babies

[aposhark]

....is it the waltons or is it the von traps

We'll see

[joebloggs]

My wife does not want me to have the snip as she says she may want one dozen kids
I said I may want the snip if we have had three kids.
Well, having lots of kids is financially difficult in the UK but easier in the Phils.

12 kids , one is a handful ...

not so sure, you would get child benefit for each of them til their what 16, free NHS treatment and schooling, and maybe even tax creds.

not so sure about snipping anything, but my misses had one of these implants done



http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/physical..._implant.shtml

[stevewool]

well i am not having the chop and all i was saying on here is my worries for the future of myself and emma and any future child, dont get me wrong england is still a good place to be, to bring up a family, like someone says free this and free that, i want only what i think we are entitled too, if you dont work and live on the dole and dont want anything england is great for those, but i want a better future for myself and partner and i think that is in the phils, but not for kids,

[KeithD]

i will never ever have the snip

I'd recommend sleeping with one eye open then during tampo periods

[aposhark]

12 kids , one is a handful ...

not so sure, you would get child benefit for each of them til their what 16, free NHS treatment and schooling, and maybe even tax creds.

not so sure about snipping anything, but my misses had one of these implants done

I'm not a spring chicken anymore either.....thanks for the implant info.
Are you trusting it as your only contraception?

[aposhark]

well i am not having the chop and all i was saying on here is my worries for the future of myself and emma and any future child, dont get me wrong england is still a good place to be, to bring up a family, like someone says free this and free that, i want only what i think we are entitled too, if you dont work and live on the dole and dont want anything england is great for those, but i want a better future for myself and partner and i think that is in the phils, but not for kids,

Why not for kids?
Kids have respect for elders over there.

[KeithD]

Why would you need the snip anyway... a woman has other holes

[stevewool]

indeed they do have more respect then the kids here , over there everyone seems to want to send there kids to private school for a better future, its just trying to get everything right for the future in my little world

[stevewool]

well boss man yes they do

[joebloggs]

I'm not a spring chicken anymore either.....thanks for the implant info.
Are you trusting it as your only contraception?

it lasts 3yrs and only doing once in 3yrs helps to not have more kids

my misses was reading this reply many hours ago, shes wondering what i'm upto

(another ad, misses dont have tampo days ) can't say it works for all thou

[aposhark]

it lasts 3yrs and only doing once in 3yrs helps to not have more kids

my misses was reading this reply many hours ago, shes wondering what i'm upto

(another ad, misses dont have tampo days ) can't say it works for all thou

Sounds like you're relaxing and not over-exerting yourself

[joebloggs]

Sounds like you're relaxing and not over-exerting yourself

you've got to pace yourself mrshark, wait til your little'un is born , i've got to keep me wits about me or little joe will land a punch to my face

all the best to you and your misses

[gWaPito]

[QUOTE=Doc Alan;226528]

The facts are the highest chance is in your 20's (3years and below vasectomy) which is 97% the lowest being 79% ( thoses are guy with 15 years plus between vasectomy and reversal) chance of getting pregnant..[/QUOTE
With respect, quoting "facts" to such a degree of "accuracy" is misleading. All medical practice must be evidence based. No studies are accepted as evidence without including confidence limits, numbers of patients involved, and meta analysis (comparison of similar published studies in peer-reviewed journals). Don't believe such apparently precise figures!
Vasectomy involves tying, stitching or cauterising (burning) the vas deferens (each of the tubes leading from the testes to the penis) so that sperm, while still produced, cannot exit through the penis. The volume and appearance of the ejaculate, and sexual desire, are little altered. The testes remain normal. The sperm are broken down in the testes. Reversal is technically difficult and not usually effective. Even mechanical success does not equate to success in achieving pregnancy with the partner, and may not be permanent.
The sperm may be abnormal, possibly because of antibody production, and there is an increased chance of birth defects. Cryostorage (freezing) of sperm before vasectomy is possible.

I am aware of the process, I didnt want to bore the readers.

As for the antibodies, I'm also aware of that.
You mention higher risk of birth defects, that is also a known fact that if either partner are there 40's the risk of have a child with defects are laso greatly increased, with or with out reversed vasectomy.


The figures I quoted are from the surgeon concerned, these are his figures for the year ending December 2009 based on the findings of the 342 reversals made that year.
Hence the figures I stated.

I also said, not all are sucessfull.

All what is guranteed in life is death and taxes.

[aposhark]

you've got to pace yourself mrshark, wait til your little'un is born , i've got to keep me wits about me or little joe will land a punch to my face

all the best to you and your misses

Thanks a lot, Joe.
I am still running a lot to prepare for the exertion

[ladyvhee]

Hi
I know how it feels like, I have no children too. My husband has had a vasectomy before 25 years ago. Me and my hubby had a big discussions before we got married that he cant have children anymore. Having children is wonderfull but if ,she loves you she will accept who you are. Now we are happily together and always in love.
( as a filipino you cannot avoid your relatives to ask you some questions about having children. I usually reply them im happy not to have one.)

[Arthur Little]

Hi
I know how it feels like, I have no children too. My husband has had a vasectomy before 25 years ago. Me and my hubby had a big discussions before we got married that he cant have children anymore. Having children is wonderfull but if ,she loves you she will accept who you are. Now we are happily together and always in love.
( as a filipino you cannot avoid your relatives to ask you some questions about having children. I usually reply them im happy not to have one.)

Each to their own ... and if both partners are happy with that, then so be it! to the filipinouk forum.

[bornatbirth]

she doesnt sound happy to me and regrets not having any kids?.

[gecko_pikachu]

Hi Steve,

I respect your decision of not having any kids of Emma.
.. but you have to consider Emma's thoughts and feelings either.
You should've told her for the first place right from the start that you want no kids.
Being honest in the relationship is very important and you know that yourself BUT you should've opened out more about this very complicated issue even before.

But having said that, it's still up to both of you what's the best thing to do.
I know how hard the responsibilities of looking after kids, etc. but perhaps Emma will be happier if she has at least your own child.
I was so bored when I came here for the first few months but I did feel a lot happier and stronger when I had my first child.
It was too much on the plate having a baby yet it's really rewarding and worth it to have one... and now, I have 2 .
Just imagine a house with no kids, I'll be bored.
They are my pride, my everything..
It just takes time for you Steve to get used to have a newborn baby in the house.
But at the end of the day, it's still your child and no one else can make you happier than seeing your baby's smile... and scream?
Oh well, they do grow very fast.
They won't be like that forever.
Just take life easy.
I don't want the both of you to rush about any decisions that you have to make.
I also don't want the both of you to regret things at the end and it's too late.
Goodluck...
Everything has a reason...
And hope you'll choose the right path on to your decision

[James Hubbard]

i don't want to ruffle any feathers or anything ... but ....

I was born when my dad was 37 ... or maybe 38.

I got taunted in school coz my dad was old. In secondary school especially, he was remarkably out of touch.

hmmm

When I was 10, he was only 48. I was already being taunted for it.

....

flip to my friend in the Phils. I was living in the same subdivision as a man - a white guy, whose wife is 23, and the guy is 68. Personally, ... that's a massive age gap, but whatever - their life.

....

anyway ... so the girl gets pregnant right? In like 8 years, the dude dies and the girl is a single mother.

That's a great way to love your child, right? Be so old when he/she's born that you die when he/she's in his/her formative years... the child is 8 years old and daddy dies of "natural causes" or Old Age. Great dad.

Sorry for being so blunt. It's just my view.

thanks for listening.

James "tell-the-truth-whether-you-like-it-or-not" Hubbard!

[malditako]

im eldest in family and father died when i was 2 years old not from old age (he's just 22 then) but from accident..we grew up without a dad beside us but then we were loved by all of our friends, relatives, and family and supported us as we growing up...i know it had been hard for mum but look at the bright side...she was not left alone by my dad she have us and she's happy having us (good remembrance from my dad) ...having a kind of life i have right now (my husband and baby) is more than enough to thank my dad for bringing me out in this world

just sharing my experience here

[RickyR]

I'm going through the concerns of having a vasectomy at the moment, our little boy is due next month and we already have a little girl from Marvie's previous marriage. This for me is going to be enough, and I want to have a vasectomy after that, but having been told by a few people not to take it too lightly, and now reading some regrets on here is making me a think a little. I can say 100% I don't want more then 2 children, but obviously no idea what the future may hold.

[KeithD]

Sorry for being so blunt. It's just my view.

Well if the kid when it's born can't go out to hunt it own food, then it's not the parents fault

It's not that long ago that humans were lucky to live till 40, most fathers died around the age of 30.

In the animal kingdom it's usually the oldest male that mates with all the females, so all you guys would still be virgins while your dad/grandad was still putting it about

[stevewool]

lots of good reading a good letter there james looking to the future hubbard,the end of the day its down to two people what is best for them, now and the future, and for now we have each other and thats a great start

[Arthur Little]

I was born when my dad was 37 ... or maybe 38.

I got taunted in school coz my dad was old. In secondary school especially, he was remarkably out of touch.

hmmm

When I was 10, he was only 48. I was already being taunted for it.

... oh dear, James ... MY daughter - 41 next Sunday - was 37 when she had HER firstborn. She was already 40 when she gave birth to her second child. I hope her two kids don't have to endure what you'd to go through ...

[Arthur Little]

i don't want to ruffle any feathers or anything ... but ....

....

flip to my friend in the Phils. I was living in the same subdivision as a man - a white guy, whose wife is 23, and the guy is 68. Personally, ... that's a massive age gap, but whatever - their life.

....

anyway ... so the girl gets pregnant right? In like 8 years, the dude dies and the girl is a single mother.

That's a great way to love your child, right? Be so old when he/she's born that you die when he/she's in his/her formative years... the child is 8 years old and daddy dies of "natural causes" or Old Age. Great dad.

Sorry for being so blunt. It's just my view.

thanks for listening.

James "tell-the-truth-whether-you-like-it-or-not" Hubbard!

... conversely, I became a father when I was barely 25 - an ideal age in my opinion - and it goes against the NATURAL order of things for s of 60+ to take up the mantle of parenthood again at THEIR time of life. I for one, certainly wouldn't want to - and - in so saying - could well find myself ruffling more than a few feathers too. But, as I mentioned in a previous post on this topic, I guess it's a matter of couples choosing for themselves.

[triple5]

I know a guy who has just turned 65 and has a boy and girl who are 3 and 4 with his 25yr old wife. It's never too late, I guess, but you have to consider your own mortality and how long you'll be around for your kids.

[Arthur Little]

It's never too late, I guess, *but you have to consider your own mortality and how long you'll be around for your kids.

*Absolutely, Paul ...

[James Hubbard]

... oh dear, James ... MY daughter - 41 next Sunday - was 37 when she had HER firstborn. She was already 40 when she gave birth to her second child. I hope her two kids don't have to endure what you'd to go through ...

yes, i really hope that they don't have to endure that taunting from other kids.

[gecko_pikachu]

The kids here in the UK are bullies!
And obviously no one likes a bully.
I'm so aware that Filipino kids are not like that.
They have more respect to other people.
They tend to respect you more if you're foreigner.
... and also treat you very well.
So maybe it's not a downside to older fathers married to Filipinas to eventually migrate to the Philippines when you're financially stable.
Your kids have more chances to become a model.
... to be an actor or something, etc!

Some people today are so mean.
Unfortunately, you can find them everywhere you turn.
Just ignore them.
When someone is being mean to you--or to the world at large, for that matter--you should realize that the problem lies with him, and not with you.

To Steve,
Being a father at your age is not a problem at all.
To be honest, I think bringing up children is a lot easier now than it was 20 years ago.
There are better childcare facilities, more reliable medicines, disposable nappies.
It makes fatherhood much more straightforward.
Don't make your age an issue.
You're still young at heart and I know you could still cope with fatherhood.
In many ways I can feel like you have an advantage over younger dads.
You've got more life experience and more time to invest in your children.
You can be a constant role model rather than someone who just pops up now and again to tell them off.
For instance, Sir Paul McCartney became a dad for the fourth time at 61.

Old fathers are three times more likely to take regular responsibility for a young child.
They are more likely to be fathers by choice and this means that they become more positively involved with the child.
They behave more like mothers, smiling at the baby and gurgling - although young fathers are probably better at getting down on the floor for physical play

[stevie c]

I know a guy who has just turned 65 and has a boy and girl who are 3 and 4 with his 25yr old wife. It's never too late, I guess, but you have to consider your own mortality and how long you'll be around for your kids.

i fully agree