I live on Disability Allowance - Can I get my Pinay wife to UK

[ginapeterb]

The following is the contents of an email forwarded to me at Bf.com today. (Name has been removed for privacy).


Hello Webmaster,

I am wondering if you can advise me, my name is xxxx in March of 2004, I flew to Davao City through Manila to meet my pinay GF, and in September we had our wedding in Davao City, everything has been fine, but my question is simpe

Can I get my wife to UK on the spouse visa with this circumstances.


1. I am not working.
2. I have permanent partial disability.
3. I am in receipt of Disability Living Alllowance (enhanced amount).
4. I am also in receipt of Income Support.
5. My savings were put in my brothers account so that they were not taken into cosideration.
6. I have some savings, about £5000.00.


The reason for my e mail, is that you mentioned that I have to demonstrate that I can support my wife without 'recourse to public funds'.

This is worrying me as I did not think about this when I met my GF in Philippines, I thought that there should be no problems bringing her to UK, but recently I saw your website under google search, now I am worried because you seem to say, there is not much chance, and we have got married, ??

Where do we go from here ? I am 52 years old, and my wife is only 23 years, we love each other very much, and my wife thinks she is coming soon to UK, I have not told her my dillema, and the problems I may face, but I am desperate for help in this.

I have used up some of my savings now, what with the costs of 2 visits, the wedding, so my savings have depleted, I have already spent close to £5000.00 on the flights, hotels, trips, and the wedding, so I am hoping the rest of my savings will be enough, at present I live in my brothers house, and it talks about suitable accomodation, do you think it will be enough for us to have a room at his house ?

It doesnt say anything about the accomodation requirements, just 'suitable accomodation'

I am embarassed to ask this, but do you think it would be possible, to have a co-sponsor for my wife ? I am sending you this mail because I am wondering whether you would help me in this ?


If you can help me sponsor my wife, it woulnd't involve you in any inconvenience in the UK, once she is here, of course it would not be your concern, but if you can help me, I would appreciate your advice and if you can do it for me.


Yours sincerely,



xxxxxxx

Petes comments



All yours Rob !!!!!!

[walesrob]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ginapeterb &#064; Apr 5 2006, 08&#58;55 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>

Petes comments
All yours Rob &#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;&#33;
[/b][/quote]

Pete, you always give me the easy ones :-)

To be bluntly honest, this guy is better off going to live in the Philippines, and telling his wife the TRUTH about whats really going on. Unless the Embassy find Jesus soon [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Hellooo.gif[/img] , I doubt a visa will be issued, and I wouldn&#39;t waste £280 finding out, there is nothing in this story that will satisfy even the nicest ECO. Sorry&#33;

There are a couple "maybes" here:

1) HE is in receipt of benefits, not her, so there will be no burden on the state as such, and if he can find a job for her before she arrives and get it confirmed, then this may help.

2) Elsa and I are living at my folks place (ok so its a 5 bed house and only Elsa and I and my mother live there) until we can find that elusive cheap house, and I see no reason why this guy can say the same thing, tell his brother to confirm this in writing. My line of thinking is why rent or buy a house on a "maybe" chance of getting a visa.

Don&#39;t bother with the co-sponsor lark Pete, it ain&#39;t worth the hassle, but you probably already know that.

[ginapeterb]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(walesrob &#064; Apr 5 2006, 10&#58;35 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
Pete, you always give me the easy ones :-)

To be bluntly honest, this guy is better off going to live in the Philippines, and telling his wife the TRUTH about whats really going on. Unless the Embassy find Jesus soon [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Hellooo.gif[/img] , I doubt a visa will be issued, and I wouldn&#39;t waste £280 finding out, there is nothing in this story that will satisfy even the nicest ECO. Sorry&#33;

There are a couple "maybes" here:

1) HE is in receipt of benefits, not her, so there will be no burden on the state as such, and if he can find a job for her before she arrives and get it confirmed, then this may help.

2) Elsa and I are living at my folks place (ok so its a 5 bed house and only Elsa and I and my mother live there) until we can find that elusive cheap house, and I see no reason why this guy can say the same thing, tell his brother to confirm this in writing. My line of thinking is why rent or buy a house on a "maybe" chance of getting a visa.

Don&#39;t bother with the co-sponsor lark Pete, it ain&#39;t worth the hassle, but you probably already know that.
[/b][/quote]

hahahaha, no Rob, I just thought its your customer &#33; or we could Pass it on to Ivor, he is in a good mood, now since he and Mel are back from Philippines, maybe we should send it over to him.

Go for it Ivor &#33;&#33; hahahaha

[deepete]

Another maybe, was it posted on April 1st

[Admin]

I don&#39;t find anything about the email amusing. I was in a similar situation myself at the time I brought the missus over, although it was from Singapore, and was &#39;between&#39; homes, but the only financial proof I had then was my benefits....not sure they would have understood any winnings from gambling, and probably would have put it down as a black mark as professional gamblers don&#39;t exist do they? [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/rolleyes.gif[/img]

[mupsuit]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(walesrob &#064; Apr 5 2006, 10&#58;35 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
Pete, you always give me the easy ones :-)

To be bluntly honest, this guy is better off going to live in the Philippines, .
[/b][/quote]


This is a real dilema for the man - I agree that he can not hold much hope of getting a spouse visa as they are adamant that public funds are not considered ....

also he can&#39;t go to PI to live as I believe disability allowances are only paid while resident in the UK

I think he should go to see his Benefits Case officer and discuss his situation - there may be a concession that we are unaware of - eg his wife will be his carer and thus qualify for a visa or perhaps they will pay his allowances while he is overseas

ask him to keep us informed as this topic will come up again

[ivor&mel]

hahahaha, no Rob, I just thought its your customer ! or we could Pass it on to Ivor, he is in a good mood, now since he and Mel are back from Philippines, maybe we should send it over to him.

Go for it Ivor !! hahahaha

I would, but unfortunately I'm still a Newbie.... I know my place

[deepete]

So you all seem to think its O.K. for the guy to marry his partner without letting her know that he lives on benifits and she may turn out to be the breadwinner, and it didnt dawn on her to ask about his circumstances, if she did he must have lied because he said she doesnt know.

I dont think its a good way to start a marriage.

[walesrob]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(deepete &#064; Apr 5 2006, 09&#58;13 PM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
So you all seem to think its O.K. for the guy to marry his partner without letting her know that he lives on benifits and she may turn out to be the breadwinner, and it didnt dawn on her to ask about his circumstances, if she did he must have lied because he said she doesnt know.

I dont think its a good way to start a marriage.
[/b][/quote]

I did actually make the point that he should be totally honest with his wife, and he hasn&#39;t. He&#39;s setting himself up for a big fall, so if I were him, I would tell her everything NOW.

[ivor&mel]

So you all seem to think its O.K. for the guy to marry his partner without letting her know that he lives on benifits and she may turn out to be the breadwinner, and it didnt dawn on her to ask about his circumstances, if she did he must have lied because he said she doesnt know.

I dont think its a good way to start a marriage.

I think there is a lot that is NOT OK about this couple's situation, and I find it difficult to say anything optimistic about the proposed application beyond what Rob has already said. At the very least, there has been a lack of openness and thought about their relationship, but that may be down to blissful ignorance rather than lying.

Whatever... if this was a genuine e-mail, then they are facing an uphill struggle and I'm sure they would appreciate all the help they can get from here or elsewhere. We all make mistakes, overlook things - even me, I believe It IS a genuine e-mail, isn't it Pete? Do the mail headers look pukka?

Ivor and Mel

[ginapeterb]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ivor&mel &#064; Apr 5 2006, 09&#58;57 PM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
I think there is a lot that is NOT OK about this couple&#39;s situation, and I find it difficult to say anything optimistic about the proposed application beyond what Rob has already said. At the very least, there has been a lack of openness and thought about their relationship, but that may be down to blissful ignorance rather than lying.

Whatever... if this was a genuine e-mail, then they are facing an uphill struggle and I&#39;m sure they would appreciate all the help they can get from here or elsewhere. We all make mistakes, overlook things - even me, I believe [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif[/img] It IS a genuine e-mail, isn&#39;t it Pete? Do the mail headers look pukka?

Ivor and Mel
[/b][/quote]


This one was re mailed to me Ivor, so I don&#39;t know where it came from, it came through the website, but I have no reason to believe, anyone would write this if it wasn&#39;t a true reflection of their personal circumstances, I don&#39;t judge the guy, he has his own set of probs to deal with.

He probably started off by stringing the girl along on the net, only to find he was deep in it, when some months had passed.

But, stories are like a holes, everyone has one &#33;

[ivor&mel]

This one was re mailed to me Ivor, so I don't know where it came from, it came through the website, but I have no reason to believe, anyone would write this if it wasn't a true reflection of their personal circumstances, I don't judge the guy, he has his own set of probs to deal with.

He probably started off by stringing the girl along on the net, only to find he was deep in it, when some months had passed.

But, stories are like a holes, everyone has one !

The reason I asked about the authenticity of the e-mail was the bit about co-sponsorship: that is a new concept to me. What does it involve? A sponsor has financial obligations, so a co-sponsor would have too? If so, then the bit about "If you can help me sponsor my wife, it woulnd't involve you in any inconvenience in the UK" rings rather hollow... Maybe I've seen too many variations on the 419 scam and am getting cynica l And too many memories of Filipinaheart - just seeing the words "help me" flashes up "give money to me"

But if the guy is genuine, he has my sympathy. He has a place to live, and where his wife could live. He has not insubstantial savings, albeit - unless I have misread - hidden from Big Brother, which may prove problematic in declaring on the application form? Where does he live? 5K in London is different from 5K in Gateshead. How much is "Disability Living Alllowance (enhanced amount) + Income Support" worth? He's got 5K savings and had another 5K to spend on trips to Phil, so he's hardly been on the breadline? The criteria for successful visa applications are STILL a mystery to me - do you have any ideas about what the minimum level people have been accepted on? Has anyone in his position been granted a visa as far as you know? I really wish the guy good luck, and just hope he can explain the true situation to his wife as soon as possible so that they can work on this together.

Ivor and Mel

[ginapeterb]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ivor&mel &#064; Apr 9 2006, 10&#58;27 PM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
The reason I asked about the authenticity of the e-mail was the bit about co-sponsorship: that is a new concept to me. What does it involve? A sponsor has financial obligations, so a co-sponsor would have too? If so, then the bit about "If you can help me sponsor my wife, it woulnd&#39;t involve you in any inconvenience in the UK" rings rather hollow... Maybe I&#39;ve seen too many variations on the 419 scam and am getting cynical And too many memories of Filipinaheart - just seeing the words "help me" flashes up "give money to me" [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif[/img]

But if the guy is genuine, he has my sympathy. He has a place to live, and where his wife could live. He has not insubstantial savings, albeit - unless I have misread - hidden from Big Brother, which may prove problematic in declaring on the application form? Where does he live? 5K in London is different from 5K in Gateshead. How much is "Disability Living Alllowance (enhanced amount) + Income Support" worth? He&#39;s got 5K savings and had another 5K to spend on trips to Phil, so he&#39;s hardly been on the breadline? The criteria for successful visa applications are STILL a mystery to me - do you have any ideas about what the minimum level people have been accepted on? Has anyone in his position been granted a visa as far as you know? I really wish the guy good luck, and just hope he can explain the true situation to his wife as soon as possible so that they can work on this together.

Ivor and Mel



Ivor and Mel
[/b][/quote]

Of course you are correct Ivor, I suppose he should get our sympathies, not everyone I guess fits in the pidgeon hole of self reliance and a regular income, I suppose we also have to remember, that sometimes we think " Why is this guy stringing this girl along" when it may be a genuine situation, where he finds himself not fitting quite right into the pidgeon slot, I think he said, his 5k is depleted now, I dont think he has another 5k, Im not sure about the minimum levels, I think to be honest, its mainly, that the guy is working and would not need to have recourse to public funds to support his wife, if he is living on public funds, he cannot bring a.n. other to live in UK whilst being in receipt.

There are some who would say &#39; he has no business marrying a girl, whilst on public funds&#39; and there are those who might sympathise with his situation, as some of them may be partially disabled, and of course we know these guys are entitled to a happy life also.

I suppose its not impossible for this to go through ok, again the burden of proof would be on the guys ability to support his wife without recourse, as far as his attempts to get &#39;co sponsorship&#39; I would be suprised if anyone would do that for him ? we all have to support our own wives, although many pinays, once the settle in to life in UK tend to want to work themselves, for various reasons, so they in fact never become a burden on public funds.

Its a paradox, all they seem to be concerned about at UKVisas, is that the &#39;Applicant does not represent a burden on public funds&#39; and yet, the statistics, show that Pinoys and Pinays alike, tend to come to UK and end up working in jobs that many of us would rather not do, such as house helps, Nanny&#39;s Domestic workers, shop assistants, in the food trade, and other lower paid jobs, and yet they do find work fairly quickly, this shows that they wouldnt really end up being a burden on public funds, the problem with the spouse/fiancee visa process, is that the applicant cannot simply expect to show the Embassy that they would work, when they don&#39;t in fact have a job, the only case where I saw that was different, is actually our very own Rob, Forum Moderator, who could with all honesty say, that his wife had a job to go to, because Elsa&#39;s Job was already agreed and in place.

Rob will no doubt back us on this one, but as far as this guy goes, I hope he sorts it out, but its unreasonable for him to presume that some other guy can co-sponsor his wife, the Embassy are never going to sanction that.

As I said, best of luck to him.

[Pauldo]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ginapeterb &#064; Apr 10 2006, 09&#58;45 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>


Its a paradox, all they seem to be concerned about at UKVisas, is that the &#39;Applicant does not represent a burden on public funds&#39; and yet, the statistics, show that Pinoys and Pinays alike, tend to come to UK and end up working in jobs that many of us would rather not do, such as house helps, Nanny&#39;s Domestic workers, shop assistants, in the food trade, and other lower paid jobs, and yet they do find work fairly quickly....
[/b][/quote]

Yet the government are throwing billions at anybody who comes to the UK who is NOT qualified to assist or help the country in any way. Illegals, asylum seekers, political dissidents and other general lazy gits. None of it makes sense to me any more.

My local hospital, where my wife is currently training as a nurse, has just laid of 150 staff, including doctors and nurses, yet last week they were showing a whole bunch of freshly imported Indian nurses round the joint. Same with North Staffs hospital, just laid off 1000 staff, including docs/nurses. Yet the papers are screaming "massive shortage of qualified nurses in England".

Who is &#036;hitting whom in the UK??? [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/wacko.gif[/img] [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/blink.gif[/img]

[Admin]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'>if he is living on public funds, he cannot bring a.n. other to live in UK whilst being in receipt.[/b][/quote]

Yes he can. I did, and I know another person on Incapacity and DLA that did. It has nothing to do with where the British person gets there money from, just that they have to prove they have enough left over to support there other half.

It is his money, and he can spend it anyway he wants. I would prefer some of it be invested in a filipino girl, than the average unemployed English guy/woman spending it on drink, ciggies & drugs.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE</div><div class='quotemain'>
Pinoys and Pinays alike, tend to come to UK and end up working in jobs that many of us would rather not do, such as house helps, Nanny&#39;s Domestic workers, shop assistants, in the food trade, and other lower paid jobs[/b][/quote]
...and without these people our country would be in even more sh1t, as the average lazy English folk can&#39;t be [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/butthead.gif[/img] with any job that may involve actually doing some work.

How many times when you visit a hospital are the English nurses sitting down having a chat and a cup of tea, while the Filipino nurses are still working? Every time, and I vist the hospital a lot.

[ervenescence]

If this is for real, I would say poor girl because she doesn&#39;t know yet of whats the truth behind this guy who completely rely on benifits. Damn&#33; why not tell her the truth&#33; Its maybe because he&#39;s afraid of what might have happen, that she might turn out once she knows it? - lets say as same as reaction of the other women in his place when he tried to court them and once they knew the truth they were all vanish.

Please don&#39;t make lifes more complicated, don&#39;t think about the immigration for now - please he have to clean his mess first before getting involve with a filipina abroad and planning for a marriage. I hope he&#39;s not serious with this because the girl will end up of blaming him and the possibility of getting a divorce once she will know it after marriage. So 52 and 23? [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Erm.gif[/img] im not against of age gap, but I hope she will not dump him once she get her in the UK, only if she grant the visa.


(Now I fancy fish and chips [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif[/img] )

[truelove26]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ervenescence &#064; Apr 27 2006, 09&#58;42 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
If this is for real, I would say poor girl because she doesn&#39;t know yet of whats the truth behind this guy who completely rely on benifits. Damn&#33; why not tell her the truth&#33; Its maybe because he&#39;s afraid of what might have happen, that she might turn out once she knows it? - lets say as same as reaction of the other women in his place when he tried to court them and once they knew the truth they were all vanish.

Please don&#39;t make lifes more complicated, don&#39;t think about the immigration for now - please he have to clean his mess first before getting involve with a filipina abroad and planning for a marriage. I hope he&#39;s not serious with this because the girl will end up of blaming him and the possibility of getting a divorce once she will know it after marriage. So 52 and 23? [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Erm.gif[/img] im not against of age gap, but I hope she will not dump him once she get her in the UK, only if she grant the visa.
(Now I fancy fish and chips [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/laugh.gif[/img] )
[/b][/quote]
i felt so upset about the guy&#39;s situation....maybe its not his intention to hide the truth to the girl,its just that sometimes we get scared of telling the truth maybe if we did,well lost someoen who is dear to us.but still,if he really needs to be sure that the girl loves him then he must have tell her the truth before getting married...
his situation is a bit complicated specially when it comes to the embassy but i wish them good luck for the future.....

truelove26

[Pauldo]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(truelove26 &#064; Apr 27 2006, 11&#58;33 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
i felt so upset about the guy&#39;s situation....maybe its not his intention to hide the truth to the girl,its just that sometimes we get scared of telling the truth maybe if we did,well lost someoen who is dear to us.but still,if he really needs to be sure that the girl loves him then he must have tell her the truth before getting married...
his situation is a bit complicated specially when it comes to the embassy but i wish them good luck for the future.....

truelove26
[/b][/quote]

I feel sorry for the poor old guy, if he is indeed what he makes out to be: a lonely old chap looking for love and companionship. I don&#39;t think he is/was out to rip anybody off or decieve them.

Just think what he has to look forward to if he stayed at home in the cold amd miserable UK. Would he find love there? I doubt it, unless he was happy to shack up with some 50 year old English crone, who would probably come with a ready made family of her own and more than enough emotional baggage for the two of them.

I do think he may be treading on thin ice if he brings her over without first explaining the full details, but maybe she already knows his circumstances? Ideally, the embassy will check into whether they think he can support and provide for his wife? Maybe she will be happy and willing to work as soon as she arrives?

People see the age gap as an obstacle, a hurdle, something unusual, even see it as wrong, but they are usually the people who have never travelled the world and see the ways different societies live. English people have the luxury of the welfare state to fall back on if they are too lazy or sick to work and provide for themselves, but other countries are not so lucky. Survival of the fittest is the way, and just because someone is twice your age doesn&#39;t mean you should shun them as a mate, if your two lives together are beneficial for each other. Sometimes people don&#39;t have the luxury of waiting for the perfect partner to turn up.

If he can provide her with security, a place to live, an income, food on the table, a future, and she can provide him with companionship, care, sex, the feeling of being wanted, then they have found love in their own way, regardless of their ages or the circumstances in which they met.

[lefthandseat]

[quote name=&#39;Pauldo&#39; date=&#39;Apr 27 2006, 08:48 PM&#39; post=&#39;5527&#39;]
"I feel sorry for the poor old guy, if he is indeed what he makes out to be: a lonely old chap looking for love... "

Hey guys&#33;&#33; PLEASE can we less of the appalling ageism&#33;&#33;&#33; This poor fellow has enough problems without having to suffer the epithet "old" TWICE in the same sentence&#33;

He is only in his early fifties, and that is NOT "old".

Seriously, you ought to know better&#33;&#33; You criticise many aspects of the UK, and I am in general agreement with the vast majority of your comments, but rampant ageism is something which is quite intolerable.

We have come to accept that we should not discriminate for reasons of gender, race, creed, etc - but why is it that we still consider it perfectly acceptable to be offensive about someone&#39;s age - especially when they are NOT old????

OK, speech over - I hope someone can give this guy the help he needs so that he can be with the wife he loves.

[Pauldo]

"Hey guys&#33;&#33; PLEASE can we less of the appalling ageism&#33;&#33;&#33; This poor fellow has enough problems without having to suffer the epithet "old" TWICE in the same sentence&#33;

He is only in his early fifties, and that is NOT "old".

Seriously, you ought to know better&#33;&#33; You criticise many aspects of the UK, and I am in general agreement with the vast majority of your comments, but rampant ageism is something which is quite intolerable.

We have come to accept that we should not discriminate for reasons of gender, race, creed, etc - but why is it that we still consider it perfectly acceptable to be offensive about someone&#39;s age - especially when they are NOT old????

OK, speech over - I hope someone can give this guy the help he needs so that he can be with the wife he loves."

Hey dude, step back and take a chill pill. You&#39;ve been on this forum two days, made five posts, and you&#39;re already telling us what to think and what our opinions should be????

[Admin]

50 is OLD in human life term expectancy, as the stats of dieing increase each year after that....have a nice day [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Grin.gif[/img]

[walesrob]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(admin &#064; May 7 2006, 07&#58;33 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
50 is OLD in human life term expectancy, as the stats of dieing increase each year after that....have a nice day [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Grin.gif[/img]
[/b][/quote]

Keith you always bring sunshine to the forum [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Wave.gif[/img] [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Wave.gif[/img]

What you doing up so early on a Sunday morning anyway [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/cwm24.gif[/img]

[baboyako]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(admin &#064; May 7 2006, 07&#58;33 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
50 is OLD in human life term expectancy, as the stats of dieing increase each year after that....have a nice day [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Grin.gif[/img]
[/b][/quote]
I hate to sound like an actuary [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Doh.gif[/img] but the probability of death is a minimum at the age of 7 (in the UK at least).

At 50 years old - You have another 28 years and 9 months to organise the funeral.

[Admin]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(walesrob &#064; May 7 2006, 08&#58;33 PM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
Keith you always bring sunshine to the forum [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Wave.gif[/img] [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/Wave.gif[/img]

What you doing up so early on a Sunday morning anyway [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/cwm24.gif[/img]
[/b][/quote]
I&#39;m off to Singapore on Wednesday, so already running on Afghan time zone [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif[/img]

[walesrob]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(admin &#064; May 8 2006, 06&#58;49 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
I&#39;m off to Singapore on Wednesday, so already running on Afghan time zone [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/smile.gif[/img]
[/b][/quote]

I&#39;m off to Manchester tomorrow...... [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/sad.gif[/img]

[lefthandseat]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Pauldo &#064; May 7 2006, 04&#58;31 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
"Hey guys&#33;&#33; PLEASE can we less of the appalling ageism&#33;&#33;&#33; This poor fellow has enough problems without having to suffer the epithet "old" TWICE in the same sentence&#33;

He is only in his early fifties, and that is NOT "old".

Seriously, you ought to know better&#33;&#33; You criticise many aspects of the UK, and I am in general agreement with the vast majority of your comments, but rampant ageism is something which is quite intolerable.

We have come to accept that we should not discriminate for reasons of gender, race, creed, etc - but why is it that we still consider it perfectly acceptable to be offensive about someone&#39;s age - especially when they are NOT old????

OK, speech over - I hope someone can give this guy the help he needs so that he can be with the wife he loves."

Hey dude, step back and take a chill pill. You&#39;ve been on this forum two days, made five posts, and you&#39;re already telling us what to think and what our opinions should be????
[/b][/quote]

I am somewhat surprised by your response. I am NOT telling anyone what to think - if you had read my comments accurately you would have realised that.

I was objecting to comments which I find offensive - and which may well be offensive to many others who see this site - including many men in this age-range who are either dating or married to ladies from the east. Indeed, forthcoming changes in the law will make such comments unlawful&#33;

In response to your comment about the number of postings I have made - what, precisely, is your point? Is there some &#39;time-limit&#39; before members may make postings? Do you have some issue with the other postings I have made? If so, please tell me. The comments I have posted were intended to be helpful responses to the issues raised.

If you do not agree with my comments, then that is your inalienable right - a right which I would always support.

However, it is very sad and unfortunate that you choose to do so in a manner which is so churlish and childish, and it does absolutely nothing to further the credibility and reputation of this website.

[Eurasian]

52 and 23... and in love?

This stuff really does dishearten me...

[walesrob]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(Eurasian &#064; May 27 2006, 01&#58;51 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
52 and 23... and in love?

This stuff really does dishearten me...
[/b][/quote]

Jeez, lay off with the attitude. Live and let live and all that. [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/blink.gif[/img]

[ivor&mel]

52 and 23... and in love?

This stuff really does dishearten me...

Eurasian,

This is the 3rd post from you that I have read this morning, and you've not made a particularly impressive start...

There's a 29-year age difference... And your point is what exactly...? Don't worry - it's not compulsory...

If you have something useful to contribute, please do so and you will be welcome. Otherwise, the door is open...

This stuff really DOES dishearten me!

[Eurasian]

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE(ivor&mel &#064; May 27 2006, 07&#58;49 AM) Quoted post</div><div class='quotemain'>
Eurasian,

This is the 3rd post from you that I have read this morning, and you&#39;ve not made a particularly impressive start...

There&#39;s a 29-year age difference... And your point is what exactly...? Don&#39;t worry - it&#39;s not compulsory...

If you have something useful to contribute, please do so and you will be welcome. Otherwise, the door is open...

This stuff really DOES dishearten me&#33;
[/b][/quote]

The point is, being half filipino and half white. Seeing people such as him (and yourself) pick young girls out of "dating" sites sicken me. It&#39;s just as bad as "MOB" in the respect that, they marry anyone to get to England. Regardless if they&#39;re nice or not. Then you all claim it&#39;s "love". In my eyes, your no different than the scum walking around with young girls attached to their arms in places like Manila.

And for the "useful to contribute" comment. I have my opinion, you have yours. The joys of subjectivity&#33; So I would appreciate you actually try and look at it from my perspective. Which I&#39;m guessing is pretty hard because it&#39;s been a long time since you were 18 [img]style_emoticons/<#EMO_DIR#>/tongue.gif[/img].