Magic Sandals

[grahamw48]

A married couple were on holiday in Jamaica . They were touring around the market-place looking at the goods and such, when they passed a small sandal shop.

From inside they heard the shopkeeper with a Jamaican accent say, 'You foreigners! Come in. Come into my humble shop.'

So the married couple walked in. The Jamaican said to them, 'I 'ave some special sandals I tink you would be interested in. Dey makes you wild at sex.'

Well, the wife was really interested in buying the sandals after what the man claimed, but her husband felt he really didn't need them, being the Sex God that he was.

The husband asked the man, 'How could sandals make you a sex freak?'

The Jamaican replied, 'Just try dem on, Mon.'

Well, the husband, after some badgering from his wife, finally gave in and tried them on.

As soon as he slipped them onto his feet, he got this wild look in his eyes, something his wife hadn't seen before!!

In the blink of an eye, the husband grabbed the Jamaican, bent him over the table, yanked down his pants, ripped down his own pants, and grabbed a firm hold of the Jamaican's thighs.

The Jamaican began screaming: 'You got dem on de wrong feet!

[Dedworth]

I thought from the title this was something to do with the Liberal Democrats

[grahamw48]

No....but since you're here Dedders...

Sorry for not calling you on New Years, I just got out of jail.
I got locked up for punching this bloke at a party.
In my defence... When you hear an Arab counting down from 10, your instincts kick in.

[Dedworth]

Nice one

[Terpe]

both

[fred]

Nice one Graham!!


Remember this old one?


This bloke was so deeply in love that just before he was married, he had his bride's name tattooed on his love muscle. Normally, only the first and last letters were visible, although when he was aroused, the tattoo spelled out W-E-N-D-Y.
Now they're on their honeymoon at a resort in Montego Bay. One night, in the men's room, this fellow finds himself standing next to a tall Jamaican at the urinal.
To his amazement, he notices that this man, too, has the letters W-Y tattooed on his penis. "Excuse me," he says, "but I couldn't help noticing your tattoo. Do you have a girlfriend named Wendy?" "No way, mon, I work for the Tourist board. Mine reads, "Welcome to Jamaica, mon. We have great beaches, great ladies, and great sun, mon! Have a nice day.'"

[grahamw48]

My two letters are R?

On very rare occasions it reads 'Remember this ?'

[fred]

My two letters are R?

On very rare occasions it reads 'Remember this ?'

I dont believe that for a second Graham.. I`m sure you are being your normal modest self!
What size shoes do you wear BTW?

[grahamw48]

11s ...except when I've got the flip flops .

[SimonH]

11s ...except when I've got the flip flops .

Just make sure they're not flop flips

[grahamw48]

[Arthur Little]

The Jamaican began screaming: 'You got dem on de wrong feet!

... buckling under de pressure, maybe?

[grahamw48]

Control yourself Arthur !