A desperate situation - advice needed

[troubled]

You all have a point, and I'm guessing some of you are western men and some are Fillipinas/os?

I am learning a lot about myself here in San Fernando (Pamp) - mainly that almost all of our problems are down to my negativity, expecting the worst and being worried about what she isn't instead of concentrating on what she is - a decent girl who loves her family and just wants emotional security.

We are taught to only be satisfied with perfect and cannot handle the reality of being with another person. We should not except one other person to be able to fulfill everything we wish for. That's why there are friends and family... to even out the load of needs and wants.

I could go to Thailand end of this month and not return, this is what I thought yesterday when things were bad and she wasn't speaking, however - this would be an awful thing to do so I will fly her out for my birthday, enjoy some much needed time away and if all goes well i'll take a chance.

I am a nice bloke but I do have a tendancy to expect the worst. I'm intelligent enough to see I'm not being used but of course they are hoping we will last... Me too.

"Think positive and positive things will happen" Can't remember who said that but it's very true. Extreemly difficult for me to STAY positive but I must try or I will drag her down with me when depressed.

[walesrob]

You all have a point, and I'm guessing some of you are western men and some are Fillipinas/os?

I am learning a lot about myself here in San Fernando (Pamp) - mainly that almost all of our problems are down to my negativity, expecting the worst and being worried about what she isn't instead of concentrating on what she is - a decent girl who loves her family and just wants emotional security.

We are taught to only be satisfied with perfect and cannot handle the reality of being with another person. We should not except one other person to be able to fulfill everything we wish for. That's why there are friends and family... to even out the load of needs and wants.

I could go to Thailand end of this month and not return, this is what I thought yesterday when things were bad and she wasn't speaking, however - this would be an awful thing to do so I will fly her out for my birthday, enjoy some much needed time away and if all goes well i'll take a chance.

I am a nice bloke but I do have a tendancy to expect the worst. I'm intelligent enough to see I'm not being used but of course they are hoping we will last... Me too.

"Think positive and positive things will happen" Can't remember who said that but it's very true. Extreemly difficult for me to STAY positive but I must try or I will drag her down with me when depressed.

Reading your post, I think its plain to see you really are confused, and don't know what to do, which is why everyone, and I mean EVERYONE on this thread is screaming at you to get out of this situation and think things through, then come back and make a decision. Positive or negative are the words you are using here, but what you need is some time out, some dose of "REALITY".

Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind, and I'll say it again, there are many, many single Filipina girls looking for a guy like you.

Seems to me like you've made up your mind, whatever you choose, good luck.