Quote Originally Posted by jack86 View Post
Thankyou for your quick response.

I am in a bad place at the moment.

I spoke to my wife and she told me she was at a friends birthday party a week before we met and her ex was there she had a few drinks and fell asleep and the next day her ex was in bed beside her.

I asked did she consent to sex she said no because she hated him and that she never wanted to see his face again.

I pushed her on the issue and asked do you think you were raped she said it must of been because she would never sleep with him because she was in love with me even though we had never met she had developed deep feelings for me in the 9 months we spoke and video skped online.

To say I am in turmoil is an understatement

She is a good girl who attends church every week and never has giving me a cause for concern.

I have felt distant from her at intimate times and everytime we got close this thing was playing on her mind and slowly destroying her and the relief when I found through DNA was a massive relief for her cos every day she had wanted to tell me but was terrified to my reaction

I love her but it feels like the last 3 years has been a marriage based on fraud and deceit and feel utterly betrayed by it all, not because this happened but because she could not tell me and it feels like a lot of trust has vanished.

I know people will say I should man up and think of the pain and suffering my wife has gone through. Yes, I have and I see that look of desperation in her eyes and she says how much she must've hurt me.

I have told her I have to deal with this one day at a time and to get my head around it all and just hopefully be able to sort this out.

I love her so deeply and my little girl feels that little more special to me as it's not her fault and I am just glad that after seeing my solicitor that I am legally her father and nobody can ever change that.

Anyway, I have to go now but thanks once again for your kind words and support and even though talking to strangers it feels like a weight lifted off my chest. I just hope I can find peace and solace at the end of all this and hope to give an update.

Thankyou everyone...
Hopefully given time, you will move forward as a happy family unit Jack, don't waste what you've already built!