its amazing really they have to ponder on asking you in the first place, what must they be feeling, then once they have asked its on your shoulders, what do we do, my god we feel so guilty if we dont but really if we do we may not get it back, WHAT DO WE DO, so you have to make your mind up after talking to your wife and your friends and the answer is NO, thats what you both agree and what is the advice from your friends too.
so you send the message sorry but the answer is NO, after a few days you find out that the rest of the family has said No too, so much for helping each other when they are there, now aint that funny after all the guilt you and your wife has been going through
