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Thread: Why does no one care?

  1. #1
    Respected Member PeterB's Avatar
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    Why does no one care?

    As I walked to church yesterday evening, I crossed a park and noticed a young lady sitting on a bench - I'm not quite sure why I took notice, there was probably just something which made me think she was in need.

    An hour and a half later, as I was heading home again, she was still sitting there. I stopped to ask her whether she was okay. "No", she replied, bursting into tears. I found a clean handkerchief, and gave it to her to catch the drops. I asked what the problem was. "I want to die" was the response.

    As I continued to talk to her, I learned that she had walked about 5 miles (8 kms) to this park on the previous evening, and had been sitting there for almost 24 hours. She was 22 years old and her name was Laura. Her family wouldn't allow her to live at home, so she lived in a care home (mental care, I guess) but wasn't happy there so she had walked out. Apparently, I was the first person to have spoken to her in all that time.

    I was just wondering what I could do for her - contact her family who didn't want her, contact the care home where she was unhappy, would the police want to get involved, could I take her home? - when she volunteered the information that she had drunk some anti-freeze (for those from warmer climes, I should explain that anti-freeze is an alcohol-based mixture that is used in car cooling systems to prevent them freezing up during cold weather - it is poisonous).

    Well, that solved my dilemma - she needed to receive medical attention as a priority. I asked how long ago she had drunk it - she couldn't remember. I asked whether she had eaten or drunk anything else in the 24 hours - no, she hadn't. Would she come with me if I offered to take her to hospital? Yes, she nodded. I enquired whether the remains of the anti-freeze were in the plastic carrier bag at her side. "Yes", she replied.

    I took the bag, helped her to stand and supported her on the 15 minute walk back to my house. We were part way home when she muttered quietly: "I mustn't go with strangers." I tried to reassure her that I had no ill intent. When we reached the house, I suggested that she would feel safer not coming indoors, and could wait outside. She agreed, and sat on the ground. I went in the house only for long enough to lay down my hymn book, pick up the car key and open the garage door.

    I came back out - yes she was still sitting there. I got the car out of the garage, sat her in the passenger seat, and drove to the local A&E. When we arrived at hospital, I took Laura to the reception desk and explained the situation. The receptionist asked Laura for her name and contact details. Yes, she was already in the hospital records system. We sat and waited for a few minutes to be seen by a triage nurse. The nurse took vital obs, estimated the amount missing from the anti-freeze bottle and then asked me to leave the cubicle while she talked to Laura some more.

    I didn't see Laura again, but the nurse came to let me know that the amount of anti-freeze missing could be fatal, if drunk, and that Laura had been admitted for treatment. I asked for a phone number so that I could enquire after Laura's condition, and left mine, in case she might need a friend to talk to at some time in the future.

    What this poor girl needs, more than anything else, is for someone to love her. Why does no one care?


  2. #2
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    People do care!
    Unfortunately we now live in a world of power hungry do-gooders who will point the finger at anyone who tries to help. You are lucky you were not reported ar branded a stalker or worse.
    I like to help anyone, but when the so called defenceless hit you with a law suit for trying to help its gone too far.
    So yes we do care, many of us - but until we stop listening to the media and realise that having your name in print is not what lifes about, then we have to sit and watch and only hope that somehow it will all be ok.


  3. #3
    Respected Member Les_lady888's Avatar
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    [QUOTE]
    Quote Originally Posted by PeterB View Post
    As I walked to church yesterday evening, I crossed a park and noticed a young lady sitting on a bench - I'm not quite sure why I took notice, there was probably just something which made me think she was in need.

    That's always a familiar sight here in our country Pete....lots of beggars outside the churches and even in fastfoods.....Yes, everyone cares but the thing is......most people here are poor too and in need so how can they help??....It's too bad our government is not that equip to take good care of this indigent people....and as much as we want to help, we need to help first ourselves and our family


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    Peter,
    What a kind of you then. You did the right move and it's feel great to help others in need.


  5. #5
    Respected Member PeterB's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by barnsley-mark View Post
    I like to help anyone, but when the so called defenceless hit you with a law suit for trying to help its gone too far.
    Indeed, and just one of many reasons why I want out of this country!


  6. #6
    Respected Member PeterB's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=Les_lady888;32173][QUOTE]That's always a familiar sight here in our country Pete....lots of beggars outside the churches and even in fastfoods.....QUOTE]
    Sure, but this young lady was not poor, or a beggar - she just needed someone to care!

    I've just rung the hospital and, because I'm not family, they can tell me no more than the fact that she's in the Clinical Assessment unit, and is okay.


  7. #7
    Respected Member ervenescence's Avatar
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    Hi Peter, hats off to you for being a good samaritan.

    Well as like other said..we do all care but unfortunately we have this feeling that boggles in to our mind. You wouldn't realise that having a good intention to others will create a double meaning. Lets say for example.. for you, you only gave her water to drink because she was thirsty but then to others you already a perv, or lets say you offered her a shoulder to lean on but to others it was a harrassment.
    Its a crazy world, you know what I mean.
    But im pleased about the girl who you offered a help because she didn't protest or making a story up instead she participated despite being a mentally ill.
    There is always death and taxes; however, death doesn't get worse every year.


  8. #8
    Moderator joebloggs's Avatar
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    is this part of Thatcher's legacy? the greed of the 80's, selling everything off that was british, shutting things down, i think she called it 'care in the community' , or in other words, take care of yourself .. i'm sure that bed for mental care patients are at an all time low, even under labour shutting wards and hospitals down carries on. the city of salford is 800years old, and the gov has shut the maternity ward down at the local hospital, so there will be no more born in this city, to give birth women will have to travel many miles to the nearest hospital with a maternity ward, putting the mother and baby at more risk

    it's easy to fix a broken bone a doctor can see, but a broken mind .., and it's also near impossible to try to help someone who doesn't want help...

    what's wrong with society at the age of 22 someone given up on living..


  9. #9
    Respected Member Les_lady888's Avatar
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    Smile

    You are indeed a good samaritan Pete
    God bless you.


  10. #10
    Respected Member Mrs Daddy's Avatar
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    at least you care pete...
    to loved and beloved is the greatest joy on earth...


  11. #11
    Respected Member Pepe n Pilar's Avatar
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    Hi Pete,
    I'm proud of you! You're kind-hearted that you had to go out of your way just to help this 22 ys old lady. Here in my country we also have those kind but sometimes we have to be careful our life may be at risk. It happened to one of the lady here and when she did offer help and opened her purse to give some cash, she got surprised someone from her back took the purse and ran away, she went home thinking that it was just a trap.


  12. #12
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    I think there is a slight confusion here -- Peter seems to talk about England, not about the Philippines -- and the Filipinos/as think he talks about Philippines ...


  13. #13
    Respected Member PeterB's Avatar
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    A quick update:
    I visited the hospital and found that Laura had, indeed, been admitted. I went to the ward she was on, but was told that she was 'resting', so I decided not to trouble her.

    However, once I explained the reason for my interest, the nurse divulged much more information than she should!

    Laura's mother had been in to visit.
    Laura is being cared for.
    Laura had drunk the antifreeze but there is hope that no damage has been caused.
    Laura's mother was confused as to why my name and phone number had been written on the medical notes. The nurse will explain!


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    Years ago, while taxi driving in the middle of a rainy night, I came across a nasty accident.
    From the bits all over the place I soon realized that it was a Reliant Robin.
    Left my taxi car, sideways in the middle of the road, with all the flashers on, to warn oncoming traffic of the debris, and scouted around the place.
    Within seconds I found a body lying in the ditch, got him out very carefully and laid him on the kerbside, got my first aid kit out of my boot, and put some bandages on his head, to stem the blood. Called for an ambulance through my taxi two way radio, it seemed ages before it got there, real ages...
    To cut a long story short.... I got a rollocking from the cops that attended the incident, about 10 minutes after the ambulance left the scene... I should have not touched anything, only report it...
    AND I left myself open to lawsuits... if things went pearshaped with him... Because I was not trained in first aid. (incidentally I was, as the first rule in obtaining a german driving licence is to attend a first aid course....)
    About 3 months later, I meet the guy............ On crutches, with more steel pins in his bones than a magnet could cope with... Telling me that he wished that I had left him there to die...
    I was gobsmacked.
    Thanks for nothing M..... F.....


  15. #15
    Respected Member baboyako's Avatar
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    they had an interview on sky news a few days ago about the hotel fire in newquay.

    apparently the fireservice didn't have ladders, they had to come from 50miles away. so a neighbor got out his ladders & was going up to get a chap out who was choking at the window.

    what happened next?

    apparently the police tazered the guy, and needless to say the guy choking at the window had only one option left - to jump.

    needless to say he died.

    barking mad, better off without jobsworths like that


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    Thumbs up

    I might do the same thing you did.....as it happened to me before and helped an old lady lying on the street near to death....all i can say is.....you did the right thing peterb:-) cheersssss.....


  17. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by baboyako View Post
    they had an interview on sky news a few days ago about the hotel fire in newquay.

    apparently the fireservice didn't have ladders, they had to come from 50miles away. so a neighbor got out his ladders & was going up to get a chap out who was choking at the window.

    what happened next?

    apparently the police tazered the guy, and needless to say the guy choking at the window had only one option left - to jump.

    needless to say he died.

    barking mad, better off without jobsworths like that
    I would like to think the police officers were charged with assault and manslaughter for their stupid actions but as we speak they are properbly sewinng some stripes on as we speak to reward them for another up.


  18. #18
    Moderator fred's Avatar
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    Nice work Peter..
    In this day and age I think I would have called the Police as I would have assumed that the girl was taking drugs and carrying something sharp for protection?
    Thats the dilemma I suppose..
    The route of the problem may well lie with the "mother" but Im only guessing..
    Anyway..Well done,you should be proud of yourself.
    Here,the other day we saw ANOTHER Filipino lying in a jeep stop terminal,black with exaust fumes etc..My Mrs tried to put PHP50.00 in his hand as he was sleeping..My bro in law quickly stopped her as if she were a crazy woman!!
    I never really knew what to do for the best in these situations..I still dont.


  19. #19
    Respected Member Pepe n Pilar's Avatar
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    I know Peter is referring to England.. It is very clear. I am so proud that he did that.


  20. #20
    Moderator fred's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by itsme_iye View Post
    I know Peter is referring to England.. It is very clear.
    Yes..The anti freeze thing was the best clue..
    Not easy to find here...Just not the demand..
    Must be something to do with the climate.


  21. #21
    Respected Member PeterB's Avatar
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    LOL @ fred!

    But yes, I thought that should be a give-away!


  22. #22
    Respected Member PeterB's Avatar
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    I've been to the hospital a second time, but the nurse said that Laura was particularly distressed and it was better that I didn't visit her.

    However, Laura's mum phoned me to say how grateful she was that I'd taken the trouble to help - we chatted for more than 15 minutes. Laura has been suffering from mental/depression problems. Her current stay in the care home is intended to integrate her back into society.

    I've offered to keep in contact with Laura, if that would be of help in any way. Mum has my phone number, and I have hers!

    Oh, and being the same age as my son, Laura and he have school friends in common!


  23. #23
    Respected Member Alan's Avatar
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    Peter - I have read your story. I am proud of what you did - I think I would have done the same. However, the way the crazy laws operate these days you DID take a big risk.

    I have been a teacher now for over 25 years and I could have been sacked 100s of times. Why? Because I comforted children who were in distress!!

    Teachers are given a thorough Criminal Record check - they are trained to work with children - they are - according to their Contracts of Employment 'in loco parentis' - yet they are mistrusted in law.

    Hmmm - think I'll be a Traffic Warden instead.

    Al.


  24. #24
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    I am proud of what you did Peter. You were there for me also to listen and give me wise advice when I needed it. God bless your kind soul and yes we care a lot


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