Well said, Sophie. The pamamanhikan still is practiced, and guys do give gifts, but they're usually tokens. Like you said, it's the thought and the gesture that counts. Just because a guy doesn't give lavish presents doesn't mean he's considered "kuripot".

Unfortunately, you can see that the guys on this forum feel a bit of pressure to spend truckloads of money just because they're chatted with a young Filipina. For example, there's a sticky outlining how much tp spend. And you can tell from the threads that collectively, the men on this forum alone (not counting the bajillions more that aren't members here) have sent several million pesos to the Phlippines for this and that.

Going back to the original question, I'm not questioning Filipinos. I'm trying to understand the extreme "save the women" attitude that seems to be everywhere here. I did wonder if Brits also tried to save their countrywomen and if the pressure is because it's expected of their culture, or if it's a personal choice. After reading all the replies, I actually did find a lot of good answers and have come to the conclusion it's all personal choice.

Quote Originally Posted by bornatbirth View Post
i think all those guys offering you lots of gifts are just being macho and bragging to you and trying to impress you!

i was also wondering why they offered you so much?

what did you have on them?

i think the foreigners you chatted with probably just earned more money and could offer you better gifts?,i dont it matters where a man comes from more to do with his job!
These were men I knew in person. This is the first forum of this kind that I've ever been on. And I didn't have anything on them. It was always a complete surprise whenever I got offered anything. I never accepted gifts from anyone I wasn't in a relationship with, and even then, only the cheap gifts. I'd rather be impressed by the guy's personality than by the money he spends on me and the "security" he can give me (security that I can have myself if I just work hard).

But anyway, thanks for the insight. I probably have as much money to my name as those guys have in their pockets (so you're right about the wealthy part), but they knew from the very beginning that I was fiercely independent and wouldn't accept help that I didn't ask for. I dunno, maybe the reason they kept trying to give me things that got more expensive with each offer was that it became a challenge to see who could get Denise to say yes. They didn't realise if they'd given me a hug when I was sad, told me about their day so I'd feel like I was being invited to be a part of their life, and listened when I was upset, they'd have won me over completely (no money spent).