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Thread: Am i too young to get married?

  1. #31
    andypaul's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Win2Win View Post
    MP's are educated in public schools, and look at the utter crap they come out with.....
    Gonna say choosing the right education for the indivual is important quite often too.

    Met some posh/rich people who had to study this and do this had all the money and went to very good schools. May have even gathered an impressive array of qualfications but still useless.


  2. #32
    Respected Member scott&ligaya's Avatar
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    Hi Chino, I did know two couples who are expat/flipina ex bar girl and they have as many ups and downs as most couples but seem on the whole very happy and have been married about 10 and 15 years. . I would say that the girls involved do seem a little more mercenary than most others I know and I suspect that may be just from being conditioned by their previous work.

    One thing that does stick out is that when were out with our large group friends in Hong Kong who are xpat/filipina the other girls do seem to freeze them out a bit, I do not even know if they know if they know that they were ex bar girls or they just do not get on.

    I suspect that if she is completely removed form the scene and then ends up away from the Phils she may well fit just right in wherever you live as most Filipinas seem naturally charming and make great company and as you say she may be fully commited to not returning to the bar scene.

    good luck and I hope it works out for you
    Live your life for a reason and don't worry be happy

    if you don't know where you are going then any road will do!!


  3. #33
    Respected Member Peanutz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Win2Win View Post
    MP's are educated in public schools, and look at the utter crap they come out with.....



    I think the government needs an overhauling!



    'We dance in a circle and suppose, while the secret sits in the middle and knows'

    R.F.


  4. #34
    andypaul's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peanutz View Post
    I think the government needs an overhauling!
    Mr Admin and peanutz as the new Co primeminsters


    Can i be minster for sport please?

    Well i be minster of anything as long as they pay my dry cleaning and sky tv each month


  5. #35
    Respected Member Peanutz's Avatar
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    I will never be a good politician.
    I can't lie




    'We dance in a circle and suppose, while the secret sits in the middle and knows'

    R.F.


  6. #36
    Administrator KeithD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mavid View Post
    .....long engagement.
    Just look at Iraq
    Keith - Administrator


  7. #37
    Administrator KeithD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peanutz View Post
    I will never be a good politician.
    I can't lie
    Can't you? Right guys.....get the questions ready..."How big are your...."
    Keith - Administrator


  8. #38
    Respected Member Peanutz's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Win2Win View Post
    Can't you? Right guys.....get the questions ready..."How big are your...."
    Hhhmmppp! Can you be more specific?




    'We dance in a circle and suppose, while the secret sits in the middle and knows'

    R.F.


  9. #39
    Respected Member ervenescence's Avatar
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    Being educated is not just base on being in a school or having a good degree. Being educated is not only taught at any schools but an individual themselves can educate their own, like having an educated manners or being cultured. Education usually starts at home or how you being raised by your parents.
    There is always death and taxes; however, death doesn't get worse every year.


  10. #40
    Respected Member alicat's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ervenescence View Post
    Being educated is not just base on being in a school or having a good degree. Being educated is not only taught at any schools but an individual themselves can educate their own, like having an educated manners or being cultured. Education usually starts at home or how you being raised by your parents.


  11. #41
    andypaul's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ervenescence View Post
    Being educated is not just base on being in a school or having a good degree. Being educated is not only taught at any schools but an individual themselves can educate their own, like having an educated manners or being cultured. Education usually starts at home or how you being raised by your parents.
    Word to the Evre

    My Wife improved her English skills at home with study books, mp3's cds, Watching BBC news and British Films and any other dvds for example BBC programes so she learned English and didn't start writing sidewalk, automobile and color.
    If she had gone to a college course in phill most likely she would have learned an american dialect which would have not been so useful in west london.


  12. #42
    Respected Member ervenescence's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by andypaul View Post
    Word to the Evre
    Erve po mister Andy..lol

    not Evre
    There is always death and taxes; however, death doesn't get worse every year.


  13. #43
    andypaul's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ervenescence View Post
    Erve po mister Andy..lol

    not Evre

    Whoops

    Its the excitment of the Snow sorry


  14. #44
    Administrator KeithD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by andypaul View Post
    Whoops
    Just dropped one eh?
    Keith - Administrator


  15. #45
    andypaul's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Win2Win View Post
    Just dropped one eh?
    you could smell it over in sunny wales


  16. #46
    Respected Member PeterB's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chino View Post
    I think i will put her though some form of college...

    ... though their is nothing wrong with a long engagement!
    As long as you aren't the one to teach her English!

    Don't worry too much about the education - Ruby dropped out of college to go and earn money to support her family. She was 23 y/o when we married (almost two months ago!).


  17. #47
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    Hi Chino, a bottle of wine can release emotions that's for sure
    I have a few thoughts which I hope may help

    Quote Originally Posted by chino View Post
    I don't know if i love her....

    They say if you don't know you are in love you are not in love, it is something you can't stop - like a runaway train. This should be the basis for everything.... If everyone were honest they would probably admit that they have made BIG mistakes if a relationship is not based on love

    i always think of her but 2 things bug me.. one my family will not approve and two she is not well educated

    Isn't it supposed to be about love, which beats EVERY problem?
    People make BIG mistakes if love is not the basis of relationship, I know I have. It doesn't matter what her past was, people can change and move on if their new life is important enough to them As someone mentioned take time................ to think, hope this helps


  18. #48
    Respected Member chino's Avatar
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    thanks for your comments... shark

    We planned on getting married in 2011 so i will stand by her until then... I will then bring her over for 6 months and if all goes to plan i will go back to the PI to marry her.


  19. #49
    Respected Member chino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PeterB View Post
    As long as you aren't the one to teach her English!
    Yes my english is not the best after a drink or two...

    Thinking about it my english is not the best any of the time


  20. #50
    andypaul's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chino View Post
    thanks for your comments... shark

    We planned on getting married in 2011 so i will stand by her until then... I will then bring her over for 6 months and if all goes to plan i will go back to the PI to marry her.
    Blimey you got a flow chart for that Only joking that sounds like your doing the right thing only fools rush in and you both need to get to know one another

    Like i wrote before just make sure your mahal understands the dates the Wife and her realtives i notice will go yup yup and then ask me why certain things are happening alittle later

    From what my Wife has told me due to the slower pace of life, 2011 seems to be far further away than it is with our hertic scheuldes.


  21. #51
    Respected Member chino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by andypaul View Post
    Blimey you got a flow chart for that Only joking that sounds like your doing the right thing only fools rush in and you both need to get to know one another

    Like i wrote before just make sure your mahal understands the dates the Wife and her realtives i notice will go yup yup and then ask me why certain things are happening alittle later

    From what my Wife has told me due to the slower pace of life, 2011 seems to be far further away than it is with our hertic scheuldes.
    Well she wants 2009... i said 2011 and we "worked it out" that 2011 is ok if we get engaged this year. When i get back In Oct i have to go and buy her an engagement ring, i cannot select one as she like yellow gold and i hate yellow gold.

    I am not rushing in... i tell you that but i have not told my parents yet but i have a long time to do that plus i don't think i will be in England then.


  22. #52
    Respected Member Piamed's Avatar
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    Hi Chino. I agree with so much that has already been said here. I am slightly concerned that you were 'forced' on a date though. No one should be able to force you to do anything.

    I think helping her get an education will bring many advantages. Firstly, it gives your lady something to lean on so she does not need to fall back to being a BG. Secondly, there are so many invaluable experience that can be derived from being around others from various backgrounds with with a common vision (e.g. This forum).

    I don't think we should judge anyone at all as we are not in their shoes. Sure we can all say she she should not have done that but could have gotten a job in Jollibee or something but we don't know her perception of her options.

    I do believe people can over come their pasts to varying degrees.

    Many years ago a friend of mine met and dated someone that made Halle Berry look ordinary. For a couple of months he dated this 'model'. She was the epitome of femininity, elegance, grace and charm. It was a real shock when we were all out and bumped into a group of loud girls in the City of London and it turned out his gf worked in a Strip Bar with them.

    How he struggled. He now had strong feelings for her and she offered many reasons for why she had hidden her work from him. I never imagined he would be in a relationship with a stripper. By now she was living in his house as she had experienced some money problems. She became his own live-in financial hemorrhage. She went home to Portugal on a modeling contract for 6 months, when she returned she was 3 months pregnant

    I'm not saying it will happen to you. Just an example.

    T
    Be responsible with little so that you can be trusted with much!!
    _____________________


  23. #53
    Respected Member chino's Avatar
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    thanks for the info... i have made my mind up.... she did not force me to set a date though she did bring up the idea of marriage... would / will i marry her yes but not for a while.... i will have to see how it goes.

    Still in contact daily by phone and booked a flight to see her in Oct plus i get a week in August too


  24. #54
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    As someone who first married at 22 I don't think 25 is at all too young. It depends on whether it is right for you both, age means nothing really. I also don't think anyone should condemn any girl in the Philippines for working in a bar. Indeed some of the nicest, caring and family orientated girls take on this work as the only way they can earn the money they need to help the ones they love. Of course some do it as the easy option, so only you can judge the quality of your partner. I have heard of several very successful marriages when an ex pat met a girl in a bar, took her out and she never went back.


  25. #55
    Respected Member keithAngel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Peanutz View Post
    Hhhmmppp! Can you be more specific?


    Errr Peanuts


  26. #56
    Respected Member chino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by David House View Post
    As someone who first married at 22 I don't think 25 is at all too young. It depends on whether it is right for you both, age means nothing really. I also don't think anyone should condemn any girl in the Philippines for working in a bar. Indeed some of the nicest, caring and family orientated girls take on this work as the only way they can earn the money they need to help the ones they love. Of course some do it as the easy option, so only you can judge the quality of your partner. I have heard of several very successful marriages when an ex pat met a girl in a bar, took her out and she never went back.
    Thanks for some very kind and wise words!


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