An eventful weekend one might say.
As you know I'd be suffering over my relationship with my Filipina gf who I have known for just a month.
In that time I have sent sent money and goods (digital camera) to the value of £428.38 (29,914.79 PHP). That was not something I could keep up as a self-employed individual particularly as April is always my worst month of the year and this year is no different.
I think I owe you all an explanation as you have been so kind in offering advice from "hang in there" to "get out now" to "go to Manila". I favoured the latter option but realistically it wasn't going to happen for a while and I couldn't stand the pressure that was building up in my mind.
We chatted on Saturday but she called it off after a short time saying she was unwell. This was due to stress bought on by her situation.
On Saturday night when I was going to bed, I prayed for guidance.
During the night, I dreamt about the film "The Exorcist" which I thought was weird as I have not seen that film for quite some time. When I got up on Sunday, I pondered whether this was sign from on high that I was been taken for a ride.
On Sunday morning, my gf was online looking quite well and we chatted. She said she was still unwell and wondered how she might buy medicine. I said that I had no money to send her and she said "OK". However, the mention of money registered with me.
We chatted some more and then she said her friend had left her alone with the PC and she would "do a show 4 me", which she did. She pulled off her top and she was not wearing a bra, which at 46" was pretty obvious even with her top on. This surprised me a little because it sort of indicated that she was used to stripping off. During the session I thought she was looking off to someone but it's hard to say. Also, I thought it possible she had more than one screen because her eyes would look to my right sometimes.
Anyway, we said goodbye to each other and that we would take again later.
Afterwards, I printed out the full record of our conversations on YM and read through them with a yellow highlighter. While a lot of our conversations were lovely, the frequent mention of money was a common thread - not everyday but often enough.
I then added up what it had cost me so far.
Then I decided to do something that someone had suggested in this thread and that was to send her an e-mail using a dormant account I had with Hotmail. In the e-mail I posed as an Aussie looking for a good time online. After a few hours, receiving no reply to my e-mail, it suddenly dawned on me that the e-mail may have shown it came from me. Sure enough, there was my name as plain as day as the sender. Stupid me!
At that point, I realised that was the end.
Since then, we have not communicated either via e-mail or YM and I''ll be surprised if we do.
I'm battling with the thoughts that I have misjudged a lovely poor girl and feel the need to make a big apology, BUT my head tells me to leave things as they are for financial reasons if nothing else.
What lessons have I learnt:
If someone asks you three times if you are on YM in your first encounter, be suspicious.
If you are the type of person who wants to trust people instinctively and are not strong on skepticism, then do not get too friendly with people right away.
If your gf manages to get online at a variety of different locations - all well lit - and with reasonable webcams - be suspicious.
If you gf, who claims to be very shy, can strip without an iota of shyness and is very good at doing what she does, whilst claiming to be a virgin, be suspicious.
If she can type out the words "i love u" several times in a couple of seconds, then you know that a key on her keyboard has been pre-programmed. Be suspicious.
If she insist on calling you "honey" or "hun" instead of your own name, then be suspicious that she calls everyone that so she doesn't confuse herself. Be suspicious.
Now I realise that none of what I have said is proof of anything but it leads me to the painful conclusion that I have been the victim of very clever and sophisticated scamming. Her e-mails to me answering my concerns and the letter from her mother were very convincing and I felt from the heart and that still bothers me a lot. However, enough is enough. I won't allow myself
to fall for this sort of situation again.
I'm delighted that those of you who have a loving relationship with a beautiful Filipina do so and I would never suggest for a moment that all Filipinas are like this.
My first love are Japanese women and I shall stick to that in future.
In conclusion, ley me say it before you do:
I AM BONKERS!