Ok so even for the ILR, we would still have to be together then? We're looking at the second FLR now. I thought before once you get past the second FLR, spouse could probably get the ILR even if separated as will be over 5 years by then. ..

No not planning to 'cheat' but lets say I'm getting some pressure to do so. Right now I want to know what alternatives I have - and it sounds like I only have two: cheat, or she's going home.