I Think I really need help!

[Terpe]

In my view this relationship is neither happy nor healthy.

I think it's best if you get out of it before it worsens

Please take some time to read the following useful information:-

Victims of domestic violence

Victims Of Domestics Violence - Requirements For Settlement Applications

Destitution Domestic Violence (DDV) Concession - FAQ's

Just be informed that UKBA state that:-

Domestic violence is any threatening behaviour, violence or abuse between adults who are or have been in a relationship, or between family members. It can affect anybody, regardless of their gender or sexuality.
The violence can be psychological, physical, sexual or emotional. It can include 'honour-based violence', female genital mutilation, and forced marriage.

[fred]

Just be informed that UKBA state that:-

Domestic violence is any threatening behaviour, violence or abuse between adults who are or have been in a relationship, or between family members. It can affect anybody, regardless of their gender or sexuality.
The violence can be psychological, physical, sexual or emotional. It can include 'honour-based violence', female genital mutilation, and forced marriage.

But do they say that women, suffering from this type of behavior from their coward, imbecile husbands may stBut do they say that women, suffering from this type of behavior from their coward, imbecile husbands may still get their ILR`s due to impossible circumstances?
Knowing Filipino women,they would put up with anything until they receive their ILR`s.. Seen it a few times.. Here we go again.

[limbowoman]

Thank you all for the replies will I be able to get the ILR even without his support?

[limbowoman]

But do they say that women, suffering from this type of behavior from their coward, imbecile husbands may still get their ILR`s due to impossible circumstances?
Knowing Filipino women,they would put up with anything until they receive their ILR`s..
Seen it a few times.. Here we go again.

Fred thats what he thought also Im just after the ILR, thats the reason why I wanna get it so i can prove it to him that he is not just for ILR, our marriage is just like a rollercoaster ride! 1 day we are ok 1 day we are not! and I understand why he became like that ! it is how he brought up! and I honesly swear I am not after for the ILR ofcourse i need to get it so i can stay here, how can i prove it to him that he is not just for the ILR thing if i will not get it! yes i will say mentally emotionally he abused me! I grew up in a very conservative family for us marriage is very sacred! its like you have to do everything just t save the marriage, im sure many filipina here can relate to this!

[sars_notd_virus]

thats what he thought also Im just after the ILR, thats the reason why I wanna get it so i can prove it to him that he is not just for ILR, our marriage is just like a rollercoaster ride! will say mentally emotionally he abused me!

wake up limbowoman ..check the links terpe has provided !!

...your husband has got a brain problem, why put up with it??

[limbowoman]

Thank you for all the replies . I will just give an update about my situation! last week my husband and I had an argument for the reason that I was not able to visit his mom, that morning he texted me and telling me that his dad been taken to the hospital bec of his knees! i was at the bank during that time sorting things out ! so I called his mom right away to ask how she was , and hows the hubby's dad, she said she was fed up and she told me the whole story! so i even told her that whatever she needs or if she needs me to come around just give me a call bec i was at the bank during that time ! so knowing his mom was alright I just carried on with my things for the day, cuz i had to meet a filipina friend for my driving lesson, so I did not go visit his mom during that time but I was waiting for him to come home so we can go there together and visit his dad also in the hospital! so when he came home he asked me right away what have ive been doing all day? i told him i was out with a friend for a driving lesson so he did not liked it and he got mad, he told me you went out with ur friend u did not even think visiting my mom and he kept on goin on and on! so i tried to explain and told him that i called his mom right away and i told him that I was waiting for him to come home so we can go together there! so he got mad more and he told me about the immigration thing again! so i told him that not right! i did not do anything bad ,I even told him sorry for not giving priority his parents cuz i had to do something also i have my problem too! so it was keep goin on and on till he blew up and tried to strangled me and wrenched my arms and dragged me downstairs! and he went to my filipina neighbor and told her to take me out of his house cuz im getting insane, so my friend called me and asked what happened so i told her the story and i told her talk to him and she said no I dont want to lets go to the police so the police will talk to him and calm him down! so we went to the police and told them everything! and they said thats an assault so they asked me if i want to file a complaint and they gave me few days to decide if I want them to arrest him, they gave me few days to decide ! so they took my statement and they asked me not to go back home just stayed with my friend! then the next morning the police called me and they told me that they will just invite my husband for a few questions! but after that I did not know that they arrested my husband and put him in a prison! but they released him bec lack of evidence ! like no marks no bruises, he denied it ofcourse, it did not come out that time though but in the morning my friend asked me to go to the doctor to examine me so when i went to the doctor I was not aware that I had swelling arms and bruises on my wrist! so my GP called and reported a domestic violence case right away,! and when my husband got back home from the middlewitch police station, he told me that my plan did not worked bec lack of evidence! and his family even mad at me now they did not asked me or my husband what happened and his mom told him just get a divorce! and the son treats me cold now and also his mom! so for sure he wont do anything for my ILR anymore! the women's aid offered me a full support though! my husband fight like a chile, he took me off the internet connection cuz he said that he's the one who is paying for it! he just let his son use the connection and even the landline phone he hides it and he just let his son also use the phone! right now the women's aid helping me to look for a place to live,but im not entitled for the house benefit bec of my visa! I just can not believe this things happening to me! I used to be very funny woman and bubbly! I give him so much love and affection evethough he was like that to me bec i saw it that he never got it from his parents! he got no empathy at all. and now he's telling his friends and his family that its my fault and i am a compulsive liar.

[limbowoman]

One more thing! I dont think that its just easy to say that will put up with it just to get the ILR thing ! only filipina that trully loves their husband I think can put up with that thing! bec if theres no love no one would be able to take it and stand it !

[Terpe]

But do they say that women, suffering from this type of behavior from their coward, imbecile husbands may stBut do they say that women, suffering from this type of behavior from their coward, imbecile husbands may still get their ILR`s due to impossible circumstances?
Knowing Filipino women,they would put up with anything until they receive their ILR`s.. Seen it a few times.. Here we go again.

Yes, they do.
It's all in the links provided.

If the applicant has moved out and is destitute (supported by third-party) then no fee is needed.

I also seen this kind of thing many times.
I'm currently involved in one right now with a friend of ours

[limbowoman]

In my view this relationship is neither happy nor healthy.

I think it's best if you get out of it before it worsens

Please take some time to read the following useful information:-


Victims of domestic violence

Victims Of Domestics Violence - Requirements For Settlement Applications

Destitution Domestic Violence (DDV) Concession - FAQ's

Just be informed that UKBA state that:-

Terpe thank you so much How will I apply my ILR! do i have to provide those bills on our names together? and fill up the form with him signing it ? i really dont know what to do! I need to submit my papers on June 1,2013 .

[Terpe]

Terpe thank you so much How will I apply my ILR! do i have to provide those bills on our names together? and fill up the form with him signing it ? i really dont know what to do! I need to submit my papers on June 1,2013 .

Read the links, everything you need is there.

[limbowoman]

Read the links, everything you need is there.

Hi again Terpe and thanks My husband never hurt me physically though , its all just words like degrading me calling me names putting me down and always looking a flaws in me in every way! is that part of domestic violence? just like now he is fine, he's talking to me , but i dont know if after few hours still the same, his mood swing is really terrible unpredictable!

[Terpe]

Hi again Terpe and thanks My husband never hurt me physically though , its all just words like degrading me calling me names putting me down and always looking a flaws in me in every way! is that part of domestic violence? just like now he is fine, he's talking to me , but i dont know if after few hours still the same, his mood swing is really terrible unpredictable!

Please read those links!!!
There's plenty of information that tells you that of course it's not always about physical abuse.
Unless you take some time to read and understand the help and support that's available you'll not progress your position.

Domestic violence is any threatening behaviour, violence or abuse between adults who are or have been in a relationship, or between family members. It can affect anybody, regardless of their gender or sexuality.
The violence can be psychological, physical, sexual or emotional. It can include 'honour-based violence', female genital mutilation, and forced marriage.