All gone wrong since the Marriage.

[rabb5it]

[QUOTE=sweet_cookie08;66534]Hi Mick..

So sad to hear your story. What's the update?

Just want to ask you about your wedding. Are you really sure that you had a LEGAL wedding? Did you went to getting a marriage license, attending a seminar and taking oath infront of the local registrar official? You need to know first if what you had was valid.. If it is not valid then you need to plan the next step you need to take.

Very good point sweetcookie. Mick, my previous text omitted to state that your first task is to investigate if the marriage is legal. With a bit of luck it may not be. Jot down all the facts & procedures that you went through & take this & any documentation you have to your solicitor to investigate.

rabb5it

[KeithD]

With a bit of luck it may not be.
rabb5it

I wouldn't call getting marreid and the wife going missing straight after, and maybe finding out the marriage wasn't legal after all 'Luck'!

[ginapeterb]

Ian's point is very valid, reading between the lines I am starting to agree with him, was she pressurized into marriage to you, so that Munting Hiling could start.

Western benefactors or financier's are sorely needed to solve urgent and life threatening requests.

Her father may be putting pressure on her now to obtain a regular allowance for the family, she may have gone away for a few days on holiday, especially if you left her with 3 months money, that is like giving them a huge bonus at christmas.

But then again, why no contact with you, if she was in arguments with the Tatay about being pushed into asking you for money, then why no contact with you.

Time is the key here, it will sort itself out in time, as they say, everything has its own time in the Philippines, or is that Thailand ?

[edentony]

Hello mick have you now resolved this, i hope you can post an update

[Sangoma]

It does all sound very strange, it may be worth paying a PI to check it out.

[Sangoma]

Just some thoughts.

If you have any suspicions that it is a scam, why not post a profile, ie her first name, brothers, sisters, cousins and parents first names. Where she lives (town name not address!) what she does, what other often spoken about family members do etc.

This information would be meaningless and of no use to anyone whoi did not already know her, but from what I was reading the other day, scammers re-use the same story, so it would ring a bell with anyone else she spoke to.

There are hundreds of people who only read forums like this without posting, so it could get to a wide audience.

[aposhark]

Hi Mick,

Such a shame

I think she had a change of heart shortly after the wedding and decided to scam you.

I would cut and run and not send another penny.

She has a LOT to make up to you financially and emotionally, but I cannot see her doing either, she will try to keep you on a hook as there could be money in it for her.

Move on Mick, there are so many lovely Filipinas and also from any place.
Take your time and wait for something nice to happen in your life.

All the best in whatever you do

[trina]

i feel sorry about your situation....

[rikyandnina]

hi mick,

can't believe a PINAY has done this to you. its devastating and she is giving the rest of us a bad name. I hope you don't give up on love. its the only true religion that you should have faith in these days. believe someone is out there for you. i did and we're together for 5 years now.

hope your story turns out ok. i hope for the best

[allyn]

i realy feel sorry on your worries about your wife right now..

when i was in the philippines, and when my phone is been taken off by my brother from me (he fancy my phone) and my hubby cant reach me for a whole day he is already freaking out....
He called my mom in hk, my sister and even my neighbor, and ask where iam and why i cant be reach...what more if its 2 week...

just try to contact all her relatives, specially the most close one...

you gone thru lots of things just for her i hope everything will be fine with you and her soon....

take care...cheers!!

[PeterB]

I haven't spent time on the forum for some months, so have only spotted this thread.

This was the first thing which struck me as being odd:

she really wanted to marry in a catholic church, but because I had been divorced settled on a civil wedding service with a judge.

I know that the Catholic Church does not officially marry divorcees, but for many years, the decision has been left to the local priest. If she was so keen on a church wedding, I would expect her to be familiar with the priest. Ruby and I had very little difficulty in organising a church wedding.

This, alone, made me wonder whether the 'civil' ceremony was a 'set up'.

However, assuming that it was a legal wedding, there are a number of scenarios which might lead to a new wife to cease contact ... but, as time goes by, it looks worse and worse! :(

[vbkelly]

church wedding and civil wedding are all legal as long as you register your mc from local registry to NSO

[PeterB]

church wedding and civil wedding are all legal as long as you register your mc from local registry to NSO

Sure, but it would be easier to 'stage' a fake civil wedding.

[giants]

So sad to hear to story mate. But it sounds like a scam to me. Her family don't know where she is? Sound dodgy to me. But I wish you luck.....

But come to think of it....I won't spent 2-3 years building a relationship and get married just to scam you and just take away 3 months allowance and a visa fee.....if she is a family oriented Filipina it could be that she fear of leaving her family behind and leave with you here in UK, that's why she runaway....cause if I will do scam then I should be squeezing every penny you have and have you send it to me before I go hiding....

[maria_and_matt]

hey mick, i hope you have resolved your problem now and your back in contact with your wife.. wish you all the best!

[jackmac452]

Hi Mick, I hope everything works out well for you..you have our sincere wishes everything works out well for you both...take care..

[mickcant]

Hi iI did send two updates today Sunday 7th September
I got to where things are now becose after six weeks without contact she wanted money its all in the 2 post above.
Mick

[ginapeterb]

well its thats the story, wanting money without 6 weeks contact, i am sure you told her where to go, This business about the Internet Scam loosing your hard earned money is a big beautiful red flag, she is a dead duck Mick, a monkey on your shoulder, toss the monkey away and start again, I hope you have a copy of the foreign marriage certificate Mick ? if not...get one from the NSO, or pay someone to obtain one, then you should be able to get the foreign marriage annulled here in UK pretty quickly, best of luck.

[mickcant]

Hi all, it has been some months since i last posted, yes i do now have a marriage certificate from the NSO and all seems legal.

My wife is working in Manila, and said in one of her rare texts that she is working to make the visa money she spent back up, and that she is trying to support her siblinga as well, she will not say how much she has towords the visa interview or if she has applied for one.

It is now six months since our marriage, she will not use email since the marriage so we have no proof of our limited contact, is there a time limit on arranging the interview? we did fill out the online applacation while i was still there with her, could she get through a interview after a six month gap?

I do have an appointment to see a solicitor here in the UK in two weeks, could i get an annoulment on the grounds of her not going for the visa interview even though i had given her more than enough to cover all the cost.

I do reasise she could never be trusted if we were together here both with money and for the many lies she has told me.
Thanks,
Mick Cant.

[aromulus]

I think that other forum members will agree with me on this, mate.

The situation you find yourself in, is very sad and unfortunate.
We won't know for sure wether you have been a victim of an elaborate scam or not.

In the absence of absolute proof, either way, I would err on the side of caution, end all contact and start divorce proceedings in the UK.

But obviously the ultimate decision rests with you
Which ever way you decide to act, we will understand and not pass judgement.

Good luck.

[Alan]

I think that other forum members will agree with me on this, mate.

The situation you find yourself in, is very sad and unfortunate.
We won't know for sure wether you have been a victim of an elaborate scam or not.

In the absence of absolute proof, either way, I would err on the side of caution, end all contact and start divorce proceedings in the UK.

But obviously the ultimate decision rests with you
Which ever way you decide to act, we will understand and not pass judgement.

Good luck.

Mick,

Wise words from Aromulus.

Whatever happens though, you have good friends on here. If you are ever down, talk to us - we are here to support.

Good luck!

Al.

[eljean]

Well,she seems like sticking up with you for money...you just got married and everything and then why does she started going away from her family and cut off all contacts, i don't think she can repay you from the money she lost and i don't think so that she lose it on internet scam,i don't like manila it is so expensive to live therewhat kind of job she got?
Obviously, she got more reasons than will sadly, it only mean one things she not interested about you trust me my husband only send me visa payment and and he pays for my fare to england and some travel expenses to CFO seminar but thats it...i think 1,100 pound is way so early for you to send it to her especially when she hasn't even the documents required yet for visaprobably she's living like a pro with it...

[reginacarlson]

That's really terrible! I suggest you cease all contact with her and try not to be swayed to any of her lies and financial problems. Never give her money again. She definitely cannot be trusted!

[mickcant]

Thank you Eijaen and all for your support.
She is working in a mobile phone sales call center, she also says she needs to support her siblings as home.
I left the visa money with her when i returned back here after the honeymoon, as i thought she was going to have an interview as soon as possible, then of course she broke contct.

I am over the worst now but foir the first weeks I thought I was going out of my mind.
Thanks again, Mick.

[Toyang]

Im sad to read your story Mick, but at least you found out her real motive before she get there to UK. Thre are worse experience I ve heard, such as the young girl who divorced her British husband after she got her ILR and that has been her planned to marry her Filipino BF and bring to UK. Im sure there still a lot of Filipina with a good heart and deserve your love and care. Goodluck to you Mick.

[eljean]

I know you don't think about the money that cost you, but the best thing such as trust and love is what you've lose...i just want you to know that there is plenty you can find a good and well just beware of some like her...goodluck

[joebloggs]

such as the young girl who divorced her British husband after she got her ILR and that has been her planned to marry her Filipino BF and bring to UK.

if he had evidence that she used deception to get ILR, then her ILR could be revoked.

[russ01539]

Hi Mick.

I have spent the last hour reading your thread. Its a strange, weird and fascinating story, and I really feel for you in this situation.

It think even you will agree the clock is ticking for you and you want hapiness, dont we all. Well Mick I hope you get through the rest of this process painlessly and then move on. You have plenty of experience now so hopefully won't get scammed again, so happy days ahead. I am sure everyone in the forum shares my sentinments.

Good Luck.

[aposhark]

Hello again Mickcant

Do you know anyone there who is in contact with her?
Does this person have a phone number that you can call?
Does anyone now know where she actually is?

Can someone go to see her to tell her how concerned you are and to implore her to speak with you? They should take a phone with them together with your number and ask her to speak with you. He/she should tell her face-to-face that all will be ok with you but she must speak with you.

This is still VERY strange.

Hope you get some answers soon.
If you don't you will have to go over to find her and sort things out.
You need to get help from someone in her family, someone has got to know something.