Quote Originally Posted by lordna View Post
Hi Sally,

Sorry to hear of the loss of your husband. I decided to respond as I too was in similar circumstances to you back in spring 1999 when my first wife was diagnosed with Breast Cancer, given 6 months to live and passed away in January 2002. Life seemed very empty and it took me about 7 years to fully get over it. Perhaps i was fortunate in that i had three children to look after, so perhaps this helped me keep my sanity during what was a very difficult time. The local hospice who helped care for my wife did also offer counselling and other help for myself and my children which helped enormously as did me attending counselling session arranged by my local GP. Keeping myself busy and distracted with looking after the kids, finding a new hobby (family history) and improving the house also helped a lot. Eventually(2009), i decided it was time to seek another partner, something i never thought i would do, which led me to online dating and meeting my current filipina wife and her daughter. They joined me in the UK in 2010 and so far life is good again.
I think for you it's early days yet as IMHO you need time to get over losing your partner. In my case we had been together 22 years. My advice to you would be don't rush, it takes time. Find a hobby you always wanted to try that brings you into contact with other people perhaps. Ask for help at the local hospice or your GP. In time your life will heal itself and you will clearly see which direction your life should be heading, be it here or back home in the Philippines. Good luck and welcome back to the forum.
Thank you Lordna!

Glad to hear and know that you were able to pull through with that difficult and painful chapter of your life and was given chance to experience happiness again with your current wife and her daughter. I wish I would have that chance too. It may be too early to say but finding a new partner, now or in the future is i think a remote possibility for me. i've been reading and came across with the story of this woman who lost her husband saying "if you were treated with kindness and so much love by your husband, even the thought of finding a new love would never enter your mind". i guess that goes for me too. like Keith, i have remained single for a long time even before we met online that's why i grieve so much for the love and life we were suppose to have with each other. To be honest, I never considered attending a counselling session but I might now. This might pave the way for me to overcome my grief and meet people who are in the same situation as mine and hopefully the load i'm carrying now would lighten. Thanks Lordna for this advice and for the welcome!