So this morning I was head of rank, could see a scrote further down trying to negotiate a bargain - driver was having none of it and sent him to me!

'How much to Rochdale Gadge?' were his words
He said he had £45 quid (100 mile round trip) I said £70 thinking that would get rid of him - but no he produced it and got in.

Set off, then I realised I needed extra fuel. So had the embarrassment of pulling into a filling station to top up

Took my keys with me so as to retain taxi

Anyway, continued journey and I said 'Were ya locked up for the night?' He answered 'yes how d'ya know?'

Was not his fault of course!

In these situations it's best to humour them coz with it being daytime I had no ahem implement if attacked (normally have a screwdriver)
Anyway he told me he did bit of this 'n' that involving drugs - nice.

As we got close he told me to forget my sat nav - he knows shortcut

Luckily we turned onto deluxe (not) ....-hole housing estate and he said wait there while I get some more money.

Now the obvious thing is to drive off but he wanted taking home from his mates and was gonna give me a tenner for short journey (helps with the Tiger slush fund)

He came back grinning with about 20 £20 notes in his hand!

Anyway got in took him to his destination whereupon he got out and said it's 'Coke Time' (I'm a pepsi man myself)

Got me extra dosh and sped home

This is always the type of job I tell others not to take on but as it was daytime I gambled and got away with it but that was an uneasy job - he looked handy.