I do not know what to do now. I feel like I m in the middle of two big stones.
Here s the situation;
I have 2 children from my previous marriage and been separated for almost 10 years now. I have a British boyfriend, we been on for more than three years now. I accepted his proposal to marry me as soon as my annulment resolved. We agreed that I will go to UK, but my children will not come with me, because, first, their biological father will not let them and second my BF as he said he can not afford to support me and my children if I will bring them to UK.
I know that is sounds awful and how bad mother I am to leave my children and fly to UK to be with my man. But if I didn’t meet him I would probably work abroad to support my children until they finish their college. I m so worry now, as recently we have arguments about giving support for my children when I get to UK.
This will be the arrangement when I get to the UK.
He said he, will give me xxx pounds for personal allowance and also xxxxx pesos to send to my children. And I m happy with this arrangement.
But how many times now we had a rows over that issue and I have the impression that he is really not happy to support my children. I told him that the moment I will get a job I will send money for my children and then therefore he does not need to worry about my children.
I understand that he is not rich, he received an average income, but he is not broke. He is single and childless. I understand that he does not want to move here to the Philippines because as he said, he can not give up his job and his security over the uncertainties here in the Philippines.
I am jealous to those Filipinas who have their husband here live together with her children.
One more thing that worries me is, he confessed to me that he did one time went to the massage parlor and had sex with the other girl. He was force to confess to me because at first, he thought that he got his infection from me, then I told him that is a big insult to me as I never had sex with other man , so apologized and I forgave him, he got cured from that mild infection though. I m just worry that , what if this happen again, what if he s been doing that thing before, what if he still do it even I m around. I know I have to give him my full trust, but that unfaithfulness linger in my mind especially whenever we have rows, because he told me that , that he did those because he was so upset to me.
I wonder if I m too demanding to him about the support for my children, is it unfair for him? Shall I continue this relationship or give him up. I know it hurts me so much to let him go and I do not want to hurt him, too. I do not want to lose him, but I do not want to be unfair for my children. I know that if I will continue this, my dream to have a happy and complete family will not come true. I always dream that one day, I have a family, me, my children, my man and the future child/children. I love him so much but I love my children, too.
Any opinion and advice will be appreciated.
Thank you very much.
