well you are not the first and you will not be the last, take you time and take each day as it comes, try to keep busy and do not make contact with her at all,
well you are not the first and you will not be the last, take you time and take each day as it comes, try to keep busy and do not make contact with her at all,
Originally Posted by shinx
I know it will be hard shinx, but she obviously cheated and scammed you. We have a trusted member here, named mick, who had that same situation..well the difference is he married the scammer and then when he got back to UK, his wife went back to her bf and had a baby off him..then after giving birth she went to UK and obviously just used mick (of course without him knowing everything until someone informed him)..consider yourself lucky in escaping the situation quite easy.
-=rayna.keith=-
...When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible...
how could someone do these kind of thing?! how could they sleep after doing such a horrible thing?!and knowing a filipina like myself could do it.
it's really unforgiving to cheat and scam people.
i hope you will find a new girl and be happy because you deserve it
No amount of makeup can mask an ugly heart
Im sorry to hear that Shinx,I really hope that You both can fix Your relantionship....and if You both TRUELY love each other...surely You can fix it :-)....my advice for You,just be nice and kind no matter what and honest with Her.Give Her little bit time and space,She will calm down...that what I do when I have problem with my wife...and its working ;-)...good idea with flowers! Hopely we all will hear happy endning ;-)
Errr...have you read what he posted..his fiancee just gave birth to another guy's baby on September..she was cheating him and scamming him..
...When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible...
OOOOOOPPPPPSSSS!.....my mistake Raynputi,but I miss that part,thank You for cerrecting me :-) Hm...I try to be positive and encourage shinx,but in that case situation is more difficult for shinx.Alll best for Him.
thanks so much to all your effort to understand my side its the best i can figure from what I know to be true. i dont have the benefit of her side of it so becomes a kind of 'smoking gun'. If she would make effort to prove trust is still possible and continue that way my real love and care would not have been wasted because I am prepared but takes 2. And dont worry have from today my 'emergency' Diazepam and starting on the Fluoxetine
Probably best not to hear her side as it will probably be a pack of lies. Very sad to read your heartache and I hope you will be able to move on quickly.thanks so much to all your effort to understand my side its the best i can figure from what I know to be true. i dont have the benefit of her side of it so becomes a kind of 'smoking gun'. If she would make effort to prove trust is still possible and continue that way my real love and care would not have been wasted because I am prepared but takes 2. And dont worry have from today my 'emergency' Diazepam and starting on the Fluoxetine
allways two side to everything, but what you have said so far about your lady does not sound to good, like i have said try to stop all contact with her, it may be hard for you to do that but she has done it to you so just reverse the rolls, then in time it will get easy, we are all here to listen and help in someways,
my attempts at contact has stopped however the incredulousness of what has happened has not, my original image of her wont go away. its kind of should you really lose faith in human nature knowing that we all make mistakes and bad judgements and change over time. but granted this is almost too hard to forgive and now being replaced with just anger.
never lose faith on human nature, we are all differant, one day your worst nightmare the next your best friend, you are hurt and you cannot get the answers you want from the person who can give it too you, remember most of us on here have been burnt at one stage in our lives sometimes many times, we men are fools when it comes to love, but dont change that,if you are feeling angry now you have past the forgiving bit, just let the days roll by and soon you will know what has hppened has happened for the best, do not let this put you off the true ladies that are looking for you
thanks so much, she ticked all the boxes till now. so very very hard for me is why i hope to meet a filipina here now so we can take our time and easier to trust. fyi the flowers i sent were delivered yesterday received by her mom.
may i ask what age was she, and did her mum thank you for the flowers,
22, and yes I know huge difference but it was never apparent in the relationship because I am very young thinking and she mature in attitude in majority of things. our time together in Cebu was perfect. nothing from the mother tho she has my cell no.
time to move on mate, been there done that, life does get better look at us all on here
moving on yes agreed but will take me a little longer than just one week with this. ty so much all your support.
yes moving on is the best thing to do. remember everything happens for a reason so just be patient soon you'll find Ms. right
thank you Ana. I dont want to write too much more on this for danger of repeating but what I really cant cope with after 2 and a half years daily relationship sudden no contact, therefore no closure.
there is closure from her side it seems, most of the ladies who will read this thread have said what a rotter she is, that is what Ems has said also, you have been used so move on, she says it our it is,dont worry about repeating yourself on here or any other thread,
the thing I am trying so hard to resolve in my mind is how much of this did I bring on myself? why couldnt i figure this would happen as i do know girls sit and chat just for money and i have known them but to me Cindy was 100% different but look seems I was so wrong. its been said here there are good ones but however can anyone who commits ever be sure.
Hi shinx, I know its easy to say "move on with your life" but you will find time is a great healer, then you will be able to move forward, Good luck for the not to distant future!
its been said here there are good ones but however can anyone who commits ever be sure.[/QUOTE]
there are good ones, lots of them, its just the trust thing, i was talking to Ems for over 3 years before i went over to meet her, its down to beleiving in what you both tell each other, remember you are thousands of miles from each other, we all talk to differant people all the time, its knowing how far you want to take it, yes i know i am lucky but also Ems is lucky too,
UPDATE - i was thinking to close this thread but at 7am today Cindy contacted me, we had a discussion to see if its possible to move forward.
sure i can wish him goodluck but to me looks like too late if your girlfriend has baby with someone else ,like my friend is arriving in manila next week and his gf has decided to go abroad to work just before he arrives -only letting him know a week before -what you suggest -he follow her to that countrybloody hell irishman tell it how it is
a big mistake
...When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible...
appreciate your comments and yes its my feeling too but every situation is different - we must talk and I must hear her out or my love was not real
Hi Shinx,
This is Mick who rayna mentioned in her post.
I too loved my girl very much, love and trust go together in a relationship, I could not accept what I found was happening, she had the Filipino boyfriend long before our marriage, then disappeared for 4 months or so after with the money I had left her for her settlement visa and travel cost, that she told me she wanted to arrange herself.
She got back in touch with me when they had spent the money!
I did not know about the boyfriend she said she had left home because her father tried to take the money!
She came to the UK around 18 months after the wedding and a few weeks after giving birth, she slept on top of the bed in her cloths because she did not want me to see the scars from her caesarean birth I expect, she went home after 12 days saying she was too homesick.
Then when I said I would divorce her to set her free as even I knew by then she did not love me she said she wanted to return and make our marriage work, despite advice from friends here, I again paid for her to come back, after a few weeks she left and moved in with Filipino friends, she only ever wanted the money and visa so she could work in the UK and send money home to her boyfriend.
I found out about the baby from one of the Filipina friends she was living with because she was having an affair with her partner and she wanted her out the way.
I loved her and could not see what she was doing always wanting to give her the benefit of the dough.
I did divorce her, she remained in the UK after the settlement visa ran out but I believe is now back in the Philippines but have never been told by the UKBA.
The mental anguish she put me through was so great my employer made me take early retirement.
She had around £22.000 pound from me but the money was nothing compared to the mental torture from the many lies she told me.
You will do what you think best, but if she is lying to you please think hard.
Mick.
Hi Mick I dont know how you survived all that and truth is somehow you do but life does it to us doesnt it :( I wont allow that to happen to me as much as has to you for sure and thank you for sharing it. I know it can work if both are honest and sincere.I did not tell her I was undergoing a divorce when she and I started talking and she the one found out I was still technically married from the web. I know with Cindy she has a very hard daily life there and missed personal and is very young. She is not a bad person and its up to us to take a lot of time now to decide whats best for both of us. The guy involved was her Timeline pic for around a month this year then removed and in all her friends pages and his friends there was no 'smoking gun' comment or picture anywhere else about her. Only ever found one picture of them together anywhere. There is no guarantee in anything, all is a risk but you have to make decisions based on best information, the worst is not to make any decision at all and always wonder...
hi hello shinx,
I am so sorry to hear that..I hope you are ok ....xxxx
I am taking the tablets
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