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Thread: Slow down guys!!!!

  1. #1
    Respected Member Eljohno's Avatar
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    Slow down guys!!!!

    I am writing this because too many times i have seen guys meet someone online and within a few days or weeks after hearing a sob story story send money over as they say they have fallen "in love"

    I think when anyone meets someone from the Philippines online its best to take your time, do not send money no matter what the story you get until you have visited and got to know the person well enough to know they are genuine...

    It is too easy to make decisions on how we are feeling about the person instead of letting the feelings grow into love and then being in a better position to make the right choices..

    I realise its not easy for some guys when they go online and get loads of attention from beautiful Filipino girls and because of their beauty they tend to just accept whatever is said to them as the truth..

    There are plenty of beautiful geniune women in the Philippines but also they are scammers who are there just to get money of people, some are married and using the internet as a form of income and some are gay men pretending to be women by putting false photos on their web page..

    I really wish that anyone who was going to chat online would find this site first so that they would not lose loads of money and have their hearts broken.

    So my advice is "Slow down"


  2. #2
    Respected Member gracia143's Avatar
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    That's a really prudent piece of advice.
    The bravest thing that men do is love women--Mort Sahl


  3. #3
    andypaul's Avatar
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    Like Eljohno says seen many blokes come off badly on this site, oter sites and a few in person in phill.

    When the missus and I were in Boracay we saw a whole group of older guys with far younger girls walking along in front of us. The missus could hear them joking about the blokes and basically comparing how they had done them over.
    The missus was embrassed to say the least, when i asked why she was shocked at what the ladies were saying.


  4. #4
    Respected Member bornatbirth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by andypaul View Post
    Like Eljohno says seen many blokes come off badly on this site, oter sites and a few in person in phill.

    When the missus and I were in Boracay we saw a whole group of older guys with far younger girls walking along in front of us. The missus could hear them joking about the blokes and basically comparing how they had done them over.
    The missus was embrassed to say the least, when i asked why she was shocked at what the ladies were saying.
    what was they saying?

    isnt it called common sense,to meet online and to go and see her,become bf/gf and then start helping out when u can?

    simple fact every girl can use some extra cash,isnt it upto the guys to decide if they want to or not?
    and why shouldnt a girl take there money?


  5. #5
    Respected Member chino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by andypaul View Post
    Like Eljohno says seen many blokes come off badly on this site, oter sites and a few in person in phill.

    When the missus and I were in Boracay we saw a whole group of older guys with far younger girls walking along in front of us. The missus could hear them joking about the blokes and basically comparing how they had done them over.
    The missus was embrassed to say the least, when i asked why she was shocked at what the ladies were saying.
    I think they were all Pok Pok

    I was in Cebu with my GF and she did not like Cebu so much as where we stayed everyone thought she was a pok pok


  6. #6
    Moderator joebloggs's Avatar
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    good words of wisdom, but for many it will fall on deaf ears and too late for many , but a warning to newbies

    if i knew what it was going to cost me over the years, maybe i would never have helped her out , it's easy to get sucked in, and feel there is no way out

    anyway i got my own back, i married her just waiting til she gets a good paid job, and i've got the spot ready for me 42inch plasma tv that her wages will buy


  7. #7
    Respected Member chino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by joebloggs View Post
    just waiting til she gets a good paid job, and i've got the spot ready for me 42inch plasma tv that her wages will buy
    Is everyone not the same?


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    Quote Originally Posted by joebloggs View Post
    good words of wisdom, but for many it will fall on deaf ears and too late for many , but a warning to newbies

    if i knew what it was going to cost me over the years, maybe i would never have helped her out , it's easy to get sucked in, and feel there is no way out

    anyway i got my own back, i married her just waiting til she gets a good paid job, and i've got the spot ready for me 42inch plasma tv that her wages will buy
    Her being a Doc... It might well be that the only plasma you get is intravenous....

    I am finding out that it is extremely difficult to separate a pinay from her earned cash....


  9. #9
    Respected Member bornatbirth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by aromulus View Post
    Her being a Doc... It might well be that the only plasma you get is intravenous....

    I am finding out that it is extremely difficult to separate a pinay from her earned cash....
    thats funny my gf doesnt have a problem taking mine,maybe i should tell her i earn less?


  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by bornatbirth View Post
    thats funny my gf doesnt have a problem taking mine,maybe i should tell her i earn less?
    Pinay philosophy....

    What's hers, it is definitively hers....

    What's mine, it is also hers........

    Heads, she wins... Tails, I lose......


  11. #11
    Respected Member LEAHnew's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by aromulus View Post
    Pinay philosophy....

    What's hers, it is definitively hers....

    What's mine, it is also hers........

    Heads, she wins... Tails, I lose......
    Korek ka Diyan


  12. #12
    Moderator joebloggs's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by aromulus View Post
    Pinay philosophy....

    What's hers, it is definitively hers....

    What's mine, it is also hers........

    Heads, she wins... Tails, I lose......
    tell me about it dom, for 6years she asked me to send money for this , that, and everythnig but a kitchen sink, when sometimes i would ask, do you really need it, she would say its only money ,

    but how things have changed now she works, i get moaned at a bit, when i ask for most of her wages ( to pay the bills and send money back to her family)

    at least she keeps some for herself, i have nowt left a the end of the month

    so beware filipina should come with a bank and gov health warning... you've been warned.


  13. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by joebloggs View Post
    send money for this , that, and everythnig but a kitchen sink,
    Did one better.........

    Jet had a couple of "projects".....
    1 - New outside kazy... with all the mod cons... bar the running water....

    2 - Tiled with crazy paving the front and back yards at her place.....

    Fair do's, she knows a bargain and everything was done on the quiet....
    I only found out last time I went over, for the weddding, because she was proud to show me...

    #3 - Will be getting the running water to the kazy.... But she is saving up herself for that.


  14. #14
    Moderator joebloggs's Avatar
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    i think much of what i sent to the misses, went somewhere else and not to her, maybe her family , i'm sure some of them, when they found out she was serious with a whitey, that they had an image in their heads, that we were all rich and had money to throw around, and I think they would tell her emotional and sob stories to pressure on her to ask me for money.the misses will do more for her family than herself, like i said there is no way she spent the money on herself...

    i paid her uni fees to, the amount of money i've sent, i dont want to think about over the last 7yrs, it's a lot.. many £10k's

    so be warned you marry a filipina your married to her family to

    oh ive got nothing against helping her family, i'm paying for her cousin to goto uni, i'm more than willing to pay for that, but you have to keep tight control of your money, before it gets out of hand


  15. #15
    Respected Member LEAHnew's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Eljohno View Post
    I am writing this because too many times i have seen guys meet someone online and within a few days or weeks after hearing a sob story story send money over as they say they have fallen "in love"

    I think when anyone meets someone from the Philippines online its best to take your time, do not send money no matter what the story you get until you have visited and got to know the person well enough to know they are genuine...

    It is too easy to make decisions on how we are feeling about the person instead of letting the feelings grow into love and then being in a better position to make the right choices..

    I realise its not easy for some guys when they go online and get loads of attention from beautiful Filipino girls and because of their beauty they tend to just accept whatever is said to them as the truth..

    There are plenty of beautiful geniune women in the Philippines but also they are scammers who are there just to get money of people, some are married and using the internet as a form of income and some are gay men pretending to be women by putting false photos on their web page..

    I really wish that anyone who was going to chat online would find this site first so that they would not lose loads of money and have their hearts broken.

    So my advice is "Slow down"
    Very Well said Sir...

    btw a notice of cake below
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY
    God Bless you and your family,

    cheers,
    Leah & Chris


  16. #16
    Moderator joebloggs's Avatar
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    oh i forgot

    its me birthday today

    oh i stopped counting many years ago


  17. #17
    Respected Member chino's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by joebloggs View Post

    so beware filipina should come with a bank and gov health warning... you've been warned.
    Noted

    Happy bithday ElJohn


  18. #18
    Respected Member Eljohno's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by chino View Post
    Noted

    Happy bithday ElJohn
    Thank you very much, just back from a nice meal with my wife and daughter!!!!


  19. #19
    Respected Member kimmi's Avatar
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    Very good advice, Kuya John..and Happy Happy Natal Day...


  20. #20
    Respected Member Eljohno's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by kukurokuk View Post
    Very Well said Sir...

    btw a notice of cake below
    HAPPY BIRTHDAY
    God Bless you and your family,

    cheers,
    Leah & Chris

    Thanks for the cake i will share it with the family lol


  21. #21
    Respected Member Eljohno's Avatar
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    Even after you have taken your time getting to know someone and then getting married its so annoying that everyone, family, friends & strangers think we are so rich and put loads of pressure on your wife to help with money. I know my wife has not told me a fraction of the people who actually asked her for money.


  22. #22
    andypaul's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by bornatbirth View Post
    what was they saying?

    isnt it called common sense,to meet online and to go and see her,become bf/gf and then start helping out when u can?

    simple fact every girl can use some extra cash,isnt it upto the guys to decide if they want to or not?
    and why shouldnt a girl take there money?

    I think this was them discuss the ways they coned money a little different to getting your partner to treat you nice.

    I think it was the lies they were telling to gain money which disturbed her more.

    If your Girlfriend or wife lied to you about emgencies and that her boyfriend/husband you didn't know about was one of those that benefited you might be a little gutted.


  23. #23
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    For me courting is very important in a relationship,it is very important to know if what are the likes and dislikes of the girl or the boy that you are going to court to,for you to be able to make the first move.As an advice it is very important to put God in the center of your relationship. Because if you do that no matter what trials may come i know that for sure you may conquire it all.Just always remember that in relationship you need respect to each other order for love to last forever.


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    Wiser but not a little embarrassed

    Reading all that I'd written about my situation on this site from the perspective of what I now know, I'm feeling pretty stupid. But not to kick myself too hard, I guess I had to learn the hard way.

    I'm still in touch with my girl. I assumed over time that she would see that I intend to be around for awhile, that I am a stand up, dependable guy. But I'm more realistic about things, knowing I'm not the first to have this sort of relationship with her. I shouldn't have expected to enlighten her about what a swell guy I am. And I see now that, because she doesn't have the physical virtues of a lot of girls, she plays on making guys feel sorry for her; it's a nice, dependable guy that she looks to jerk around. That's her forte.

    After nearly breaking the bank here in HK, I no longer send money. Whereas before I would give--perhaps she really does need money for her mother's asthma medicine--I no longer see her performances as convincing to the degree of being worthy of Oscar nominations. Now, because of her frustration with me, they've become melodrama. About her recent request for money for medicine for her fever--she sounded fine on the phone--she tells me that next time I call she might be dead.

    Don't get me wrong. I'm still empathetic about her situation. But at the same time I have tried to stop seeing her poverty relative to my own comparative wealth. Though things are definitely tough--and getting tougher--in the Philippines, people there are used to it and get by somehow. She tougher than I thought she was.

    I'm not optimistic about where this is going. Yes, I will take it slower next time.


  25. #25
    Respected Member marylen's Avatar
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    ye just be wiser and cautious to all ladies/woman out in the middle of nowhere...building a deep relationship is a must and on top of the list....if there is money involves you never can detect how sincere or serious she is ...more focus on getting to know each other first, just needs an open up understanding towards the situation, if a girl talks about some kind of problem(which that is out of control ) there is no problem to a man to lend over his ear and listen up to what girl have said but to the extend of giving up all without knowing everything out yet thats another side of the story..........so many girls out here in our place used the internet chat to be source of their income, its okay maybe if they were serious in finding out one but they were just trying to fooled out almost some foreigners who them get involved with., telling some lies, asking for a big amount of and make some blame excuses for any sole purposes..i may not judging them but am just trying to be honest and let others aware of any kinds ...so pity of the man to be fooled out and losing his money with no used at all . I once witnessed when some girl chatting with a foreign men on the public cafe accompanied by her lil child, yea for sure she never tells any that she was married and have a child as well....even her husband was there infront of helping her out on how to victimize innocent foreign men . I so feel pity towards any foreign who undergone the same thing which of course I can't dare to think to be in the same situation...........just first enjoy getting to know well...meet in real, better know her family as well and what type of people she gets acquainted with....just don't jump into conclusion yet, a lot more girls who tried to be acted as if shes too innocent but then at the later date she possess to be something different off on cam...So if you were looking for something serious and intend to settle down in time, do look for a better deal( i mean a better one individual that you can trusted with) only you can find it out, just follow your instinct and don't let yourself fooled into...you to avoid get hurt later on.....
    My husband started to send me off a bit cash from then when we were in our four months of relationship....luckily i got my own pc at home which hes not the one whose paying it but i got it before him but just that i wasn't connected with a monthly internet yet that time...so still i need of cash but i didnt ask for any for I am quite so shy...well then for as long he stick by me and sincere of all his actions it doesnt matter if hes going to send me or not...his love and presence on cam is already a big part of me...so am proudly to say that were almost in 3 yrs of relationship and just got married this month...we take things slowly but no regrets after the long journey.



    A lot more girls but just be careful in choosing whose among of them...........


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