Sensitive Filipina

[London_Manila]

Hiya guys been married to my mahal now 15 months, living in the UK together 10 months, just want any input on the following:

Myself and my wife had a bit of a dispute about a week ago because she found out I had started smoking again

Anyway I turned it into more of a thing than it should of been mainly because I was caught out and felt that I had let myself down also that I had gone behind her back.

To make matters worse I told her to stop being a nagging b----h, well all hell was let lose and now she hasn't spoke for 5 days.

Well after that we started talking again but she said I had hurt her by calling her that and she would need time to get over it.

Honestly guys is this over the top or just normal behaviour is she that fragile and sensitive that this could offend her so much.

I am a good husband/father and a good provider but this seems over the top...

This kind of post reminds me of all the reasons why i would never get married again

I cant be doing with hissy fits anymore

Been there and done that and much prefer living alone

Freedom counts for a lot diba

[gWaPito]

This kind of post reminds me of all the reasons why i would never get married again

I cant be doing with hissy fits anymore

Been there and done that and much prefer living alone

Freedom counts for a lot diba

Absolutely LM ...I'd rep you again but, I'm all spent out

[Michael Parnham]

I've learned over many years with my ex is, if your angry just walk away for half an hour or go in the garden to just get out the way or start cleaning windows, you know what I mean and after a very short time everything should be fine!

[SimonH]

I've learned over many years with my ex is, if your angry just walk away for half an hour or go in the garden to just get out the way or start cleaning windows, you know what I mean and after a very short time everything should be fine!

I normally just pop down the pub for about 5 hours, by the time I get back I'm in a good mood and forgotten what the problem was

[grahamw48]

I normally just pop down the pub for about 5 hours, by the time I get back I'm in a good mood and forgotten what the problem was

...and if you're in luck she hasn't changed the locks and put your possessions on the front lawn.

[stevewool]

End of the day you did wrong,just like us men we try to get out of it by saying something stupid rather then sorry,in the end we say the magic word,sorry, and try to talk about it,we all have silly ways and names for each other but there are right ways of saying them too, I am very lucky in the 5 years there has never been tamponsorry tempo from Ems but lots from me, funny that

[grahamw48]

Welcome back Steve....with some wise words too.

[stevewool]

Welcome back Steve....with some wise words too.

Still on hols graham, I am waiting for Ems to get ready, we are just going walking around balleroy, enjoying the sunshine here with a nice cup of tea

[marksroomspain]

Well thngs are looking up we are on full speaking terms and sorting things out.

She tells me she loves me so much and I have said that in the future I will not act in haste but if a problem arises then we sort it before it escalates.

I asked if it would be ok to play some golf down in Spain with my mates for 5 days leaving Sunday, she gave me her blessing and said to me have a nice time.

[grahamw48]

Oh well....enjoy !

(Peeing it down here )

[stevewool]

That's made my day, raining there

[marksroomspain]

Oh well....enjoy !

(Peeing it down here )

Going down to Lanzarote Graham 30c

[grahamw48]

Hmm, my mates's got an apartment there.

[grahamw48]

I had to laugh when I went round to visit my best mate years ago.
He lived in a little terraced house with his girlfriend, and they had a bit of a 'tumultuous' relationship.

Anyway, I turned into the street, and noticed that all the parked cars seemed to be decorated with washing and other bits and pieces.

Turns out she'd caught him kissing another girl the previous night and had stormed off home and chucked all of his precious high fashion clothes and other stuff out of the bedroom window. He got in later and hadn't woken up and noticed anything yet.

[tone]

Having read all this I am really lucky as Rina is really chilled - she has to calm me down - really stressed at the moment as I started a new job last month and its right on top of me..
I've let go a couple of times and she just says she loves me and she knows its not me saying anything bad but just my stress.
Guess I am lucky and I know I am, she is one in a trillion and for all my failings she is there to pick me up.

I hope you get sorted mate - I know what its like to have a partner not talk to you for many days - my ex wife used to torture me with it.

Tone

[marksroomspain]

Having read all this I am really lucky as Rina is really chilled - she has to calm me down - really stressed at the moment as I started a new job last month and its right on top of me..
I've let go a couple of times and she just says she loves me and she knows its not me saying anything bad but just my stress.
Guess I am lucky and I know I am, she is one in a trillion and for all my failings she is there to pick me up.

I hope you get sorted mate - I know what its like to have a partner not talk to you for many days - my ex wife used to torture me with it.

Tone

One way or the other things will have to give, I only have so much tolerance then I do what I always do I walk away and let people fend for themselves.

A bit harsh but I have my own health and sanity to take care of.

You know what they say "There are plenty more fish in the sea"

And also people don't realise what they've lost till it's gone..

Cheers tone...

[grahamw48]

You ARE lucky Tone.

Take good care of her.

[tone]

You ARE lucky Tone.

Take good care of her.

Graham - seriously I help her a lot but its a two way street - she gave me an amazing Son and everyday I tell her what she means to me and how much I love her.
I started on the fags actually and just told her that I had started - she was a bit disappointed but she knows I'll drop them when I've overcome this stressful time.
Thanks though!

[sars_notd_virus]

To make matters worse I told her to stop being a nagging b----h

Good thing she didn't tell u to f..ck off......shes ain't no baitch!!

[Ako Si Jamie]

B1tch should only be used if she's done something to earn that title, like cheating for example.

[gWaPito]

B1tch should only be used if she's done something to earn that title, like cheating for example.

I wonder why the guy's sensitivity isn't taken into consideration here

You would of thought seeing how he's presumably changed the woman's life and family's for the better so, you would of thought there would of been more understanding on her part. ...I'm not talking about Mark's situation but, in general ....too much pussy footing around these supposedly fragile, delicate types for my liking

[Ako Si Jamie]

I wonder why the guy's sensitivity isn't taken into consideration here

You would of thought seeing how he's presumably changed the woman's life and family's for the better ( massive understatement ) you would of thought their would of been more understanding and gratitude on her part. ...not talking about Mark's situation but in general ....too much pussy footing around these supposedly fragile, delicate types for my liking.

Sounds like his partner is concerned about his health which is understandable and a sign of a good woman. Yup, it might be a bit annoying but if she's got his best interest's at heart, he can't knock her for it.

[marksroomspain]

I wonder why the guy's sensitivity isn't taken into consideration here

You would of thought seeing how he's presumably changed the woman's life and family's for the better ( massive understatement ) you would of thought their would of been more understanding and gratitude on her part. ...not talking about Mark's situation but in general ....too much pussy footing around these supposedly fragile, delicate types for my liking.

[gWaPito]

Cheers Mark

[grahamw48]

Hmm....'gratitude' is a tricky one Mark.

Are we assuming that we had nothing to gain from the relationship ?

I would tend to leave anything to do with 'what we have done for them' out of the equation.

[raynaputi]

Hmm....'gratitude' is a tricky one Mark.

Are we assuming that we had nothing to gain from the relationship ?

I would tend to leave anything to do with 'what we have done for them' out of the equation.

I think it's always unfair to think of the things that you have done for your partner to prove/say that he/she shouldn't have acted the way he/she did. Both have sacrificed things just for both of you to be together. It doesn't matter which one sacrificed or did more. If you are counting the things you did for your wife or husband, then why did you do it in the first place? Your marriage, or any relationship you have, will always be doomed if you keep on counting what you did for the other person.

In the case of markroomspain, he knew his wife wouldn't like it when he started smoking again and worse, he hid it until she caught him. What made things worst, he called her a "nagging *****" which was uncalled for. Did she have a valid reason why she had the "tampo" mode on? A big fat YES.

Filipinas, most often than not, have valid reasons why she goes on tampo mode. You just have to learn how to handle things properly just what Graham said.

[marksroomspain]

In the case of markroomspain, he knew his wife wouldn't like it when he started smoking again and worse, he hid it until she caught him. What made things worst, he called her a "nagging *****" which was uncalled for. Did she have a valid reason why she had the "tampo" mode on? A big fat YES.

I totally agree with you on that Rayna which I now duly appologised to my wife for.

What I do not and never will condone is physical violence whether man to woman or woman to man nor do I condone psychological or emotional or any type of abuse whatsoever.

I think this has been taking out of context the nagging b1tch, it can mean hardly nothing to somebody or really hurt somebody else, the way it was said to my wife was with no malice just as passing remark without offence even in terms of a pun hence the thread Sensitive Filipina.

I know for one thing my wife is a very emotional and takes things to heart as I now know, as we in the west would just laugh off but like I said we are still learning about each other and she knows my feelings and vice versa.

Once more we gain from each other through experiences like this and this does make us stronger.

Just my input Rayna...

[raynaputi]

I totally agree with you on that Rayna which I now duly appologised to my wife for.

What I do not and never will condone is physical violence whether man to woman or woman to man nor do I condone psychological or emotional or any type of abuse whatsoever.

I think this has been taking out of context the nagging b1tch, it can mean hardly nothing to somebody or really hurt somebody else, the way it was said to my wife was with no malice just as passing remark without offence even in terms of a pun hence the thread Sensitive Filipina.

I know for one thing my wife is a very emotional and takes things to heart as I now know, as we in the west would just laugh off but like I said we are still learning about each other and she knows my feelings and vice versa.

Once more we gain from each other through experiences like this and this does make us stronger.

Just my input Rayna...

I know what you mean Mark. I'm just saying that your wife had the reason why she felt that way. What I'm saying is most Filipinas having tampo is not something that we do just to annoy the husband/partner and to make them crazy. Because a lot of guys mistake it for something that is very negative. She had a reason why it happened.

I know you understand now that because your wife is sensitive, probably more than anyone else you know, thinking words over before you say it would be essential. And also, doing things behind her back should be prevented now.

[gWaPito]

Hmm....'gratitude' is a tricky one Mark.

Are we assuming that we had nothing to gain from the relationship ?

I would tend to leave anything to do with 'what we have done for them' out of the equation.

You are right of course, Graham. I've edited that post accordingly

[Michael Parnham]

So I assume you are smoking still, hope not Mark!