help! i'll meet my BF in December (happy&afraid)

[bigtombowski]

wonderful

[Bridget]

Hi Honey_C,
You just met your BF online and you know him for only 3 months.
I understand your fears of having a pre-marital sex with him.
I think the best is have a chat with him.
Maybe start the conversation by asking him what are his expectations of coming here.
Ask him, about the plan, the holidays, the sleeping arrangements, if you are going to sleep in one room, how many beds. You have all the right to tell him your fears and have all the right to say NO if you are not happy with the arrangements. Remember that in any relationship honesty is the best policy. Do not worry, if he will get upset or you may lose him. In fact telling him your fears will make him feel that you fully trust him.
If you are not yet ready, true love waits. By telling him your worries and your beliefs you are just showing him that you are a smart girl, but Im not saying that those girls who have sex with their BF are not smart, if that is their choice and happy to do it they just being honest to themselves as well, everybody is different.
No one can make a choice for you or can make a decision for you. It is your life and what you do today you will be the one who will suffer or will be happy with the consequences in the future.
I said you are smart in a sense that you will not do anything against your principles just to please him. Love should be a two way street, in everything you do or share with each other must be for the happiness and fullfillment of both side.
If you do have trust yourself I mean having self control, you have nothing to worry even if he says," Ok no problem, even we do not make love, but we will share one bedroom". Just make sure do not get yourself drunk if you do sleep in one bedroom. Alcohol tends to get you warm and also avoid foods contains oyster sauce and spicy stuffs as they say those make you horny,,,
And also avoid to wear seductive clothes, because it will be to much torture for your BF seeing you in your sexy clothes but he can`t have you or even touch you.
Sex is really just a mirror for us- a mirror that reflects the state of our mind, our heart and our soul.
Goodluck and enjoy your holiday.