yourself to somewhere U are safe. Dont Hesitate. Do It Now!!!! Best Wishes....

[London_Manila]

Filing charges may not be the best way forward for you

Justice over there usually means who can afford the more expensive lawyer wins

Leave him and cut all contact with him and start a new life

[tiger31]

a leopard never changes its spots ,for your own self respect if nothing else get out do not give him more chances because the result will always be the same your still young enough to find someone to treat you far better than this good luck

[Steve.r]

Also, he is still married..... so he is just using you to have his way, with no intension of ever making you his wife, you are effectively just his 'bit on the side' in another country.

I hope you sort your mind up. Everyone here has said exactly the same thing... we can't all be wrong.

[sars_notd_virus]

feb, 2010 i met an english man through friends here in manila, we started dating for 3 months before he go back to u.k , our relationship still going on through chat, email, phone calls everyday..last year august he back manila to see me and try sort my visa to u.k, but unfortunately he cannot get me out of phili as fiancee visa coz he still married to english woman, then he flew to england and back again last year november to manila and we lived as husband and wife ( lived-in) for a year ..we rented apartment in bacoor and open a small business ,but our relationship get worst , it endeed up he give me so much physical abuse..lots of verbal abused , i always forgive and forget despite of what he done to me, months and months ago still the same, so i get him arrested, because im such a sensible person i did not file a case against him, later on, i found out that he also hurt his extranged wife and ex-filipina gf, i think i was dealing and living with a phsyco, he is 100% alcoholic..now we still fighting,and still hurting me and tomorrow he will say how much he is inlove with me,..is it wrong to fight back and defensed myself? lots of complain from barangay, and police station, also i been through for medical examination..

can i file case against him?
is anybody out here who knows what i should do? or do i have to forgive and forget again? :-(

you are still lucky you are not married to him becoz he is still married ...you are not in a foreign land , so its easier to decide what to do and get the help from ,...yes you can file a case there is a new law Republic Act (RA) 9262 “Anti-Violence Against Women and Children is not against men. It is against men who treat their women as property

http://www.lawphil.net/statutes/repa...9262_2004.html

(a) "Violence against women and their children" refers to any act or a series of acts committed by any person against a woman who is his wife, former wife, or against a woman with whom the person has or had a sexual or dating relationship, or with whom he has a common child, or against her child whether legitimate or illegitimate, within or without the family abode, which result in or is likely to result in physical, sexual, psychological harm or suffering, or economic abuse including threats of such acts, battery, assault, coercion, harassment or arbitrary deprivation of liberty. It includes, but is not limited to, the following acts:
A. "Physical Violence" refers to acts that include bodily or physical harm;

B. "Sexual violence" refers to an act which is sexual in nature, committed against a woman or her child. It includes, but is not limited to:

a) rape, sexual harassment, acts of lasciviousness, treating a woman or her child as a sex object, making demeaning and sexually suggestive remarks, physically attacking the sexual parts of the victim's body, forcing her/him to watch obscene publications and indecent shows or forcing the woman or her child to do indecent acts and/or make films thereof, forcing the wife and mistress/lover to live in the conjugal home or sleep together in the same room with the abuser;

b) acts causing or attempting to cause the victim to engage in any sexual activity by force, threat of force, physical or other harm or threat of physical or other harm or coercion;

c) Prostituting the woman or child.

C. "Psychological violence" refers to acts or omissions causing or likely to cause mental or emotional suffering of the victim such as but not limited to intimidation, harassment, stalking, damage to property, public ridicule or humiliation, repeated verbal abuse and mental infidelity. It includes causing or allowing the victim to witness the physical, sexual or psychological abuse of a member of the family to which the victim belongs, or to witness pornography in any form or to witness abusive injury to pets or to unlawful or unwanted deprivation of the right to custody and/or visitation of common children.

good luck!!
remember he will not change ,give him a lesson!!

[Terpe]

Great stuff sars !
Really good info.

[grahamw48]

Looking at that law...looks like a licence to print money for the lawyers, and just a bit scary.

What can you NOT be accused of ?

[Notavirusalso]

Looking at that law...looks like a licence to print money for the lawyers, and just a bit scary.

What can you NOT be accused of ?

so are you saying this law is wrong ? anybody can be accused of anything !
so whats you point ?

[grahamw48]

Eh ?