I realise it's a great temptation to do this, Tim. And it's the sort of thing I might so easily have succumbed to myself. But frankly, you're wasting your time ... and money ... because there's no point in "flogging a dead horse ... "!Originally Posted by South-east boy
By MY reckoning,you're a really decent guy ... who deserves a lot better ... and, trust me, you WILL meet someone worthy of your affection!
I realise it's a great temptation to do this, Tim. And it's the sort of thing I might so easily have succumbed to myself. But frankly, you're wasting your time ... and money ... because there's no point in "flogging a dead horse ... "!
By MY reckoning,
Just had another night without much sleep!
Hi Arthur. I didn't mean ring her myself, I wondered if a different Phils phone no. had rang her, if she would have answered it/will answer it to know if the reasons/excuses she gave were true or not?
One other thing, is that once a while back when I was getting the make-up etc as presents, of course I had to mention it, as I would not know about what colours/shades for her, I did half jokingly say, that with all this great make-up that I was worried that she would have a lot of guys after her and she said that she would not be interested, that she is only talking to me. Why if I was just a friend would I say such a thing? Surely that would have said to her that I thought more of her as a friend? And with the presents if you were her and you thought of me of just friends, then you heard about me buying the presents, would you not say, don't spend much, as we are only friends, spend it on a future GF etc? Would a friend go to as much trouble over a friend that he has never met? Personally if I knew someone that I thought of as a friend was sending me lots of things, when I was sending them nothing, I would feel quite embarrassed and awkward about it. She also never asked me about how I was getting on with any ladies and if I was going on any dates etc. If she thought of me as just a friend, wouldn't she have asked that in some point in the past?
She also started the Yahoo conversation yesterday with "Hello friend" which she has never said before in the whole time that we have been in contact. I think that she's either met this other guy or has decided on him, so is trying to distance herself from me.
This is what partly worries me about flying to see a lady so quickly, I like to get to know someone well as then over a period of time you will get to know them and know how various things make them feel -happy and sad. Hopefully they will show what they are really like. If she has shown how she really is now and is maybe not so nice & caring, what if I had flown to see her a while back? She could put on the same front as earlier and I could be arranging to marry her without knowing what she is really like and any not-so nice hidden sides that she has.
She had said before that her parents wanted her to find a guy from Europe or USA and that she has never bothered with other guys or Phils guys
Hello tim, i'm sorry for what happened, i know how much it must have hurt you but for what it's worth, atleast now you know the truth and no longer left in the dark wondering.....
I don't want to play devil's advocate but i got a strong feeling she already met this danish guy, i suspect that guy was over there the entire 12 days you cannot get hold of her.
And i don't believe her claims either that she's not in contact with any other guys but you. She must be chatting to this guy thesame time she's chatting with you.
And she must have lied to you about it since it will just put you off if you find out. She obviously kept her options open.
And when this danish guy decided to go there and visit her, she still did not tell you about him, she probably figured that if it doesn't work out with this guy, she still got you....
And now that she could have already met this guy and it went well, that's when she finally decided to ditch you and all of a sudden came up with claims about you as
being "just friends" and nothing special between you two, when she was quite sweet with her messages to you before which is certainly not in a "friendship" kind of way,
not to mention happily accepting all the presents you sent for her and her family without any hesitation or reluctance.
And looks like she's sticking to her previous story up to now that she's never been in contact with any other guy, to probably save her face and not admit she's a big liar.....
It's quite far fetched that this danish guy, who she claims as a total stranger and who she never chatted to nor she ever seen in photos,
suddenly decided to meet her next week and just like that, she made up her mind over this guy? I don't think so and i don't buy it.
She obviously met and have been with this guy already for her to make up her mind and be deadset on this danish guy and get rid of you just like that
after everything you had before and after all the nice things you've done for her....
She's not right for you and if its any consolation, i think its for the best since you wouldn't want to be with the kind of woman that she is.....
Life is too short to waste our time and emotions to undeserving and unworthy people who bother not to reciprocate our genuine affection....
and if i were you, i won't mourn nor feel sad about loosing her, she's not worth your tears and grief......Its her loss, not yours.
"10% of life is made up of what happens to you, 90% is decided by how you react"
"The way to love anything is to realize that it may be lost"
Thanks Sophie, you are very good with wordsYes yours and my suspiscions were correct as it turns out. One of the first things that I said was that I hope that she is not seeing another guy.
Tim, you should stop communicating with her, the more you chat with her the more she will hurt you. She will always justify her actions and she believed that she did nothing wrong ( trying to have a clean conscience???). Try to see it on a bright side, you're lucky that you did not end up with her, she's a good storyteller
In time you will find someone who will love you sincerely. You deserve someone far more better than her.
Though you do not write books, you are the writer of your life. Because everything depends on YOU.
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