Are you safe?

[Piamed]

Even prior to what happened to Pia last week, I was wondering if she is really safe in her own Barangay or even her own City.

While Pia was at University, I never went to meet her after class or anything as it was felt that people knowing about me might cause jealousy etc. with people in the school. Only her closest classmates knew about me. Since the wedding and me attending her graduation so many more people know.

Pia has even had people she does not know laughing and making sexually rude comments to her about me on the street. Others just recognise her as having a foreigner husband and talk to her about it. People see her differently now and sadly, life as she knew it has really changed forever. Pia was previously getting texts on her old mobile from complete strangers who would say things like, "I'm selling my car/house/lot and was given your number as someone said that you might buy it". Things have changed.

In a back drop of recent and attempted kidnappings of the mestiza children of foreigners, foreigner robberies and foreigner spouses being shot in their shop locally, the question is what can I do to protect Pia while I am here.

Tatay does not want Pia going out at the moment and other family members are concerned about her safety too and for the first time Pia is feeling that she is no longer able to be herself and free while there.

I wanted Pia to go to Nasipit to stay with her aunt until I go to meet her but obviously she wants to be at home, as she is concerned about her visa documents being successfully processed and sent back and wanting to be there if they are.

As much as I don't like the idea and I know she wont be keen either, I am seriously considering asking her to think about hiring a guard to sleep outside the house during the night and to escort her on the few occasions she will venture into the city proper. The guard would have to be low profile, which kinda defeats the purpose, so that neighbours don't know he's there. It's not a good idea as it would just reinforce the perception Pia is rich. As I said, I can see many things to dislike about that but had to consider it as I need Pia to be safe!

Have the ladies on here noticed that things have changed for them locally in terms of how they are now regarded and their feelings of being safe and how do you and your hubbies/bfs handle these issues?

[jencha8569]

honestly for me having or keeping my boyfriend is
kinda hard some things have changed and other
people's view for me.
Basically all of what pia been through and will be
going through is same to others who have a
foreigner boyfriend or husband or at some point
similar feelings. i know everywhere there is a crime but on
my city crime rate is low so i not encountered
roberry situation.
when my boyfriend was here we get attention
from the crowd and i know they only thinking 2
things 1st=money and 2nd= sex.
so what we do is ignore them then laugh about
those eyes
now that hes back in Uk all seem to be curious about
what will happen to us next. everybody asking same
old questions but i answer it politely and honestly
He worried too all the time me being here and him
far away from me. many things better be dealt
if we together but i say communication will play
a vital part on a long distance relationships.
we talk anything and everything been going on
our everyday life.
anyways, you can get a bodyguard for pia if its really
necessary. if she not comfy with it i suggest for her
not to go out alone anywhere and everywhere
especially if she getting money frombank or WU.
she can bring with her a cousin, aunt or
sibs.
just keep in touch with pia all the time all will be
fine

[LEAHnew]

Jen

Nice poem sis dyok lang

You'r right same here

[Piamed]

Hi amiga. You know, I met Pia in 2005 so have had a while to think about these things must confess that I never anticipated the fear she now has and the degree of concern I now have over her safety.

The curiosity things we certainly ignore when people are being rude, other times we make friends with people.

Communication is key. Pia and I speak on the phone on average about 6 times a day, send several texts and when her internet access was ok would chat maybe 3 hours plus.

What I need right now is to be there and to kick the proverbials of those that would threaten her. Fortunately for them, that's not possible for a range of common sense and practical reasons.

I don't think i will get a body guard for her as that will cause other issues. Pia has agreed to visit her aunt for a while. That is better for now I think.

God bless you!

[telford]

Even prior to what happened to Pia last week, I was wondering if she is really safe in her own Barangay let or even her own City.

While Pia was at University, I never went to meet her after class or anything as it was felt that people knowing about me might cause jealousy etc. with people in the school. Only her closest classmates knew about me. Since the wedding and me attending her graduation so many more people know.

Pia has even had people she does not know laughing and making sexually rude comments to her about me on the street. Others just recognise her as having a foreigner husband and talk to her about it. People see her differently now and sadly, life as she knew it has really changed forever. Pia was previously getting texts on her old mobile from complete strangers who would say things like, "I'm selling my car/house/lot and was given your number as someone said that you might buy it". Things have changed.

In a back drop of recent and attempted kidnappings of the mestiza children of foreigners, foreigner robberies and foreigner spouses being shot in their shop locally, the question is what can I do to protect Pia while I am here.

Tatay does not want Pia going out at the moment and other family members are concerned about her safety too and for the first time Pia is feeling that she is no longer able to be herself and free while there.

I wanted Pia to go to Nasipit to stay with her aunt until I go to meet her but obviously she wants to be at home, as she is concerned about her visa documents being successfully processed and sent back and wanting to be there if they are.

As much as I don't like the idea and I know she wont be keen either, I am seriously considering asking her to think about hiring a guard to sleep outside the house during the night and to escort her on the few occasions she will venture into the city proper. The guard would have to be low profile, which kinda defeats the purpose, so that neighbours don't know he's there. It's not a good idea as it would just reinforce the perception Pia is rich. As I said, I can see many things to dislike about that but had to consider it as I need Pia to be safe!

Have the ladies on here noticed that things have changed for them locally in terms of how they are now regarded and their feelings of being safe and how do you and your hubbies/bfs handle these issues?

hello there! I'm from Cabadbaran City,which is 28kms. away from Butuan City. My husband is staying with me here for more than a year now.never happen that we feel unsafe. There's already lots of foriegners staying here in Cabadbaran,but i never heard that they got treaten. There's even like an organizations of foriegners here that met every friday in Butuan City.
If ever you will get body guards for Pia,I think she will be the first girl of a foriegner with body guard. I try to have body guard before when my dad still a municipal mayor and that was the time of rebels (NPA's) but now, our place is safe already and no need for body guards.
just only a suggestion, why not buy her a gun? its easy to get a permit if you know somebody from the police or army. just for emergency purposes, that is if she feel really unsafe.

[Piamed]

hello there! I'm from Cabadbaran City,which is 28kms. away from Butuan City. My husband is staying with me here for more than a year now.never happen that we feel unsafe. There's already lots of foriegners staying here in Cabadbaran,but i never heard that they got treaten. There's even like an organizations of foriegners here that met every friday in Butuan City.
If ever you will get body guards for Pia,I think she will be the first girl of a foriegner with body guard. I try to have body guard before when my dad still a municipal mayor and that was the time of rebels (NPA's) but now, our place is safe already and no need for body guards.
just only a suggestion, why not buy her a gun? its easy to get a permit if you know somebody from the police or army. just for emergency purposes, that is if she feel really unsafe.

I have never felt unsafe, ever! I don't believe someone would have the confidence to pull a knife out on me - a gun maybe!

The NPA are in the hills around Surigao now. I have even seen them. They could even find the robbers but then you owe them and that creates other issues. Pia won't have a BG but she will go to stay with her aunty for a while.

A gun for Pia? Hala hala!!

[telford]

I have never felt unsafe, ever! I don't believe someone would have the confidence to pull a knife out on me - a gun maybe!

The NPA are in the hills around Surigao now. I have even seen them. They could even find the robbers but then you owe them and that creates other issues. Pia won't have a Bg but she will go to stay with her aunty for a while.

A gun for Pia? Hala hala!!

why hala hala! hahahha... actually i grow up with guns...... no need to be scared of it... i have permit to carry since i was still on my early 20's...

[Piamed]

why hala hala! hahahha... actually i grow up with guns...... no need to be scared of it... i have permit to carry since i was still on my early 20's...

Aaaaayyy! Does you hubby know that he married Buffy the robber slayer? From now on I will show you much more respect ma'am Hey, maybe you can be Pia's bodyguard!

[telford]

Aaaaayyy! Does you hubby know that he married Buffy the robber slayer? From now on I will show you much more respect ma'am Hey, maybe you can be Pia's bodyguard!

actually at first my husband was surprise when i show him my gun... he's asking me why i have it, i said just for safety purposes, he's a bit worried coz he thought that my place is so unsafe thats why i have it.and now he enjoy going out with my family, go on firing.but actually mostly familes here have gun, license or unlicense...
i will be her body guard? thats a nice idea... i can have extra income for my shopping...

[Piamed]

actually at first my husband was surprise when i show him my gun... he's asking me why i have it, i said just for safety purposes, he's a bit worried coz he thought that my place is so unsafe thats why i have it.and now he enjoy going out with my family, go on firing.but actually mostly familes here have gun, license or unlicense...
i will be her body guard? thats a nice idea... i can have extra income for my shopping...

have you noticed that your hubby never argues with you when you are near your gun?

Income? You want to get paid?

[jencha8569]

Hi amiga. You know, I met Pia in 2005 so have had a while to think about these things must confess that I never anticipated the fear she now has and the degree of concern I now have over her safety.

The curiosity things we certainly ignore when people are being rude, other times we make friends with people.

Communication is key. Pia and I speak on the phone on average about 6 times a day, send several texts and when her internet access was ok would chat maybe 3 hours plus.

What I need right now is to be there and to kick the proverbials of those that would threaten her. Fortunately for them, that's not possible for a range of common sense and practical reasons.

I don't think i will get a body guard for her as that will cause other issues. Pia has agreed to visit her aunt for a while. That is better for now I think.

God bless you!

yes thats the wisest thing to do.
i do hope pia on here side will no longer
encounter such bad thing and that she
is always safe.
for the meantime just be there for her always even
by any means of techology.

[jencha8569]

Hi amiga. You know, I met Pia in 2005 so have had a while to think about these things must confess that I never anticipated the fear she now has and the degree of concern I now have over her safety.

The curiosity things we certainly ignore when people are being rude, other times we make friends with people.

Communication is key. Pia and I speak on the phone on average about 6 times a day, send several texts and when her internet access was ok would chat maybe 3 hours plus.

What I need right now is to be there and to kick the proverbials of those that would threaten her. Fortunately for them, that's not possible for a range of common sense and practical reasons.

I don't think i will get a body guard for her as that will cause other issues. Pia has agreed to visit her aunt for a while. That is better for now I think.

God bless you!

yes thats the wisest thing to do.
i do hope pia on here side will no longer
encounter such bad thing and that she
is always safe.
for the meantime just be there for her always
by any means of techology as long as u keep
in touch.

[Piamed]

yes thats the wisest thing to do.
i do hope pia on here side will no longer
encounter such bad thing and that she
is always safe.
for the meantime just be there for her always even
by any means of techology.

Oo, you are so right amiga!

[jencha8569]

Jen

Nice poem sis dyok lang

You'r right same here

indeed ate leah..
but me, you, them, and others who
have a foreigner husband or boyfriend
has their own share of stories in every
situation and time either
good and bad that have been told, will
be told and yet to discover.

im waiting for ur turn ate leah
and among others

[telford]

have you noticed that your hubby never argues with you when you are near your gun?

Income? You want to get paid?

well, luckily, we never argue yet...not even once... maybe he's scared of the .45 he just bought for me as my birthday gift! lol.....

yeah i wanna get paid! there's no free now anymore... lol...

[ginapeterb]

Hello Piamed mate how are you ?

You raise some really good points about safety, I wanted to tell you that you are not alone in having comments made about you.

Hahaha, they always comment about me, for years I have been going to Phils, still they comment about me on the Barangays, if its not my beer belly, its my blonde hair, or people can be quite rude, sometimes they are commenting on how my girl and I have sex ??

Oh yes yes yes, they do comment about it, they would want to know every intricate little detail, they are fascinated by the thought of it, but you know mate, its never the educated that do this, its mainly in my experience, the tambayan types, or the Tambay, the ones who have nothing to do all day but sit and comment.

Whatever one does, you will never escape from being commented about, I am sure they find much to comment about you, but because we are all different, they are tickled by it, and they love a good story, and if their is a scandal to be had, they love that even more.

Sometimes some of their comments can be extremely rude, sometimes my girl would tell me, its ok, they did not say anything, but when I press her about the matter, she is embarassed to tell me, its normally sexual inuendo, and as for safety, yes mate we have to keep them safe, I did put a 10 point plan about safety in a recent post, as for someone sticking a knife in me, my dearest thinks they would not want to chance their luck, I would wrap their knife around there neck, the only thing I am scared of, is being confronted with a gun, when I myself am not armed.

I just wish sometimes I could carry my own 45 handgun, or a.n.other weapon, i would feel much safer, but sadly foreigners are not allowed to do this.

Good points mate take care.

[Sangoma]

It's not good to hear of the problems, but I don't think that guns always give you an advantage. If they know you have it, or they get in first, it can be a disadvantage.

The likelyhood of people with you being shot is higher if you have a gun.

I carried one every day for 15 years, then decided that unless I was in control of the situation, it would be quite likely to guarantee shots being fired. Then there is the possibility of a knife in your back just to get hold of the firearm.

[Tonet]

I live in a rough place in Philippines Caloocan to be exact. near Tondo. in our family its only my niece who get robbed few months ago. they got her phone but she manage to get it back. and it happened because she came home so late from overtime at work. and then she took her phone out to switch it off while the trike she was in stopped to unload one passenger.

What i'm trying to say is in Philippines you need to take extra safety precaution ALL the time. when i was still there i never get dressed when i'm going to get money, even my family doesn't know where i'm going. when your taking money from atm try to go the one where security guard can see you. and take the bus/jeep/trike or even taxi as soon as you get the money. NEVER take a walk, as someone can easily follow you. NEVER NEVER NEVER take your phone out your bag or pocket when in an open area specially when its a nice one.

And always keep in a low profile try as much as possible to act, speak and spend just like the way when you dont have a foreign partner. people would always think as if you won a lottery coz u're now with a foreigner, and you've got to make them see you're not as rich as they think.

[KeithD]

when i was still there i never get dressed when i'm going to get money

You go naked???

[Piamed]

Hello Piamed mate how are you ?

You raise some really good points about safety, I wanted to tell you that you are not alone in having comments made about you.

Hahaha, they always comment about me, for years I have been going to Phils, still they comment about me on the Barangays, if its not my beer belly, its my blonde hair, or people can be quite rude, sometimes they are commenting on how my girl and I have sex ??

Oh yes yes yes, they do comment about it, they would want to know every intricate little detail, they are fascinated by the thought of it, but you know mate, its never the educated that do this, its mainly in my experience, the tambayan types, or the Tambay, the ones who have nothing to do all day but sit and comment.

Whatever one does, you will never escape from being commented about, I am sure they find much to comment about you, but because we are all different, they are tickled by it, and they love a good story, and if their is a scandal to be had, they love that even more.

Sometimes some of their comments can be extremely rude, sometimes my girl would tell me, its ok, they did not say anything, but when I press her about the matter, she is embarassed to tell me, its normally sexual inuendo, and as for safety, yes mate we have to keep them safe, I did put a 10 point plan about safety in a recent post, as for someone sticking a knife in me, my dearest thinks they would not want to chance their luck, I would wrap their knife around there neck, the only thing I am scared of, is being confronted with a gun, when I myself am not armed.

I just wish sometimes I could carry my own 45 handgun, or a.n.other weapon, i would feel much safer, but sadly foreigners are not allowed to do this.

Good points mate take care.

Hi there Pete. You are totally right, there are so many comments made, of all types; I must admit that I'm only inclined to take note when I think someone is disrespecting my queen.

As you alluded, so many more people are fascinated by the 'validity' of our relationship than with making horrible comments. They then say things like, " oh, yours is really a genuine relationship". Hehe!

I guess growing up in a rough part of London that was always in the news in the 80s, I am used to knives being pulled out on me. I know that as long as I can see it a knife is also unlikely to be used against me.

As we both know, knives are close quarter weapons and it takes a very unusual person or circumstance for one to be used against a larger and meaner looking apponent (ako ). With a knive there is always the chance that the attacker can have the knife taken off him and used against him.

Anyway, I pray that neither you or I, or indeed anyone else on this forum is ever put in the horrible situations we have been discussing lately.

All the best to Gina and your good self!

Toks

[alicat]

You go naked???

[nomorericepleas]

I Thought Tonet Made Good Sensible Points. My First Experience Of Crime Was Sitting In Jollybee, My Fiancee Put Her Bag On The Seat Next To Her While We Read Property Leaflets. She Turned And Found Her Mobile Missing And About 3,000 Peso. Some Guy Had Wandered Up And Sat Behind My Fiancee. She Was Devastated, She Work Months In China To Buy That Cp, She Loved It. All Her Pictures And Contacts Gone.
More Recently We Had Safety Worried In Negros. We Went To Miss Gay, I Was A Judge, God Know Why. The Other Foreigner There Was Robbed And Beaten Up In His Own Home, His Wife Too. Maybe They Were Followed Home. They Lived Not Far Away. Then A Few Days Later The Store Around The Corner To Our House Was Held Up And A Guy Shot Who Resisted. My Fiancee Was Very Worried She Would Be Next Target. Our Home Has Good Doors And Double Locks, Windows Barred And High Walls To The Yard, So Its Not Easy To Get In The House. I Do Worry About Her Leaving The House Though As Its A Short Walk To The Highway Through Wasteland. I Ask Her Not To Go Out Alone At Night And Always Be Vigilant.
She Is Treated Diffrerently With A Foreign Partner, By Her Family Who Expect Hand Outs. She Refuses So They Give Her A Hard Time Always. We Bought A House From Her Uncle, To Save Them Going To Jail For Massive Debts. After Selling They Wanted More. Trouble Never Stopped Since, So She Has Family Worry Aswell As Robber Worries. Some Of Her Friends Are Not As Friendly As Before, Cos They Expect Help When They Need It. When It Doesnt Arrive, They Are Not There Texting Her Anymore. They Aslo Dont Like Lending Her A Phone If Her Load Runs Out, Cos They Expect Her To Have Constant Load Cos Her Bf Is White. Yes Also She Does Get Asked Personal Questions About Me, Usually By The Bayots. I'd Like To Go Cycling More On My Own But My Fiancee Doesnt Like It. I Did It 2 Times Incident Free. I'm Not Sure If She Is More Worried About The Drivers There Or Me Getting Held Up On A Quiet Bit Of Road Or Kidnapped Or Whatever. I Don't Take Any Chances With Safety. My Face Is Fairly Suplado Which Might Put Off Some Attackers. I Look Mean Even If I Dont Feel It. As For Guns, I'd Rather Not. It Could Only Escalate Things As Has Been Said Already. I'd Hope Crooks Couldnt Afford A Gun And Take My Chances 1 On 1 In A Knife Fight. My Fiancee Thinks A Gun Is Good Deterrent. I'm Not Convinced. I Also Agree Big Time With The Poster. Everyone Who Has Anything To Sell Turns Up On Our Doorstep. Lots, Picture Frames, Failed Buisnesses. I'm Tired Of Being Asked To Buy Lots Or Anything Else Going, Just Cos I'm Foreign. I Bought A Lot Off A Friend And Now I Have 3 Lots There, But Still Get Asked If I Want To Buy Things From Total Strangers, Or Fake Friends. Maybe I'm Too Cycnical, But Its Surprising How Many People Tell You They Have Land For Sale The Night They Offer To Meet You For Drinks Or A Singsong. When We Dont Buy We Never Get Invited Out Again. Thats Life. Does Put Me Off Living Permanently Over There, Cos Its A Daily Job Weeding Out Real Friends From Fakes. Anyway Im Getting Off Topic Of Safety And Into Money Matters. Sorry Folks. I Said All I Can , I'll Shut Up

[KeithD]

[keithAngel]

I Thought Tonet Made Good Sensible Points. My First Experience Of Crime Was Sitting In Jollybee,

My Fiancee Put Her Bag On The Seat Next To Her While We Read Property Leaflets. She Turned And Found Her Mobile Missing And About 3,000 Peso.

Some Guy Had Wandered Up And Sat Behind My Fiancee. She Was Devastated, She Work Months In China To Buy That Cp, She Loved It. All Her Pictures And Contacts Gone.


More Recently We Had Safety Worried In Negros. We Went To Miss Gay, I Was A Judge, God Know Why. The Other Foreigner There Was Robbed And Beaten Up In His Own Home, His Wife Too.

Maybe They Were Followed Home. They Lived Not Far Away. Then A Few Days Later The Store Around The Corner To Our House Was Held Up And A Guy Shot Who Resisted.

My Fiancee Was Very Worried She Would Be Next Target. Our Home Has Good Doors And Double Locks, Windows Barred And High Walls To The Yard, So Its Not Easy To Get In The House. I Do Worry About Her Leaving The House Though As Its A Short Walk To The Highway Through Wasteland.

I Ask Her Not To Go Out Alone At Night And Always Be Vigilant.


She Is Treated Diffrerently With A Foreign Partner, By Her Family Who Expect Hand Outs. She Refuses So They Give Her A Hard Time Always.

We Bought A House From Her Uncle, To Save Them Going To Jail For Massive Debts. After Selling They Wanted More. Trouble Never Stopped Since, So She Has Family Worry Aswell As Robber Worries.

Some Of Her Friends Are Not As Friendly As Before, Cos They Expect Help When They Need It. When It Doesnt Arrive, They Are Not There Texting Her Anymore.

They Aslo Dont Like Lending Her A Phone If Her Load Runs Out, Cos They Expect Her To Have Constant Load Cos Her Bf Is White. Yes Also She Does Get Asked Personal Questions About Me, Usually By The Bayots.

I'd Like To Go Cycling More On My Own But My Fiancee Doesnt Like It. I Did It 2 Times Incident Free. I'm Not Sure If She Is More Worried About The Drivers There Or Me Getting Held Up On A Quiet Bit Of Road Or Kidnapped Or Whatever.

I Don't Take Any Chances With Safety. My Face Is Fairly Suplado Which Might Put Off Some Attackers. I Look Mean Even If I Dont Feel It. As For Guns, I'd Rather Not. It Could Only Escalate Things As Has Been Said Already. I'd Hope Crooks Couldnt Afford A Gun And Take My Chances 1 On 1 In A Knife Fight.

My Fiancee Thinks A Gun Is Good Deterrent. I'm Not Convinced. I Also Agree Big Time With The Poster. Everyone Who Has Anything To Sell Turns Up On Our Doorstep. Lots, Picture Frames, Failed Buisnesses. I'm Tired Of Being Asked To Buy Lots Or Anything Else Going, Just Cos I'm Foreign.

I Bought A Lot Off A Friend And Now I Have 3 Lots There, But Still Get Asked If I Want To Buy Things From Total Strangers, Or Fake Friends. Maybe I'm Too Cycnical, But Its Surprising How Many People Tell You They Have Land For Sale The Night They Offer To Meet You For Drinks Or A Singsong.

When We Dont Buy We Never Get Invited Out Again. Thats Life. Does Put Me Off Living Permanently Over There, Cos Its A Daily Job Weeding Out Real Friends From Fakes.

Anyway Im Getting Off Topic Of Safety And Into Money Matters. Sorry Folks. I Said All I Can , I'll Shut Up

there you go boss , get it nomorerice?

[IainBusby]

I like it. It's very good exercise for my very old, very tired and bloodshot eyes.

[nomorericepleas]

losers. give in too easy, is this site run by italians? keep your flags for WW3

[andypaul]

losers. give in too easy, is this site run by italians? keep your flags for WW3

Well Dom is

[Arturo]

Just a newbie at all this really.

Met,online, a really nice lady from Quezon City. Has a good job and needs nothing from me except "me"!

I have / had planned to go to Manila next February, but as as budding geriatric, and even ex Army and ex junior thug, my days of hard facing a kid with knife or gun are long past. I am more pastoral these days.

So are Manila / Quezon City akin to Dodge City or not? I have been warned about the bars and late nights in certain area's, same applies in Manchester really.

It seems less romantic flying out to meet a charming filipina lady - being tooled up to cope with the Clinton gang, and the Asian incarnation of Jesse James - just to walk out for a meal.

I did suggest she came around to the hotel after I arrive, - did'nt realise it maybe be better one inside, only to go out to get back on a plane!

Arturo

[lil John]

It's not good to hear of the problems, but I don't think that guns always give you an advantage. If they know you have it, or they get in first, it can be a disadvantage.

The likelyhood of people with you being shot is higher if you have a gun.

I carried one every day for 15 years, then decided that unless I was in control of the situation, it would be quite likely to guarantee shots being fired. Then there is the possibility of a knife in your back just to get hold of the firearm.

IMHO if a person is carrying a gun, and is confronted by a thief with a gun, bring the gun out and shoot, ask questions later. Then there is no worry about having the gun taken away from you.
I would rather be judged by 12 then carried by 6, but this is just my opinion.

[aromulus]

losers. give in too easy, is this site run by italians? keep your flags for WW3

Whaddyahmean...???