To all SINGLE Filipina Ladies

[Mrs.JMajor]

l. If you at some point in time got scammed, I will bet it was a city girl - meaning a girl from one of the big cities like Cebu or Manila area.

Oh-uh lol ,you make me laugh arent you,?wait for some city girl reply on you hahaha

[sysop]

Oh-uh lol ,you make me laugh arent you,?wait for some city girl reply on you hahaha

hehe nah not really ..... just my experience, that's all. Life in the cities are different than in the suburbs or "remote" places, so people there have to be more street smart to survive. I understand it perfectly, I just don't approve about it - especially when it goes out on me

[mommyhere]

Being man and wife should always be about "sharing" even in UK, in the Phils.. or anywhere else...

I could share with anything, money, house maintenance, bills etc..if I have job or resources to get it from, if not then i could share with budgeting and chores, or simply being a responsible partner to start with..

about sending money to ur homeland families, ..oh well it depends on the urgency and needs, but it should come with a serious, honest, and realistic discussions and arrangement between the partners, but it should be dealt with both parties, wth willingness and most of all with limitations..especially if there are kids to consider and prioritize.

it's simply about sharing...
EXCEPT... except the toothbrush and the undies...

[mommyhere]

I believe studying the language and learn some basic phrases (magandang gabi, kumusta kana, and the most important 'mahal na mahal kita') can bring you closer to the lady......

errmm.. not only that..you have to embrace their traditions, culture including the food and how they eat...oh well..the least is 3 x a day, more often its 5 times a day..

Anyone here who was able to watch the film.."My Big Fat Greek Wedding" ???

there are lots of similarities the way we share and enjoy food while being with the whole family and eating loads and loads, as if there will be no tomorrow..kinda amusing, but that's how we do our "family bonding" moments here and of course not to forget the availability fo the videoke:9::9: and san miguel beer, red horse, or Tanduay rhum or Ginebra San Miguel..:

and everybody is a WINNER!!!!

[MarBell379]

it's simply about sharing...
EXCEPT... except the toothbrush and the undies...

She told me it was all right to share her undies.
Now you tell me its wrong????

They're so comfy!!

[Tawi2]

I believe studying the language and learn some basic phrases (magandang gabi, kumusta kana, and the most important 'mahal na mahal kita') can bring you closer to the lady......

Good man Pacific,try and learn the basics,one day it just clicks and all the pieces of the puzzle slot into place,you actually understand what the people are saying Live with a family for a few months if you really want to immerse and understand the culture

[Mrs.JMajor]

Good man Pacific,try and learn the basics,one day it just clicks and all the pieces of the puzzle slot into place,you actually understand what the people are saying Live with a family for a few months if you really want to immerse and understand the culture

Thats what your doing eh,

[Tawi2]

Best way to learn about a culture is to bathe in it,figuratively not literally I did the same in Pakistan and China,you cant really learn about a culture unless you live as part of it,but Pacific is taking the first steps in learning the language

[jam07]

Doesn't want to visit you - If they are not gagging to get to you ASAP, dump them. They lack the passion for your relationship.

what if the guy wants you to visit him instead (all under his expenses), is that an issue?

[Tawi2]

If the guy wants the woman to visit him things get a little more tricky,because 9 times out of 10 there would be stipulations attached to the trip,I know 2 ladies who came to Europe on such stays,both thought it was going to be the precursor to a long and happy married life,both are now languishing back in pinas wondering where it all went wrong

[jam07]

If I should mention bad things, then hmmm...... well, it is my own experience that "city girls" are the ones to look out for. They are a tiny bit too street smart for my taste. If you at some point in time got scammed, I will bet it was a city girl - meaning a girl from one of the big cities like Cebu or Manila area.

hey, I'm from the city and i dont do those things.
I would never play at anyone's feeling for money.

I guess my parents brought us up well...

[bystander09]

A few more thoughts to add to my post yesterday, directed to the ladies. I find that many Filipinas have a belief that their "needs" will all be taken care of by their husband. He will pay all the costs for housing, food, transport, clothing etc etc from what he earns. Of course, if you are a full time housewife, looking after the home and kids, then that is true. However that is a rarity in the UK these days. Most couples both have to work just to pay their bills and lead a reasonable life style. Nevertheless many Filipinas feel that what they can earn is "theirs" and that they can do whatever they wish with it, normally sending most of it back to their various family members. This can cause conflict. You are not an OCW here just to work and remit. You are a wife and you must take an appropriate share of the living costs of you and your husband. There may not be very much left to send back. Thats' the way it is here now so you had also best be prepared for it.

This is so true.. Some Filipinas with thier UK husbands do have trouble shaking the OCW syndrome. They have difficulty accepting the concept of shared responsibility for cost of living expenses.

Are Filipina wives for real..??? Or do they consider a UK husband as an overseas opportunity/employer?? The ongoing goal will be to support the family back home.. Yes indeed, when they work, their salary is for the folks back home.. The poor UK hubby is just to cover the day to day expenses in the UK..

bystander

[IainBusby]

A few more thoughts to add to my post yesterday, directed to the ladies. I find that many Filipinas have a belief that their "needs" will all be taken care of by their husband. He will pay all the costs for housing, food, transport, clothing etc etc from what he earns. Of course, if you are a full time housewife, looking after the home and kids, then that is true. However that is a rarity in the UK these days. Most couples both have to work just to pay their bills and lead a reasonable life style. Nevertheless many Filipinas feel that what they can earn is "theirs" and that they can do whatever they wish with it, normally sending most of it back to their various family members. This can cause conflict. You are not an OCW here just to work and remit. You are a wife and you must take an appropriate share of the living costs of you and your husband. There may not be very much left to send back. Thats' the way it is here now so you had also best be prepared for it.

This is so true.. Some Filipinas with thier UK husbands do have trouble shaking the OCW syndrome. They have difficulty accepting the concept of shared responsibility for cost of living expenses.

Are Filipina wives for real..??? Or do they consider a UK husband as an overseas opportunity/employer?? The ongoing goal will be to support the family back home.. Yes indeed, when they work, their salary is for the folks back home.. The poor UK hubby is just to cover the day to day expenses in the UK..

bystander

I think that the problem for many is that their families back in Phils see them as OFW's from whom remittances are not just hoped for but expected. I have noticed however, from various posts that I have read on this forum, that although most of the newley arrived Filipina wives always seem to accept this situation, there seem to be a big difference of attitude with the wives that have been here for 5 years or longer. It seems that over a period of time living in the UK, a sense of reality starts to creep in.

Iain.

[eleazebonares]

You are all beautiful women (well apart from the ones with a moustache ), and have the upbringing and respect that many UK guys would kill for (hopefully not the present wife to win you over ).

If you haven't found anyone yet, or recently split up, don't worry, time WILL find you someone.

Remember this though, you are the prize that has us guys running to the Philippines to grovel before you, this means you have the upper hand. YOU are in control. If the guy doesn't fit into exactly what YOU want for the rest of your life, move on, the one for you will be along soon after.

Some things that can mean it's the worng guy:

Arguing with you - This is a no no. Small tiffs yes, but not constant arguing, that is NOT happiness, and can lead to resentment & relationship failure.

Always going on about money - Not a good sign at all. If the guy has problems now, he WILL not be able to support you as you should be supported.

Doesn't want to visit you - If they are not gagging to get to you ASAP, dump them. They lack the passion for your relationship.

I'm sure the guys on here can add more advice.

amen! !

[Queenbee]

You are all beautiful women (well apart from the ones with a moustache ), and have the upbringing and respect that many UK guys would kill for (hopefully not the present wife to win you over ).

If you haven't found anyone yet, or recently split up, don't worry, time WILL find you someone.

Remember this though, you are the prize that has us guys running to the Philippines to grovel before you, this means you have the upper hand. YOU are in control. If the guy doesn't fit into exactly what YOU want for the rest of your life, move on, the one for you will be along soon after.

Some things that can mean it's the worng guy:

Arguing with you - This is a no no. Small tiffs yes, but not constant arguing, that is NOT happiness, and can lead to resentment & relationship failure.

Always going on about money - Not a good sign at all. If the guy has problems now, he WILL not be able to support you as you should be supported.

Doesn't want to visit you - If they are not gagging to get to you ASAP, dump them. They lack the passion for your relationship.

I'm sure the guys on here can add more advice.

LOVE THIS!!!!BOSS UR AMAZING,U TRULY KNO wHAT wOMEN wANT!

[bornatbirth]

LOVE THIS!!!!BOSS UR AMAZING,U TRULY KNO wHAT wOMEN wANT!

[Queenbee]

lol .... this thread keeps bumping

I think the original post was something about why filipinas are the best.

Well, here's my shot; they are loving, caring (though they worry to much) and when they first have decided that you "belong" to them, then nothing on earth (or in hell) can change their mind. They always make you believe, that whatever decisions have been made, it was all yours. They would almost never talk about you behind your back - and in case they do, trust me, it will be good things only (unless you're a pig, but then again you wouldn't have taken the time or have the knowledge to register here).

If I should mention bad things, then hmmm...... well, it is my own experience that "city girls" are the ones to look out for. They are a tiny bit too street smart for my taste. If you at some point in time got scammed, I will bet it was a city girl - meaning a girl from one of the big cities like Cebu or Manila area.

UMMM sorry bout being scammed but im a city girl meanin from Cebu and have worked abroad, got a good education and brought up real well by my family...I think its really unfair to judge women like me who grew up from big cities...Please dnt strereotype all the women from big cities as we dont stereotype old n young foreign guys just marry women from Asian countries to make them their slaves...

I think it depends on her background n the way she was brought up...Maybe she jst made the wrong choices in life...
peace!

[Queenbee]

, not my misses, she works, she gives me most of her wage( for now anyway) to help pay the bills, and yes some of the money goes back to the phils to get my stepson thru uni, also to get her cousin thru uni, and to help her aunt out, which i'm more than happy and willing to pay,even thou sometime it leaves us with little left.

and i'm hoping soon she will be giving me money to spend , its not my money or her money, its our money.. and in near 6yrs we have done whats best for us and her family in the phils, without one big argument

YOU'RE A GOOD HUBBY JOE!!

[Tish]

I too was brought up in the city, and would never dream of doing such things to others

But for every scammers out there, there's always one to be scammed, so make sure not in any

Tish

[steadyfornow]

Ladies, I think what the boss said is right

Here's my take.

Arguing: A good relationship needs a good foundation. Arguing and 'trying to hold it together' at the start is not a good foundation. ...time to run!

Money: Any man who is serious will have an idea of how much he will have to spend to pull it off. Some guys will be sailing pretty close to the wind but that doesn't mean they can't support you. Being careful with money shouldn't be taken as a sign he is broke... maybe he's just being sensible which should be seen as a quality. However, if he's struggling financially to make the first trip to PI... he ain't got a hope of funding the rest.

Doesn't want to visit: Yes, he should be gagging to get to you... and you should feel the same. Also, a relationship naturally has to move forward or it will starve. However, you do need to consider his work commitments. Don't assume he can drop everything, fly half way round the world, so you can leap into his arms like the scene in Armageddon! Personally, I would ask right at the start with all the other questions... but tactfully.. like, 'if he met a girl he liked, would he visit her and when?'. If he answers 2/3 months for example, hold him to it, then if he starts making excuses .... time to run!

Good luck to you all

the only problem that i can forsee with my bf would be..statement no.2..about the MONEY..the only thing that hinders us from our plans is his financial capability..i do believe he loves me and there's no doubt in what i feel for him..we keep on setting dates for our plans but its constantly changing bec of his financial capabilty..he doesnt support me financialy but that doesnt matter all i want is for us to be together..i know this might just be a test for us..and i would want to stick with him no matter what..but i cant deny that this is already frustrating..and its sad to see him down and sad because of this problem..he is working as a chef..and sometimes i cant help but wonder how other people can manage to save up just to make their relationship work..but on a second thought he's been changing jobs just to make it all work..so i know it will all happen because i can see the effort but the only question is when..now.im trying to check if there is any way for me to go to UK using my own options..bec i really dont know how long do i have to wait if i will just sit here and do nothing..

[beppe]

You are all beautiful women (well apart from the ones with a moustache ), and have the upbringing and respect that many UK guys would kill for (hopefully not the present wife to win you over ).

If you haven't found anyone yet, or recently split up, don't worry, time WILL find you someone.

Remember this though, you are the prize that has us guys running to the Philippines to grovel before you, this means you have the upper hand. YOU are in control. If the guy doesn't fit into exactly what YOU want for the rest of your life, move on, the one for you will be along soon after.

Some things that can mean it's the worng guy:

Arguing with you - This is a no no. Small tiffs yes, but not constant arguing, that is NOT happiness, and can lead to resentment & relationship failure.

Always going on about money - Not a good sign at all. If the guy has problems now, he WILL not be able to support you as you should be supported.

Doesn't want to visit you - If they are not gagging to get to you ASAP, dump them. They lack the passion for your relationship.

I'm sure the guys on here can add more advice.

well said but I always believe a bit of good luck helps a lot

[agnesdale]

I would add a word of caution here to this advice. There is a widespread belief in the Philippines that every white man is loaded. There is another belief that if they (the white guy married to a Filipina within a family) has it, and you (the Filipino within that family) needs it, it is their duty to give it to you without too many questions asked. Sorry if this sounds cynical. In many cases your wife, or fiance, won't be like that at all but members of her family will be. She might become as agrieved as you at constant demands for "support" or "allowances" but her natural family orientation will make her feel guilty if she doesn't "help". My advice to everyone is to establish some ground rules early on and then stick to them. To the ladies I would say please make sure that you are marrying your man for love, and for your own future, and not because he can be the salvation of your family. To the guys I would say beware, when you marry a Filipina you will find that her family play a much bigger part in your future than you might be prepared for. If you are ready for that, fine, but if not you can expect problems. My own response has always been to support efforts to become self sufficient and to avoid those which lead to dependency. I have failed miserably. Every venture we have supported, and there have been many, has failed due to a lack of basic business sense and discipline, with money being diverted to other pressing "needs" and then the hands are held out for more from the rich guy. It can produce stress and you need to be prepared.

This is well said,I definitely agree.However in both sides there should be always cautions.Take time to know each other and all the problems that might come ahead will be visible,if you cant take it,,then "time to run.."
But love should not be like that,it should be sticking together even if you break your neck trying come highs and lows,so make sure that you really love each other...because year after year the only contstant in life is changes..
Beauty fades,money wont last...but if you take a monkey for its money,the money will go the monkey will stay...

[satchuna]

You are all beautiful women (well apart from the ones with a moustache ), and have the upbringing and respect that many UK guys would kill for (hopefully not the present wife to win you over ).


Doesn't want to visit you - If they are not gagging to get to you ASAP, dump them. They lack the passion for your relationship.

love! love this!(^_^) since I am a Filipina

[SteveTalaga]

A few more thoughts to add to my post yesterday, directed to the ladies. I find that many Filipinas have a belief that their "needs" will all be taken care of by their husband. He will pay all the costs for housing, food, transport, clothing etc etc from what he earns. Of course, if you are a full time housewife, looking after the home and kids, then that is true. However that is a rarity in the UK these days. Most couples both have to work just to pay their bills and lead a reasonable life style. Nevertheless many Filipinas feel that what they can earn is "theirs" and that they can do whatever they wish with it, normally sending most of it back to their various family members. This can cause conflict. You are not an OCW here just to work and remit. You are a wife and you must take an appropriate share of the living costs of you and your husband. There may not be very much left to send back. Thats' the way it is here now so you had also best be prepared for it.

Amen!!!

[ynacielo]

yes i ran away aswell from my husband,he talks about money a lot,it seems that his life evolve with money,he normally telling me,everything is his..........i cant use some stuff in the house like computer,telephone,coz according to him thats his,sometimes he hid car key ended me calling my friend to take me to work,telling me that asian is just a novelty and scammers,,,,,throwing me out of the house whenever his angry.threatening me, i had enough,now i might get deported,coz social worker old me to apply residency,im such in a big mess,i thought social worker knows what they are doing....i shudnt believe them.....

[South-east boy]

yes i ran away aswell from my husband,he talks about money a lot,it seems that his life evolve with money,he normally telling me,everything is his..........i cant use some stuff in the house like computer,telephone,coz according to him thats his,sometimes he hid car key ended me calling my friend to take me to work,telling me that asian is just a novelty and scammers,,,,,throwing me out of the house whenever his angry.threatening me, i had enough,now i might get deported,coz social worker old me to apply residency,im such in a big mess,i thought social worker knows what they are doing....i shudnt believe them.....

I'm sorry for what has happened with you- your husband has acted quite unreasonably, immaturely and cruely. Have you doccumented everything like that that he has done? If not, then do so as soon as possible. Also book an appointment with the citizens advice burreau -it's free. I'm sure other people on here can offer some more help and advice as well. I hope u can spend Christmas with some friends and that next year will be better for you

[sensi*]

interesting thread!

[gWaPito]

This is so true.. Some Filipinas with thier UK husbands do have trouble shaking the OCW syndrome. They have difficulty accepting the concept of shared responsibility for cost of living expenses.

Are Filipina wives for real..??? Or do they consider a UK husband as an overseas opportunity/employer?? The ongoing goal will be to support the family back home.. Yes indeed, when they work, their salary is for the folks back home.. The poor UK hubby is just to cover the day to day expenses in the UK..

bystander

i can assure you, not in our household! what my wife earns stays here and that is her choice, not mine, yes we are a ph/uk marriage but, unlike others we are more like a western marriage ie; the money goes into one pool, our pool

[triple5]

You're replying to a banned member who posted 9 months ago

[ceekays]

This is true, i am only 23, i been looking for someone to be with but im a true gentleman and when i go out with someone in the uk i am always too good for them or not good enough never found that just right.

I have only just recently started to speak to some filipina girls and already found them to be more polite and easier to get along with. They have that upbringing which i could only dream of in a girl.