* Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The
ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.
* Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.
* A dyslexic man walked into a bra.
* A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm, and
says: "A beer please, and one for the road."
* Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this
taste funny to you?"
* "Doc, I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home."
"That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."
"Is it common?"
"Well, It's Not Unusual."
* Two cows are standing next to each other in a field.
Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning."
"I don't believe you," says Dolly.
"It's true; no bull!" exclaims Daisy.
* An invisible man married an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to
look at either.
* Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.
* I went to a seafood disco last week, and pulled a mussel.
* What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.
* Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the
other and says, "Dam!"
* Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a
fire in the craft. Not surprisingly it sank, proving once again that
you can't have your kayak and heat it too.
* A woman has twins, and gives them up for adoption. One
of them goes to a family in Egypt, and is named 'Ahmal.' The
other goes to a family in Spain; they name him 'Juan.' Years later,
Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon
receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she
also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins!
If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
:
* Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which
produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet.
He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd
diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him a super-calloused fragile mystic hexed by
halitosis.
* A dwarf, who was a mystic, escaped from jail. The call went out that
there was a small medium at large.
... BRILLIANT!
