RHB and Ading not your typical

[RHB]

how did I get to Philippines/
Me? I came for a visit from the Great White North. Canada that is. Wandered around up north in Luzon, then Cebu. Was staying at Panagsama Beach, near Moal Boal being a would be dive bum, but had an inner ear infection at the time that kept me high and dry. Well not dry, San Mig, and occasional Tequila shots in the evening. Panagsama has these modest little seaside reastaurants on stilts at the waterfront. As I would sit there looking south West sipping my drink and waiting for the Maya Maya I had picked to be grilled, I wondered aloud to he waitress. Hey whats over there? Pointing to Negros Oriental Negros.
She replied with pride, That where my place is. She went on to say it is a place of agriculture, farmers, mountains, and volcanos. Very green, she added. Well, I used to be a farmer once, I lived in he mountains as well. Never saw a volcano, so three good reasons to visit I surmised.

Having planned to return to Cebu in a couple weeks to look up some friends, I decided to ferry over to Negros for maybe a week, two at most. That was a year and a half ago. I had queried the waitress about cities to visit. She was from Dumaguete. So, after doing a little Internet research on lodging I meandered over.

What is it about this place? not sure but I now feel compeled to defend it in the face of critcs, and call it home. Found a good girl, finally got away fom the Boulevard scene, not that it is so bad, but I prefer... well thats another thread.
My wife has a small bussiness that keeps both of us busy, but certainly not rich. a little combination sari sari, eatery, karaoke, drinking establishment. You know the type. Off the beaten path, in the neighborhoods. Native style fixings. Got my broadband nice. Life is good eh?

to be continued; the interim before my honey ading...

[fred]

Another success story here!! Well done sir.. Long may it continue.

[Mrs.JMajor]

Nice to know that u enjoy living here in PI,more good luck for your business
just a silly question ! Do u agree on what they say that behind the success of the man is can give credit to their woman hehe not sure if that is Filipino belief eh

[kimmi]

Ate Juliet, is it the wife help a lot???

[Alan]

I happen to know this gentleman RHB - we have been on several rides together - and he is my friend - unlike the bitch that spurned me recently - who I now hear has caught a very serious STD!!!

OOOps! - Sorry - Hanna has just come into the room so have to get back to hetrosexuality.

Daphne.

BTW - got so carried away - forgot why I made this post.

Yes Fred, RHB is indeed another success story. I shall introduce you when you are here.

Daphne (again).

[tomm]

Well done and good luck

[tomm]

I happen to know this gentleman RHB - we have been on several rides together - and he is my friend - unlike the bitch that spurned me recently - who I now hear has caught a very serious STD!!!

[RHB]

I came to Negros Oriental without any particular purpose. Just exploring looking at various places. Ading was still in the future tense, and in fact was in Singapore when I dropped off at the pier in Amlan. Dumaguete was immediately attractive; quaint, clean for the Phils, and very laid back. The tricycle drivers did not rip me off, and prices were cheaper than in Cebu by a considerable amount. So, I rented a room for 10 days, figuring I might go back to Cebu City, then to parts unknown.
Dumaguete has a Boulevard, which essentially is a wide ocean front promenade lined with trees adjacent to a street. This "strip" has the tourist hotspots, restaurants, and dive shops.

As a single I did the Why Not disco frequently, even at 60+ I enjoy dancing. Met some girls who obviously were there to prey on guys like me, but mostly I just enjoyed dancing with the girls. Quickly I grew tired of that scene, with the ugly Americans, Germans, Aussies etc. drinking in excess, treating Filipinas badly, and basically acting like jerks.

I moved to a somewhat shabby resort north of town, very nice, quiet, with a swimming pool, ahh yes relaxing and quiet. This way I was not always surrounded by the "expat" scene.
Met a girl quite by accident that I knew from Moal Boal. We hit it off and ended up living together, first mistake! The rental house was in a nice western Barangay far from town, A quiet and friendly rural setting.

Her parents lived behind, and things were fine for a couple weeks...

[Mrs.JMajor]

And.............................. things were fine for a couple of weeks ??? and what bout the rest of the week

[RHB]

stay tuned...

[fred]

RBH.. They didn`t go and turn you over did they?
Im spitting feathers here!!

[RHB]

if turn you over means what I think, they tried... only somewhat successesfully, more tomorrow.

[fred]

Bugger me!!..
I think I know where this is going!
Experience is a truly wonderful thing...

[RHB]

Still getting used to the UK colloquialisms.

Well this first girl was really a nice kid, I say kid because she was young, not too young, but basically a province girl with little education. Dinner time conversations were sparsely sprinkled with conversation, no… there was no conversation. She was bright, and like many local folks could express herself very poetically in the written word. But I felt more like a tutor than a suitor.

The family lived right behind us in a one room plywood hut. Dad worked as a driver for the property owner from whom I rented and was provided the house. Mom did not work, and stayed home with the two remaining children. They were actually good people, I bear them no malice, but they were so poor, having a “rich” foreigner living with their daughter was a dream come true. They actually asked for nothing from me at first. I sometimes shared food with them, taught the younger brother how to use the computer, he was 6. A delightful lad I was happy to help out.

But them I noticed mom was always at the back door, then, I would come home from and errand and the family was watching tv at our house. Now they had a Tele at their place, but the sala was nicer at our house.

Then Cathy reluctantly asked on behalf of mom if I would “lend” them money to bring Lolo home from Manila where he was staying with other relatives. I agreed, even suspecting I would not see money returned. It was a small thing. I was new to the Philippines but was getting an education.

Cathy was not a balanced girl, and as time passed I realized mom was the force behind the relationship. She was uncomfortable with her mom’s requests to ask me for things. Again there was no evil here, but I soon realized what an effect I had on their lives as a potential benefactor. At times Cathy would have fits of depression, become withdrawn and not speak for days; I was worried, for her, but more worried about me, especially when she locked herself in the CR with a kitchen knife one night. If anything would happen to her, I would be held responsible.

After a month, I tried to get her to go to counseling, or talk to another adult besides her mom, to no avail. I had better luck talking to her sister. The sister actually supported my concerns. Eventually I knew I had to extricate myself from this situation. But how was I to do this? I would have to be clever, and careful. After all I lived next door, I could not just leave, I had a lease to terminate, and I knew quite well danger was associated with any attempt to terminate this situation. Papa had a bolo.

[Mrs.JMajor]

uh-oh ok i will stay tuned another interesting story like sir al before ,we are very glad to hear the continuation sir

[RHB]

Actually the process to get out of this somewhat uncomfortable situation unfolded on its own. I had to tell the girl that we could not be together any more. It was sad, and hurtful for me in a way, as she was a victim as much as I was. But certainly I had little to lose other than my neck if Papa decided to sneak up on me one night.

She was losing her foreigner.

The mother was actually sympathetic and we came to an understanding. I paid to send cathy to Manila, gave her 5k Pesos to live on until she could get established. They had relatives there. Well I thought she would get the money. I found out later, mother took the money from the girl before she left.

I was able to find another house quickly, and moved without warning the family. I stayed in contact for awhile, Cathy ended up pregnant with an old boyfriend, and is living with mom raising the kid. The father is absentee, not uncommon here.

I laid low for a while thinking that retaliation might come my way, but it did not. It was a valuble lesson for a stupid and naive foreigner. Money talks. and divides families. You can kill someone in a car accident, have the family threaten you. You pay them the death penalty and they are all smiles again. It was one lesson however that did not prepare me for the next episode.

[Mrs.JMajor]

gosh do u know i only log on now on the forum just to check if theres continuation already.........go......go sir
still tuning

[RHB]

After that, I went about life in dumaguete, touring, looking for bussiness opportunities, and making some local friends. I stayed away from serious relationships for a while. I really liked the area, and wanted to stay for a while, I bought a motorcycle, and some furniture for my rental house, without realizing it I was putting down roots here.

I met the next girlfriend quite by accident one day while having lunch at a local resort. It was a slow start...

[tomm]

After that, I went about life in dumaguete, touring, looking for bussiness opportunities, and making some local friends. I stayed away from serious relationships for a while. I really liked the area, and wanted to stay for a while, I bought a motorcycle, and some furniture for my rental house, without realizing it I was putting down roots here.

I met the next girlfriend quite by accident one day while having lunch at a local resort. It was a slow start...

Interesting read.... thanks

[RHB]

I'll admit, I am not the smartest person in the world. But after my first "relationship" experience in the Philippines, I was getting smarter; not so quick to trust, and looking at the local economics and culture with more perspective when it came getting involved with a girl. Certain realities are always in play.

It was not long before marilyn exposed her true intentions. I was watching with an eye for deception, allowed her to play out her cards and then called her on it.
She was an older student in a local university, a 25 year old single mom trying to raise her child and improve her life. As it turned out she was a user and skillfull manipulater. It only took me a few weeks to get wise to her tricks, and she never actually lived with me, a good thing as it turned out.

Some of the Filipinas who are not so honest when looking for "their foreigner", can have a series of tactics to throw off the unsuspecting guy. They can indeed be very patient, and Marilyn was. She never asked for money, even offered to pay for lunch a few times. What I didn't know at first but suspected, was that she had another foreigner on the string. She was skillful enough to admit that she had another previous UK guy as a friend before she met me. She even admitted to taking money from him for her schooling. What I was really suspicious of was her sneaky behaivior. she would be careful not to be seen with me on certain occasions. I began to surmise there was more to her than met the eye. As it turned out she also had a Filipino boyfriend in town.

The set up:
It happened when she left my house after having lunch to go take an exam at school. A few minutes later she called frantcally exclaiming she had an outstanding bill for uniforms from the school and it had to be paid before taking the exam. I was faced with making a quick descision, I agreed to pay the 1500 Pesos, and then set out to investigate.

She thought she had me, but for 25 USD (at the time)I was willing to give her some rope, and or the benefit of the doubt.

After that, I played detective, letting her think that she had me fooled. I looked in her purse and found a reciept for tuition for 1500 Pesos. Hmmm...

I also found a letter to the previous boyfriend now back in the UK asking for 20,000 Pesos. Her plan, near as I could surmize was to take his money and bank it, then get me to make time payments for various "emergencies" and get paid twice for her educational costs. Well I did not take kindly to that. I began to think like a Filipino.

The plan I hatched was to get her to break up with the guy in the UK, (he had no idea he was being fleeced), and save him from losing his money, then tell her to hit the bricks.

The sad part was that she used her daughter as a pawn in all this, it was quite an act. An act played out time and again here. I played along for a week or so, but was very careful not to leave her in the house alone, or give her any more cash! I would have to be clever, as it turned out things went quite well...

[jimeve]

So thats were my 20,000 pesos went.

[Alan]

A few minutes later she called frantcally exclaiming she had an outstanding bill for uniforms from the school and it had to be paid before taking the exam.

How very odd! I had exactly the same request from one of the girls I spoke to online - before I met Hanna of course!

Al.

[Mrs.JMajor]

jedc stay tuned................ still waiting for the next episode sir

[Mrs.JMajor]

by the way RHB, i'm still here...keeping in touch w/ your interesting story

[gingxrick]

Hi Alan and hanna, how are things there with you both hope you are keeping fit Alan but also enjoying an easy life from ricky and ging forgot to say my friend there in Cebu (Angus) died the other week will misss him a lot