Settling in UK

[GAZZ528]

Hi
I am new here, I am Gary, my wife is Filipino and she is struggling to adjust to life here in the UK. We live in Chester, Cheshire which is in the North West of England. I am writing here for advice really as to how to help the transition to life here in the UK easier for my wife. I am also interested to here from any filipino females in this area who are looking for friends.

The above situation is putting a strain on our relationship, we both love each other, but it is difficult for her to cope. She uses skype to talk to her family in the daytime but this is not always enough, especially if I am away working on day or night shifts and she is alone in the house.

Hoping this situation can be eased soon and she will feel happier.

Thanks.


Gary

[GAZZ528]

Hi

My filipino wife is looking for friends and contacts here in England. We live in Ellesmere Port, Chester, Cheshire. Please reply if you are interested in making contact.

Thanks

Gary and Mary Ann

[Steve.r]

Gazz, you are a Staff Nurse, then surely you have some Filipino nurses in your hospital

[Terpe]

Best places to find kababayan are hospitals, care homes and Catholic Churches in your area.

As Steve mentions it's surprising none in your hospital.

Good luck and welcome aboard Filipino UK

PS
I merged your posts

[Michael Parnham]

How long has your wife been in the UK Gazz also what part of Philippines is she from?

[grahamw48]

Attending classes at a local college helped my ex to settle in. Then she also started working. Nothing worse than them being left alone and lonely in the house all day.

[raynaputi]

Hubby's cousin lives in Ellesmere Port and we sometimes visit them.

[Anne2014]

Welcome to the forum, Gary. Hope your wife could find Filipino friends in your area. I did find a number of Filipino friends at a Catholic church here in South West of England

[Arthur Little]

, Garry ... and best wishes to Mary Ann in her search for fellow kabayan.

[jonnyivy]

My wife moved here 10 years ago into my small cottage in a hamlet of 10 houses out in the country.

She took a few months to settle in, I worked days as a gardener and popped home every now and then during the day. I did find her once crying in silence in the hall because she missed her mum, but a nice warm cuddle and a bit reassurance made her feel better. My wife knew what she wanted from life...to get out of the Phils, get married and have kids. This is exactly where we are today, very happy, 2 kids. Moved to our house in the town and my wife works now too.

I know she still misses her mum and sisters and looks forward to her times on skype with them each week. We haven't been over to see them at all this year - or last - but my wife doesn't seem to be bothered as she now fully understands how difficult it is to make ends meet even with us both working and realises that it could be a few years till we can afford to go back over for a visit.

My wife made lots of friends in our area, mainly because of her manners and polite happy personality,..we still don't have any other Filipinos in our sleepy borders town !!..

Jonny

[Terpe]

My wife moved here 10 years ago into my small cottage in a hamlet of 10 houses out in the country.

She took a few months to settle in, I worked days as a gardener and popped home every now and then during the day. I did find her once crying in silence in the hall because she missed her mum, but a nice warm cuddle and a bit reassurance made her feel better. My wife knew what she wanted from life...to get out of the Phils, get married and have kids. This is exactly where we are today, very happy, 2 kids. Moved to our house in the town and my wife works now too.

I know she still misses her mum and sisters and looks forward to her times on skype with them each week. We haven't been over to see them at all this year - or last - but my wife doesn't seem to be bothered as she now fully understands how difficult it is to make ends meet even with us both working and realises that it could be a few years till we can afford to go back over for a visit.

My wife made lots of friends in our area, mainly because of her manners and polite happy personality,..we still don't have any other Filipinos in our sleepy borders town !!..

Jonny

Thanks for sharing your experience Jonny

I'm sure that will reassure many.

[grahamw48]

+ 1.

What a lovely positive post.

[Dedworth]

+ 2 positive confidence boosting

[jonnyivy]

It will work out and it does work out ,..in my opinion it,s mostly down to how you treat your wife or g/f ,..not the way you treat her in the Phils,....but the way you treat her when you pull her away from her family and surroundings. a lot of these girls want something better from life,...just ask yourself ,..are you giving her something better ?,...not just money , gifts and clothes,...but the comfort and stability of a loving husband who will provide for her. Remember most will have given up their family and simple way of life to be with you and try her best to please you in every way.
Go on,...turn around and give her a cuddle right now and appreciate what they have done to make your life more complete.
Merry Christmas to you all....

Jonny

[Terpe]

It will work out and it does work out ,..in my opinion it,s mostly down to how you treat your wife or g/f ,..not the way you treat her in the Phils,....but the way you treat her when you pull her away from her family and surroundings. a lot of these girls want something better from life,...just ask yourself ,..are you giving her something better ?,...not just money , gifts and clothes,...but the comfort and stability of a loving husband who will provide for her. Remember most will have given up their family and simple way of life to be with you and try her best to please you in every way.
Go on,...turn around and give her a cuddle right now and appreciate what they have done to make your life more complete.
Merry Christmas to you all....

Jonny

Well said Sir

For a number of years I became involved in more cases than you might imagine where the wife did not find that stable loving life they counted on after arriving in the UK.

Your words will hopefully be a help and inspiration to all who read

Merry Christmas Jonny

[Michael Parnham]

It will work out and it does work out ,..in my opinion it,s mostly down to how you treat your wife or g/f ,..not the way you treat her in the Phils,....but the way you treat her when you pull her away from her family and surroundings. a lot of these girls want something better from life,...just ask yourself ,..are you giving her something better ?,...not just money , gifts and clothes,...but the comfort and stability of a loving husband who will provide for her. Remember most will have given up their family and simple way of life to be with you and try her best to please you in every way.
Go on,...turn around and give her a cuddle right now and appreciate what they have done to make your life more complete.
Merry Christmas to you all....

Jonny

Very well put Jonny, love it, love it, love it

[raynaputi]

It will work out and it does work out ,..in my opinion it,s mostly down to how you treat your wife or g/f ,..not the way you treat her in the Phils,....but the way you treat her when you pull her away from her family and surroundings. a lot of these girls want something better from life,...just ask yourself ,..are you giving her something better ?,...not just money , gifts and clothes,...but the comfort and stability of a loving husband who will provide for her. Remember most will have given up their family and simple way of life to be with you and try her best to please you in every way.
Go on,...turn around and give her a cuddle right now and appreciate what they have done to make your life more complete.
Merry Christmas to you all....

Jonny

Great words! A lot of guys think that just because they pulled their wives/gfs out of the "misery life" in the Philippines, it means that they've given everything and a "better life". They fail to think at times that in that misery life, the wives/gfs would always (most of the time) have their family and friends by their side and the comfort of that has been removed once they arrive here in the UK (or other parts of the world).

[grahamw48]

Nicely put, and so true.

Merry Xmas and a Happy New Year to you and your family.

[bigmarco]

2 good posts there Jonny with wise words.

[grahamw48]

Too many inadequate or control freak guys looking for some sort of compliant slave to bully.

These sort of despicable lowlifes need kicking into touch ASAP.