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Thread: All gone wrong since the Marriage.

  1. #31
    Respected Member Sangoma's Avatar
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    It does all sound very strange, it may be worth paying a PI to check it out.


  2. #32
    Respected Member Sangoma's Avatar
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    Just some thoughts.

    If you have any suspicions that it is a scam, why not post a profile, ie her first name, brothers, sisters, cousins and parents first names. Where she lives (town name not address!) what she does, what other often spoken about family members do etc.

    This information would be meaningless and of no use to anyone whoi did not already know her, but from what I was reading the other day, scammers re-use the same story, so it would ring a bell with anyone else she spoke to.

    There are hundreds of people who only read forums like this without posting, so it could get to a wide audience.


  3. #33
    Respected Member allyn's Avatar
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    i realy feel sorry on your worries about your wife right now..

    when i was in the philippines, and when my phone is been taken off by my brother from me (he fancy my phone) and my hubby cant reach me for a whole day he is already freaking out....
    He called my mom in hk, my sister and even my neighbor, and ask where iam and why i cant be reach...what more if its 2 week...

    just try to contact all her relatives, specially the most close one...

    you gone thru lots of things just for her i hope everything will be fine with you and her soon....

    take care...cheers!!
    I know it seems hard sometimes, but remember one thing, through every dark night, there's a bright day after that. So no matter how hard it gets, keep your chest out, keep your head up and handle it...


  4. #34
    Respected Member trina's Avatar
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    i feel sorry about your situation....
    Matt & Trina Leach


  5. #35
    Respected Member PeterB's Avatar
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    I haven't spent time on the forum for some months, so have only spotted this thread.

    This was the first thing which struck me as being odd:
    Quote Originally Posted by mickcant View Post
    she really wanted to marry in a catholic church, but because I had been divorced settled on a civil wedding service with a judge.
    I know that the Catholic Church does not officially marry divorcees, but for many years, the decision has been left to the local priest. If she was so keen on a church wedding, I would expect her to be familiar with the priest. Ruby and I had very little difficulty in organising a church wedding.

    This, alone, made me wonder whether the 'civil' ceremony was a 'set up'.

    However, assuming that it was a legal wedding, there are a number of scenarios which might lead to a new wife to cease contact ... but, as time goes by, it looks worse and worse! :(


  6. #36
    Respected Member vbkelly's Avatar
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    church wedding and civil wedding are all legal as long as you register your mc from local registry to NSO


  7. #37
    Respected Member PeterB's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by vbkelly View Post
    church wedding and civil wedding are all legal as long as you register your mc from local registry to NSO
    Sure, but it would be easier to 'stage' a fake civil wedding.


  8. #38
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    So sad to hear to story mate. But it sounds like a scam to me. Her family don't know where she is? Sound dodgy to me. But I wish you luck.....

    But come to think of it....I won't spent 2-3 years building a relationship and get married just to scam you and just take away 3 months allowance and a visa fee.....if she is a family oriented Filipina it could be that she fear of leaving her family behind and leave with you here in UK, that's why she runaway....cause if I will do scam then I should be squeezing every penny you have and have you send it to me before I go hiding....


  9. #39
    Respected Member maria_and_matt's Avatar
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    hey mick, i hope you have resolved your problem now and your back in contact with your wife.. wish you all the best!


  10. #40
    Respected Member jackmac452's Avatar
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    Hi Mick, I hope everything works out well for you..you have our sincere wishes everything works out well for you both...take care..


  11. #41
    Member rikyandnina's Avatar
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    Smile

    hi mick,

    can't believe a PINAY has done this to you. its devastating and she is giving the rest of us a bad name. I hope you don't give up on love. its the only true religion that you should have faith in these days. believe someone is out there for you. i did and we're together for 5 years now.

    hope your story turns out ok. i hope for the best


  12. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by IainBusby View Post
    Reluctant to make love on the honeymoon!

    I find that part of your story very strange. It could well be that after you became involved with her and went to visit her, she came under pressure from her family to marry you even if she didn't really want to, so that they (the family) would have a western benefactor. This could explain why she is in hiding from both you and her family.

    I really do hope I am very wrong and that there is another explanation for her current behaviour and her behaviour during the honeymoon.

    Iain.
    I know this is really childish........ if it was a civil wedding with a judge...... was it legally registered ...or did you pay for a big party for the rellies, and the "judge" forgot to sort the paper workout.

    Just read a thread about solicitors over in Ph , being slightly off the centreline! Which sent my twisted little mind on this track!


  13. #43
    Trusted Member mickcant's Avatar
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    Up date from Mick Cant

    When my wife went missing at the same time as I had to return to the UK
    And of course I was frantic with worry, it turned out she had gone to Manila the day after me.
    I tried every way possible to contact her but she would not answer text messages and her phone was always off nor would she reply to emails.
    I do now know her sister knew where she was and that she had changed her phone number, which she contacted me with after about six weeks asking me to send money as she could not pay her rent.


    You may remember the Remember I put £200 into her bank account that was to pay for our honeymoon and when I wanted to draw it out most of it was missing so we had to change from Hong Kong to a resort in the Philippines.

    I gave her £1,100 to go to Manila for her visa interview, some of which was keep money for her at the time I wanted to put the visa interview money as a bankers cheque but she reacted and said I should trust her it turns out she now has said that she lost it all in an internet scam but did not say any details, only that is why she is working in Manila to make the money up.

    I know she cannot be trusted with money.

    Yesterday she sent a txt to ask for 3000 pesos because they were about to have the power cut off at home and she is not living there anyhow, I replied that I could not send any money and that it was her dads problem, what a cheek nobody else pays my bills. This also shows she has saved nothing for the visa or she would have used that. Mick.

    We have not emailed for 4 months, would she get through an embassy interview.
    I have told her I cannot pay the interview cost again if she was serious about us being together in the UK then she would not have used the money.
    We will not be getting together now she only contacts me to ask for money.
    I have not registered the wedding in the UK I was waiting to know she had the visa, does that mean the marriage is not recognized here?
    Thanks,

    Mick Cant


  14. #44
    Trusted Member mickcant's Avatar
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    Was the marriage legal

    Yes I have a copy of the CRS Form no 5 which i belive is the one she would have needed to take to the embassy.
    I arranged for an investagator to obtain it,
    Mick Cant.


  15. #45
    Respected Member vbkelly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mickcant View Post
    Yes I have a copy of the CRS Form no 5 which i belive is the one she would have needed to take to the embassy.
    I arranged for an investagator to obtain it,
    Mick Cant.
    goodluck hope have a result soon
    all things are possible!


  16. #46
    Respected Member ginapeterb's Avatar
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    Mick I have read your story again, what is the situation now, has anything come out of all of this, update us mate ? How did you get to where you are now ?


  17. #47
    Trusted Member mickcant's Avatar
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    Hi iI did send two updates today Sunday 7th September
    I got to where things are now becose after six weeks without contact she wanted money its all in the 2 post above.
    Mick


  18. #48
    Respected Member ginapeterb's Avatar
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    well its thats the story, wanting money without 6 weeks contact, i am sure you told her where to go, This business about the Internet Scam loosing your hard earned money is a big beautiful red flag, she is a dead duck Mick, a monkey on your shoulder, toss the monkey away and start again, I hope you have a copy of the foreign marriage certificate Mick ? if not...get one from the NSO, or pay someone to obtain one, then you should be able to get the foreign marriage annulled here in UK pretty quickly, best of luck.


  19. #49
    Respected Member Andy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mickcant View Post
    I have not registered the wedding in the UK I was waiting to know she had the visa, does that mean the marriage is not recognized here?
    Thanks,

    Mick Cant


    If a foreign marriage is recognised by the country it takes place in, the UK accepts it. You don't need to register a foreign marriage in the UK to get it recognised. You need to get a copy of the marriage certificate from the NSO to find out if the marriage is recognised in the Phils. You can request it online if you haven't got anyone in the Phils to get it for you. Once you've established whether or not you're married, then you can decide whether you want to get the marriage annuled or get a divorce.(hope the link below is OK to post)www.e-census.com.ph


  20. #50
    Trusted Member mickcant's Avatar
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    Hi all, it has been some months since i last posted, yes i do now have a marriage certificate from the NSO and all seems legal.

    My wife is working in Manila, and said in one of her rare texts that she is working to make the visa money she spent back up, and that she is trying to support her siblinga as well, she will not say how much she has towords the visa interview or if she has applied for one.

    It is now six months since our marriage, she will not use email since the marriage so we have no proof of our limited contact, is there a time limit on arranging the interview? we did fill out the online applacation while i was still there with her, could she get through a interview after a six month gap?

    I do have an appointment to see a solicitor here in the UK in two weeks, could i get an annoulment on the grounds of her not going for the visa interview even though i had given her more than enough to cover all the cost.

    I do reasise she could never be trusted if we were together here both with money and for the many lies she has told me.
    Thanks,
    Mick Cant.


  21. #51
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    I think that other forum members will agree with me on this, mate.

    The situation you find yourself in, is very sad and unfortunate.
    We won't know for sure wether you have been a victim of an elaborate scam or not.

    In the absence of absolute proof, either way, I would err on the side of caution, end all contact and start divorce proceedings in the UK.

    But obviously the ultimate decision rests with you
    Which ever way you decide to act, we will understand and not pass judgement.

    Good luck.


  22. #52
    Respected Member reginacarlson's Avatar
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    That's really terrible! I suggest you cease all contact with her and try not to be swayed to any of her lies and financial problems. Never give her money again. She definitely cannot be trusted!


  23. #53
    Respected Member Alan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by aromulus View Post
    I think that other forum members will agree with me on this, mate.

    The situation you find yourself in, is very sad and unfortunate.
    We won't know for sure wether you have been a victim of an elaborate scam or not.

    In the absence of absolute proof, either way, I would err on the side of caution, end all contact and start divorce proceedings in the UK.

    But obviously the ultimate decision rests with you
    Which ever way you decide to act, we will understand and not pass judgement.

    Good luck.
    Mick,

    Wise words from Aromulus.

    Whatever happens though, you have good friends on here. If you are ever down, talk to us - we are here to support.

    Good luck!

    Al.


  24. #54
    Respected Member eljean's Avatar
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    Well,she seems like sticking up with you for money...you just got married and everything and then why does she started going away from her family and cut off all contacts, i don't think she can repay you from the money she lost and i don't think so that she lose it on internet scam,i don't like manila it is so expensive to live therewhat kind of job she got?
    Obviously, she got more reasons than will sadly, it only mean one things she not interested about you trust me my husband only send me visa payment and and he pays for my fare to england and some travel expenses to CFO seminar but thats it...i think 1,100 pound is way so early for you to send it to her especially when she hasn't even the documents required yet for visaprobably she's living like a pro with it...
    Filipina a born survivor!


  25. #55
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    Hi Mick,

    Such a shame

    I think she had a change of heart shortly after the wedding and decided to scam you.

    I would cut and run and not send another penny.

    She has a LOT to make up to you financially and emotionally, but I cannot see her doing either, she will try to keep you on a hook as there could be money in it for her.

    Move on Mick, there are so many lovely Filipinas and also from any place.
    Take your time and wait for something nice to happen in your life.

    All the best in whatever you do


  26. #56
    Trusted Member mickcant's Avatar
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    Thank you Eijaen and all for your support.
    She is working in a mobile phone sales call center, she also says she needs to support her siblings as home.
    I left the visa money with her when i returned back here after the honeymoon, as i thought she was going to have an interview as soon as possible, then of course she broke contct.

    I am over the worst now but foir the first weeks I thought I was going out of my mind.
    Thanks again, Mick.


  27. #57
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    Im sad to read your story Mick, but at least you found out her real motive before she get there to UK. Thre are worse experience I ve heard, such as the young girl who divorced her British husband after she got her ILR and that has been her planned to marry her Filipino BF and bring to UK. Im sure there still a lot of Filipina with a good heart and deserve your love and care. Goodluck to you Mick.


  28. #58
    Respected Member eljean's Avatar
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    I know you don't think about the money that cost you, but the best thing such as trust and love is what you've lose...i just want you to know that there is plenty you can find a good and well just beware of some like her...goodluck
    Filipina a born survivor!


  29. #59
    Moderator joebloggs's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Toyang View Post
    such as the young girl who divorced her British husband after she got her ILR and that has been her planned to marry her Filipino BF and bring to UK.
    if he had evidence that she used deception to get ILR, then her ILR could be revoked.


  30. #60
    Respected Member russ01539's Avatar
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    Hi Mick.

    I have spent the last hour reading your thread. Its a strange, weird and fascinating story, and I really feel for you in this situation.

    It think even you will agree the clock is ticking for you and you want hapiness, dont we all. Well Mick I hope you get through the rest of this process painlessly and then move on. You have plenty of experience now so hopefully won't get scammed again, so happy days ahead. I am sure everyone in the forum shares my sentinments.

    Good Luck.
    Wena&Russ


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