New to site

[Michael Parnham]

Paul? ... I thought the bloke you've responded to was called
Harry!

, Michael ... I don't mean to nitpick ... just curious.

I checked his profile Arthur!

[rhosalie]

Hi John, welcome to the forum

My husband is from Derby as well, I agree on you it takes a lot of effort when your loved one is living on the other side of the world, And there are also some other people adds up on this hurdle. People who at first judge the relationship. BUT when you finally end up together, you'll just say that everything is worth it and you can already give your middle finger to them.

We are only waiting for the marriage certificate and we are good to go to lodged our Spouse Visa Application hopefully next week. We had an intimate civil ceremony 6th of February of this year so that we can already start with the paper works for the spouse visa, Hubby and his whole family will be arriving again on the 3rd week of April for the Blessing (garden wedding). And we're crossing our fingers that the visa result will be release on time before hubby goes back to UK again.

Just go back here from time to time and for sure you will learn a lot in regards of your endeavor. That's what we did when we apply for the tourist visa last year. A lot of bloke here will surely give a big help.

[Harry T]

Paul? ... I thought the bloke you've responded to was called
Harry!

, Michael ... I don't mean to nitpick ... just curious.

For everyones info its actually first name Paul, middle name Harry, but in so far as Im known on here, either will do.

[Ako Si Jamie]

LM, Obviously you have been hurt by what happened to you, do you care to share some of the Pitfalls and Hassle that members may face, obviously John would like to know the downside as well as the Garden of Roses, that doesnt always happen.

Yup. It would be interesting to hear LM's story.

[Rosie1958]

Welcome to the Forum John! I hope that you participate in some of the forum conversations as it's always great to have new members around

Also fab to see a newbie displaying a profile pic as it's an indication that they plan to stick around, well done!

[Arthur Little]

For everyones info it's actually first name Paul, middle name Harry, but in so far as I'm known on here, either will do.

Ah ... Paul Harry ...

[Ako Si Jamie]

It is imperative that the initial daydreaming is backed up by visits to the prospective partner's country so that a REAL understanding of their culture and values is acquired.

That would be my best advice to a 'newbie'.

Yep. And acting like a kiddie in a sweet shop isn't advisable either.

[Ako Si Jamie]

I think the best advice I can give to a 'Newbie' is to treat this process like a business deal, initially. It does sound crass I know but ultimately the person you're meeting is a total stranger who you can only trust over a significant period of time. Getting too emotionally involved early on can be a recipe for disaster if she's the wrong type because she will use that vulnerability to her advantage. I do think men who have experience of scheming women have a distinct advantage than those who haven't because they can work them out quicker, so long as they have their head screwed on.

At the end of the day don't make yourself an easy target by sending money, showering her with gifts ,and getting emotionally involved too early like I said previously. Be cool, calm and collected. Don't buy her. Don't come across as too eager or desperate. Don't be afraid to say no to her. Get her respect. Don't put outer beauty before inner qualities. A real woman will love you for who you are, not what's in your wallet.

The bottom line is she has to earn that right for you to put a ring on her finger and that takes time but then again Rome wasn't built in a day. Ultimately, rushing this process and becoming blasé in what could be one of the most important decision's of one's life is a bit like flipping a coin. Heads you win, tails you lose.

[London_Manila]

I think the best advice I can give to a 'Newbie' is to treat this process like a business deal, initially. It does sound crass I know but ultimately the person you're meeting is a total stranger who you can only trust over a significant period of time. Getting too emotionally involved early on can be a recipe for disaster if she's the wrong type because she will use that vulnerability to her advantage. I do think men who have experience of scheming women have a distinct advantage than those who haven't because they can work them out quicker, so long as they have their head screwed on.

At the end of the day don't make yourself an easy target by sending money, showering her with gifts ,and getting emotionally involved too early like I said previously. Be cool, calm and collected. Don't buy her. Don't come across as too eager or desperate. Don't be afraid to say no to her. Get her respect. Don't put outer beauty before inner qualities. A real woman will love you for who you are, not what's in your wallet.

The bottom line is she has to earn that right for you to put a ring on her finger and that takes time but then again Rome wasn't built in a day. Ultimately, rushing this process and becoming blasé in what could be one of the most important decision's of one's life is a bit like flipping a coin. Heads you win, tails you lose.

Great advice but as you know already some guys lose the plot big time when they fall in love and take their eye off how much money they are parting with

[London_Manila]

Yup. It would be interesting to hear LM's story.

Went to Thailand when I was 16 married a Thai women at age 20 she came to the UK and at the age of 30 we got divorced. I never supported her family in Thailand and the divorce cost me nothing apart from the legal fees. I feel I got away lightly........

Immigration in Bangkok were a nightmare to deal with so many visits and interviews
We were married in April but they would not grant a settlement visa until October
At that time being only 20 it cost me a fortune
Thai's are nice people but very different to people in the western world